Homesick at uni
I’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Reply 1
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Another tip maybe try to do some creative things in your spare time any hobbies maybe try to think of this as a positive thing and make it relaxing I would make a routine to work on myself for example going gym before uni getting cute things for my accom make it cute and fun make it feel like your place etc maybe that can help too 🙂 I hope you feel better and good luck 😊
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
I would try and seek out some help at university because being homesick is normal. Universities often have specific support for this so maybe try and look out for these. You should go to your GP as well, especially as you are not sleeping or eating properly. Have you spoken to anyone about how you are feeling?
Reply 3
Stick it out for a few more weeks. Its normal to feel homesick so lots of students will be feeling the same as you.
Join some societies and find friends who share the same hobby or sport as you. Once you find your groove you will love it.
Join some societies and find friends who share the same hobby or sport as you. Once you find your groove you will love it.
Reply 4
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Hi Anon,
I know it feels right now that the homesickness will never go away, but I really recommend giving it a bit more time. This is a massive transition, and will be a huge shock to your system. In addition to the stress, if you're not sleeping or eating well, your body will be struggling even more with the change.
Please reach out to your university's support services, they are here to help you when you feel like this and they will know that many freshers will feel how you do. I'd also recommend trying to arrange things to do with the people you've met, especially as you say they're nice. Maybe go for a walk together to explore, arrange a group meal, or all meet up to watch a film? It's nice to have plans to look forward to and it can help distract you.
Finally it's really important that you are sleeping and eating the best you can, especially with freshers flu knocking on your door! I'm a bit of an insomniac and my sleep schedule completely collapses when I go through life changes, but I've found forcing myself to at least stay in bed during the time I want to be sleeping does help a lot. I often listen to streams or podcasts on very low volume. If I slept particularly terribly I'll sometimes add in a short early afternoon nap to supplement the missing sleep! Food wise, I always have some really easy meals in the freezer so it's not an extra chore if you I feel up to cooking. It might be fun to plan some batch cooking meals to give you something to do - I've always found preparing a meal really rewarding for how low effort it can be.
Best of luck with university, I hope it gets a bit easier for you.
Rebecca (Lancaster Student Ambassador)
Reply 5
Hi there,
I know what you mean about not wanting to simply stick it out and wait for things to get better, because I was in a similar situation in my first year and really wasn't sure if I could cope. Things got better for me naturally when my course got going, there were more lectures to go to, work to do, and I started getting familiar with my coursemates and established a routine. If you do choose to stay at your current uni I would hope when things settle down and the year gets going properly you'll start to feel more confident.
I would think about the pros and cons of staying here VS moving unis closer to home - maybe even make a list to help you decide which option would be best for you. If you stayed, what can you do to try and make your situation more positive? Is there anything you can join or people you could put yourself out there to meet? If you went to a new uni, how would you feel about having to navigate a new place, settle in and meet a whole new bunch of people, and get used to a new course which doesn't directly align with what you want to do? What would feel better for you in the long run?
I hope this adds, best of luck and please try not to worry, because at the end of it all you will end up with circumstances you're happy with 🙂
University of Bath
I know what you mean about not wanting to simply stick it out and wait for things to get better, because I was in a similar situation in my first year and really wasn't sure if I could cope. Things got better for me naturally when my course got going, there were more lectures to go to, work to do, and I started getting familiar with my coursemates and established a routine. If you do choose to stay at your current uni I would hope when things settle down and the year gets going properly you'll start to feel more confident.
I would think about the pros and cons of staying here VS moving unis closer to home - maybe even make a list to help you decide which option would be best for you. If you stayed, what can you do to try and make your situation more positive? Is there anything you can join or people you could put yourself out there to meet? If you went to a new uni, how would you feel about having to navigate a new place, settle in and meet a whole new bunch of people, and get used to a new course which doesn't directly align with what you want to do? What would feel better for you in the long run?
I hope this adds, best of luck and please try not to worry, because at the end of it all you will end up with circumstances you're happy with 🙂
University of Bath
(edited 1 month ago)
Reply 6
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Hi there,
I am sorry that you have been feeling this way so far at uni. I can completely relate to the feeling of homesickness, and how tricky it can be so I just wanted to respond to offer some of my advice in addition to the great advice you have already received.
Firstly, I would agree with comments that say that talking to someone about this is a good idea. There will be student support teams at your uni that you can talk to and are there for the purpose of helping students and talking to them about any issues they may be facing. These are great people to talk to as they see so many students with similar problems so will know what has helped them and how they can help you. You may get a specific student support advisor at your uni so have a look into this, or there will be lots in general at uni.
