please review my personal statement
please could you review my personal statement and tell me if it is good enough to get into top unis like LSE,KCL,UCL,MANCHESTER,LEEDS
xx
xx
(edited 1 month ago)
Reply 1
Delete this immediately. (Though it's probably too late already.)
Reply 2
The student room has a personal statement checker that can help you out with final drafts. you shouldn't post your personal statement publicly because there's a risk of ucas' plagiarism detector flagging your work as copied or someone copying ideas from it.
Some sentences are a bit too long and wordy, especially in the second paragraph. Remove redundant words like "critical and sharp." Remove sentences that just affirm the headings, like "My qualifications and studies have acted as an immense preparation for me." They don't convey any meaning or demonstration of your ability and just take up the word count. Also, check if you mean to say the words you are using. "Significantly" in particular doesn't really make sense in the context you use it in, and I feel like primarily or something like that would work better. "Authoritarian" also is a very strange word choice, especially when talking about teaching.
Some sentences are a bit too long and wordy, especially in the second paragraph. Remove redundant words like "critical and sharp." Remove sentences that just affirm the headings, like "My qualifications and studies have acted as an immense preparation for me." They don't convey any meaning or demonstration of your ability and just take up the word count. Also, check if you mean to say the words you are using. "Significantly" in particular doesn't really make sense in the context you use it in, and I feel like primarily or something like that would work better. "Authoritarian" also is a very strange word choice, especially when talking about teaching.
Original post
by johndoedavisplease could you review my personal statement and tell me if it is good enough to get into top unis like LSE,KCL,UCL,MANCHESTER,LEEDS
xx
xx
Hi there,
Your personal statement has been public on the internet for about 45 minutes. Whilst I can't be certain, it is likely that search engines will have cached the data from this PS and therefore if used on UCAS the whole thing would be flagged for plagiarism. Best advice I can give you is to start again I'm afraid.
MR
Reply 4
4
Original post
by 04MR17Hi there,
Your personal statement has been public on the internet for about 45 minutes. Whilst I can't be certain, it is likely that search engines will have cached the data from this PS and therefore if used on UCAS the whole thing would be flagged for plagiarism. Best advice I can give you is to start again I'm afraid.
MR
Your personal statement has been public on the internet for about 45 minutes. Whilst I can't be certain, it is likely that search engines will have cached the data from this PS and therefore if used on UCAS the whole thing would be flagged for plagiarism. Best advice I can give you is to start again I'm afraid.
MR
seriously
Original post
by johndoedavisseriously
Yes
Sometimes if the user edits it out within 5 or 10 minutes they may be okay but I've previously found personal statements appearing in google within 12 minutes of being public on our site. It is your application so up to you whether you wish to take the risk but if my name was on UCAS I would be rewriting.
You have until January anyway, so that is plenty of time to rewrite. Just think carefully where you decide to put it.
MR
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