The Student Room Group

Freshers

Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is
Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hi there!! (:

Really sorry to hear you've been finding it a bit tricky getting to know people ☹️ - maybe a tad because your 17, i know when i did freshers i was also 17 and found some activies like clubbing i couldnt do because of my age - but there were still tons of activities throughout the week (& also through the year!) running where i could get invovled! - i'd reccomend having a wee look at the societies your uni has running and maybe joining one! - that way you could meet some people where you already have something in common which always makes it that bit easier! 😊

guessing you probably havent fully started lecutres yet but once they start trying to get to know people on your course is always great for making friends (: - suggesting to go and look over some stuff from lectures and get a coffee or something is a good way to get to know people & also means you have some people to study with!

hope this helps, wishing u the best of luck!!

Emily
Year 3, Chemistry
Official University Of Strathclyde Rep

Reply 2

Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hi,

So sorry to hear about the situation you have found yourself in, starting uni can be very tough, especially as you are 17 so activities like clubbing are not available to you.

Have you started your course yet? That will be the next best opportunity to speak to new people and make friends! My best advice is to just put yourself out there as much as you can and speak to anyone and everyone. You will find that you click better with some people than others and you will start to find things In common with people.

Does your uni hold a freshers fair? Freshers fairs are great as there are so many opportunities to sign up for clubs and societies which again will mean that you will start to meet new people that have a common interest as you are both at the same club/society! There will also be hundreds of students in the same place at the freshers fair so plenty of opportunities to get speaking to people!

I hope this response has helped slightly! Keep going and it will become easier and you will start to meet lots of people! Let me know if you have any other questions, I am more than happy to help!

Thanks, Matt 🙂
Official LJMU Student Rep
t
Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hi @Anonymous. I am sorry to hear your feeling this way! My advice would be to join societies or study groups. This would be a great way to make friends as there would be likeminded individuals there who have the same interests as you. Or you could join apps to help you make friends near to your location. I hope this helped 😃

Kiran

Reply 4

Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

I would try not to get put down by a small number of interactions very early on in your university experience. I would recommend trying to be friendly when you interact with flat mates but it sounds like you need to increase your opportunities. I would go try and reaching out to others, people on your course & try lots societies, even weird ones (societies, often the kind if odd activities have really great social scenes), the main thing is finding people with similar vibe. Even try just going and chatting people in the social areas at your halls, it can be very daunting but just go & be the person making the first move with lots of people.
(edited 2 months ago)

Reply 5

Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hi there,

I am sorry to hear about your struggles in making friends. Don't be too hard on yourself as uni just started, it will take time to meet people you can click with 🤗 Personally I only found friends that I clicked with in my 2nd year of uni after I had joined a society for a while and met people outside of my course as a Student Ambassador!
Give yourself some time and take the initiative to try out societies that interests you, film screenings or student union events 😚 I wish you the best of luck in your university journey!

Zhi En
(Kingston Student Rep.)
Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hi Anon,

Just to give you some reassurance, I graduated back in July and my closest friends from university were people I'd met through my course and I haven't spoken to my original flat in over two years! While it can feel awkward, not getting along with your flat is not the end of the world.

It may be in part because you are 17 (although personally I think it's a bit off to not be friends with a flatmate because they don't go clubbing or drink), and it may be that their personalities just gel more with each other. I'd stay friendly with your flat but focus your energy on meeting new people from your course or societies.

Rebecca (Lancaster Student Ambassador)
Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hey,
I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It’s completely understandable to feel down, especially when you've made such an effort. Please know that you are not doing anything wrong.
You asked if it could be because you're 17; it might be a tiny factor, but honestly, it's not the main reason. The real truth is that Freshers' Week is a lot of pressure for everyone, and friendships take time to grow. Don't worry if you haven't clicked with your flatmates; you don't have to be best friends with them.
The best way to meet people is by joining societies based on your interests and hobbies, or try to spark a small convo with your classmates after lectures. That way, you'll naturally connect with people who are on your wavelength. 🤝
It's still early, though. Be patient with yourself. You will find your people. 😊

Rachel
(Third Year)
Undergraduate Multimedia Journalism

Reply 8

Original post
by Anonymous
Hi, i honestly dont know how to word this but basically i have made no friends during freshers.
I even live in student accommodation and all my flatmates seem to just talk to me for 3 seconds and then shut me out so i end up just staying in my room.
could it be cause im 17? because i am always friendly to everyone so im not sure what the problem is

Hey there 👋

My name is Siobhan and I’m a recent graduate from the University of Lancashire 🎓 I’m sorry to hear that you’re not having the best first week at uni and I want to reassure you that it’s not all like this!!

What you’re experiencing is so much more common than it seems, especially in the first few weeks of uni when everyone’s still figuring things out and it’s not your fault at all if they are not engaging with you.

I highly doubt that your age has anything to do with it. Loads of students start uni under 18, and the age gap honestly means very little most people don’t even notice. I’m 21 now and some of my closest friends from uni are in their 40s!!

If you are still feeling uneasy where you are living after a couple weeks the you could always contact your accommodation and see if there is another place you could move to? My friend did this in first year as the was out with a group of third years and felt a bit isolated, but managed to move and make new friends in her new place 🙂

You don’t have to stick only to your flat though, see if your accommodation is doing any welcome parties or Halloween, Christmas parties where you can meet new people ans make friends that way!

Accommodations aren’t the only way that you make friends in uni, there’s loads of other ways you can look into!

You could also look at your university's sports clubs or societies and see if there's any that you might enjoy. They typically do social nights out so that could be a great way to make new friends! Info on this is normally on your uni's student union so I would have a browse there.

You could also look at social media and connect to people through there! You could find people in groups who are doing your course or who share your accommodation. It's also a great way to keep track of any events going on there.

It might feel a bit daunting at first but it does get easier as it goes on 🙂

I hope this has helped and please let me know if you have any more questions at all!!

Siobhan (Student Ambassador for the University of Lancashire)

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