worried about fitting in at a london uni
hi! <3
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
Reply 1
14
All London universities have high accoundation costs and long commutes between your accoundation and the universities after your 1st year. If you don't like sitting (more likely standing) on tube trains then London may not be best option for you.
Reply 2
11
Original post
by ringiAll London universities have high accoundation costs and long commutes between your accoundation and the universities after your 1st year. If you don't like sitting (more likely standing) on tube trains then London may not be best option for you.
thanks for the reply, but i am ok with the accommodation costs and the commuting - this was more the social aspect i was anxious about!
Original post
by Anonymoushi! <3
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
There's plenty of normal to ugly looking people at London unis who are awkward and/or unsociable. I most certainly am one...
You're probably experiencing some level of attention bias where those people who are more extroverted and attractive looking both draw more attention and demand more attention by their actions and speech than others who are likely there in similar proportions (if not greater) and simply less noticeable.
Reply 4
I go to QMUL (a born and bred Londoner). Don't worry. There are plenty of people that don't like to drink or party, me included. There are plenty of people who will just put some trousers and a top on for class without trying to make it a fashion parade. Plenty of people you think are extroverts are likely covering up the fact that they don't know or are scared.
There are plenty of societies not centered around drinking and partying. There will be societies and groups that go round London looking at things, which you might enjoy.
It might feel like everyone is an extrovert and has their life together. I promise you, that is not the case.
There are plenty of societies not centered around drinking and partying. There will be societies and groups that go round London looking at things, which you might enjoy.
It might feel like everyone is an extrovert and has their life together. I promise you, that is not the case.
Reply 5
Original post
by Anonymoushi! <3
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
Hey!
I had the exact same reservations as you when I first came to Kingston; although I wasn't studying in central London, I was attending Kingston School of Art and felt slightly intimidated by all of the art students who seemed to have extremely outgoing personalities and fantastic dress sense. I was more of an introvert: I didn't enjoy clubbing, and my ideal night-in was either watching a movie by myself or playing videogames with a few friends.
Nonetheless, within a few weeks of starting my course, I'd met tons of people who were of that exact same mindset as me. I'd joined a gaming society which met twice a week and had taken part in several arts-based evenings hosted by the uni (life drawing, paint and sip, poetry nights). Over time, I even became close friends with lots of the more extroverted students I was initially intimidated by. You'll definitely be able to find introverted friends at uni in London, so try not to worry too much about it. 🙃
Best of luck and hope this helps,
Eve (Kingston Rep).
Reply 6
20
Original post
by li1503thanks for the reply, but i am ok with the accommodation costs and the commuting - this was more the social aspect i was anxious about!
You probably just experienced the over-confident loud voice behaviour of those at private and other selective schools. They do that.
If you want to be with people from more diverse backgrounds, look at Unis like Manchester, Newcastle, Southampton etc - big city but less attractive to 'posh kids'.
Reply 7
Yes the top London universities can be especially challenging that way. I went to a northern red brick for my first degree and then UCL for a masters. UCL is very good uni but it has a very posh side to it with a lot of students from very affluent, glamorous backgrounds whether that's from here in the UK or from abroad. You see a lot of students in very expensive clothing which is fair enough if you can afford it but they can take a bit of getting used to if you're not from that world. At UCL the teaching was excellent but as a uni it wasn't anything like as friendly or easy to make friends as it was at Manchester.
Reply 8
Original post
by Anonymoushi! <3
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
Hiii
Don't worry, there are all types of people in London universities and I would argue that Londoners are actually more introverted than extroverted 😮😁.. You'll be fine and you'll find your people/friend group. But I definitely recommend you to join some societies though because it's easier to make similar friends there than in the lecture halls.
-Sarah (Kingston Rep)
Reply 9
Original post
by Anonymoushi! <3
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
I totally get what you mean, that doesn’t sound rude at all. I didn’t study in London myself, but I did move there when I was 18, so I can relate to what you’re describing. London can feel really overwhelming at first, it’s full of confident, stylish, loud personalities, and it sometimes feels like everyone’s already part of some glamorous crowd. But trust me, that’s just surface-level stuff. Once you actually live there, you realise there’s every kind of person in the mix, extroverts, introverts, and everything in between.
It’s such a big city that there’s genuinely space for everyone. You’ll absolutely be able to find more low-key, like-minded people who don’t want to be out clubbing every night. Loads of students prefer smaller hangouts, coffee, walks, study sessions, museum trips, film nights, that kind of thing. The trick is just finding your pockets of people, which often happens through societies, course groups, or even your accommodation.
And about the whole “everyone looks perfect” thing…I promise you, everyone feels that way at some point. London does attract people with a strong sense of style, but a lot of the confidence you see is just performance. You don’t need to look or act a certain way to belong there. What people actually value are genuine connections, not appearances.
If you love the city and the idea of living there excites you, don’t let the fear of not fitting in put you off. You’ll find your crowd, the people who match your energy and make you feel comfortable being yourself. London’s massive, and that means there’s always a space that fits you perfectly…. even if it takes a bit of time to find it.
Good luck! I hope you go for it and love London as much as I did. Sophie 🙂
Reply 10
Original post
by Anonymoushi! <3
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
im a y13 planning to apply to london unis including UCL, KCL and queen mary.
the courses are great, but i am worried if london is really the best place for me although i really like the city as its beautiful and there's always so many things to do and i want to experience living in london at some point.
but everyone i see at open days seems to be a very certain category of people, if that doesn't sound too rude. i have a feeling london is more for extroverts and people who love going out etc. i dont drink, and clubbing doesn't sound appealing to me at all. also at the risk of sounding superficial, i get heavy imposter syndrome when im at open days because everyone my age seems to be a goddamn supermodel with perfect fashion sense.
will this will be a big problem for me, or will i be able to find more introverted friends like me?
Hi there,
Your worries are understandable, London is a very lively city and it can get hard keeping up with all the social events. However, coming from the experience of an introvert, your university experience doesn't need to be based on drinking and clubbing. I have enjoyed my experience at a London university through exploring cafes and study spaces. Making friends can be hard, especially when you don't know anyone, but I think it's important to remember that the people who are around you are also starting university and will be in the same shoes as you. Open days can be overwhelming but you will definitely not meet your whole cohort. A good idea may be to explore the different societies at the university you are interested in as they also do events which can be fun without the clubbing and drinking aspect.
Good luck,
Sarah
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