I do think with homesickness sticking it out is a good idea. I know it can feel so hard at the moment but if you think you can, try to stick it out for a little bit longer as this just allows you to get used to the uni and the people you are living with and you might find out that you start to enjoy it. This would also allow you to continue doing the course you enjoy which would be good, however your mental health comes first so if you are really suffering it might make more sense for you to move home.
I also think that calling home actually really helped me. I know it sounds kind of counterintuitive, but FaceTiming friends and family allowed me to feel like I was still in the loop and involved so it made me feel less sad about not actually being there. I also got my family to come up and visit me, rather than going home in the first month and I think this helped me out too.
Like others have said, things like walking, getting fresh air really help. Try and do things with your flatmates as much as you can too, even if this is just a movie or board games night - it doesn't have to be anything crazy!
I hope some of this helps and everything goes well for you,
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Reply 7
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Hi
I am really sorry you’re going through this, It can definitely be very difficult leaving your family and being alone somewhere else. If it’s really affecting your mental health then you can try and visit your family often (every week or bi-weekly), so you can gradually adapt and know that you can always go back home when you’re free. With time and once you find your group if friends the homesickness will slowly fade away 🌷
Wishing you the best 🌷
-Sarah (Kingston Rep)
Reply 8
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Hey @anonymous #1
Thank you for your vulnerability and I am really sorry about the experience you have had so far. Like you said, it is normal, however there are ways to go about it before you decide to completely move. I have been in your position before and I understand how much homesickness can take a toll on you, but the methods listed below worked for me and I really hope they will work for you.
•
I firstly advise against making a huge life choice while you are feeling this way. I found it best to make huge decisions when you are in a better place and to get to that place:
1.
Joining societies or sport clubs is always helpful, not only is it a great distraction but you get to meet and interact with new people also helping you make friends.
2.
Being around people is great for regulating your nervous system, so freshers events, kitchen chats, or even talking to people in your classes is a great way to achieve this.
3.
I find that routinely calling people back home is always helpful. Maximising on video calls and that constant chat makes them feel closer than they are, though it does not replace the real feeling of being at home, it is definitely not a waste.
4.
Going to public places and just giving yourself a chance to explore outside of University is a great distraction from being away from home, as well as an opportunity to meet more new people.
5.
You do not have to be the loudest or most extroverted person to be able to enjoy University, just creating a routine that you are comfortable with is always the best start.
I would definitely say just give it your best shot but of course your mental health is most important. If overtime, you still feel the same then perhaps considering moving back home is an option.
I really hope this was helpful and it makes your experience better. Please feel free to reach out or ask any questions. I wish you all the best.
Ru
BCU student rep.
Reply 9
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Hi Anom,
I'm sorry you feel this way. I was in a very similar position when I started university, sadly feeling homesick is part of the transition really. As the other commentors have stated, give it some more time to see if you adjust. I truly believe the best way to get past feeling homesick is to meet new people, this will help your university feel like your home away from home! Community is a very important, so I recommend joining a society to meet like-minded individuals who are also trying to make new friends!
At the moment things may feel a bit unsettled, but it takes time to get into the rhythm of university. However, it's important to take your mental health seriously. Personally, I spent my first year just giving it a go and living on campus 2.5 hours from home, but this wasn't right for myself. So in second (and now third), I choose to travel, stay at my partner for a day or two, then head back home. I do this every week and my mental health has improved a lot. So, while I highly recommend giving it a bit longer, there is no shame in prioritising your mental wellbeing.
I hope this helps, please feel free to ask me any questions,
-Sophia (University of Lancashire)
Reply 10
Original post
by AnonymousI’ve recently moved into uni and I’m extremely homesick. I haven’t slept adequately, I’m not eating properly, I’m lost, and feel somewhat lonely. I understand this is a normal part of moving on and becoming independent, but I never anticipated I would feel this bad or anxious. The university is lovely and the people seem nice. I’m lucky enough to have the option to move to a uni closer to home, but it does not offer the exact course I am taking. I don’t know whether I should stay (because I don’t think this homesickness will be going away anytime soon) and keep going with this course, or move to another uni with a course I may not be as enthusiastic about but may be beneficial for my mental health in the long run. Everybody says I should keep trying for a few weeks but I don’t think I want to. Any advice?
Hi @Anonymous 👋
I am sorry to hear you are feeling that way. It's normal to feel homesick when you first start and it is assure you that you will be ok. It depends on who when considering how long that feeling of homesickness goes on but once university officially starts and you start to busy yourself with classes, it will be better.
For my first week, I was also homesick and upset but then once classes started and I made friends it got better quickly 😊
I suggest you continue for a few weeks but you dont have to if you really feel as if it won't get better, that is understandable and ok to do. I hope you do feel better.
Essex Student Rep- Lavanya 💜
Reply 11
Original post
by EssexStudentRepHi @Anonymous 👋
I am sorry to hear you are feeling that way. It's normal to feel homesick when you first start and it is assure you that you will be ok. It depends on who when considering how long that feeling of homesickness goes on but once university officially starts and you start to busy yourself with classes, it will be better.
For my first week, I was also homesick and upset but then once classes started and I made friends it got better quickly 😊
I suggest you continue for a few weeks but you dont have to if you really feel as if it won't get better, that is understandable and ok to do. I hope you do feel better.
Essex Student Rep- Lavanya 💜
I am sorry to hear you are feeling that way. It's normal to feel homesick when you first start and it is assure you that you will be ok. It depends on who when considering how long that feeling of homesickness goes on but once university officially starts and you start to busy yourself with classes, it will be better.
For my first week, I was also homesick and upset but then once classes started and I made friends it got better quickly 😊
I suggest you continue for a few weeks but you dont have to if you really feel as if it won't get better, that is understandable and ok to do. I hope you do feel better.
Essex Student Rep- Lavanya 💜
Agree with you
Reply 12
Hi Anonymous!
First of all, I just want to say that you’re not alone in feeling this way. Homesickness can hit a lot harder than people expect, and the fact that you’re feeling anxious, not sleeping well, and struggling to eat isn’t a sign that you’re failing. It’s a totally human response to a massive life change. Moving away from home, adjusting to a new environment, and trying to be independent all at once is a big chnage, even when the uni and the people seem nice.
It’s also really valid that you’re already thinking about what’s best for your mental health long-term. There’s a lot of pressure to “push through” and “give it a few weeks,” and while that might help for some people, it’s okay if you feel like you’ve already hit your limit. Only you can really know what’s best for you.
Before you make a big decision like transferring, it might help to talk things through with your university’s mental health or wellbeing team. They’re there for exactly thi kind of situation, you don’t have to be in crisis to reach out. They can help you unpack how you’re feeling, explore options (including academic flexibility or counselling), and figure out whether staying is manageable with the right support in place. Even just having someone to talk to in a safe, non-judgemental space can really help ease the pressure.
Ifafter exploring support and giving yourself a bit of space, you still feel like transferring closer to home would make you happier and healthier that might be the right option for you. Your wellbeing matters more than any “perfect” course. Sometimes, a slightly less ideal academic path is still the right one if it supports your mental health and allows you to thrive.
Whatever you decide, you’re not failing.
All the best and wishing you luck for whatever choice you make,
Tilly LJMU Student
First of all, I just want to say that you’re not alone in feeling this way. Homesickness can hit a lot harder than people expect, and the fact that you’re feeling anxious, not sleeping well, and struggling to eat isn’t a sign that you’re failing. It’s a totally human response to a massive life change. Moving away from home, adjusting to a new environment, and trying to be independent all at once is a big chnage, even when the uni and the people seem nice.
It’s also really valid that you’re already thinking about what’s best for your mental health long-term. There’s a lot of pressure to “push through” and “give it a few weeks,” and while that might help for some people, it’s okay if you feel like you’ve already hit your limit. Only you can really know what’s best for you.
Before you make a big decision like transferring, it might help to talk things through with your university’s mental health or wellbeing team. They’re there for exactly thi kind of situation, you don’t have to be in crisis to reach out. They can help you unpack how you’re feeling, explore options (including academic flexibility or counselling), and figure out whether staying is manageable with the right support in place. Even just having someone to talk to in a safe, non-judgemental space can really help ease the pressure.
Ifafter exploring support and giving yourself a bit of space, you still feel like transferring closer to home would make you happier and healthier that might be the right option for you. Your wellbeing matters more than any “perfect” course. Sometimes, a slightly less ideal academic path is still the right one if it supports your mental health and allows you to thrive.
Whatever you decide, you’re not failing.
All the best and wishing you luck for whatever choice you make,
Tilly LJMU Student
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