The Student Room Group

Should I give him a chance?

So last yr I met this guy on my way home from school on the bus. He goes to a school very close to mine. He sat behind me with his friends. After some time he tapped me on my shoulder and asked me “what is your name” while he was smiling. HE WAS FINE ASF. After that, I told my friends abt him. Somehow someway I found his insta and I followed him. We started chatting and I got his number. We started talking but he was dry. He was a bit interested but also dry. I felt like something was wrong. He asked me if I had a bf and I said no and outta nowhere he asked me another day if I ever kissed someone. I found that a bit weird yk cuz I wouldn’t ask that out of nowhere. He then asked me that he wanted to meet me. I came up with an excuse abt me not wanting to hang out with boys. BTW I was 16 at that time and now I’m 17. And the moment I said what I said, he became even more dry. I have a friend that goes his skl and she texted me a day after and she told me he asked a girl out, but she said no. I was so upset. She then asked him “what do you think abt A (ie me)” and he said “she is not my type” with an uninterested face. Then, I confronted him by messaging him. Then I blocked him. All of this happened October 2024. Fast forward, I completely forgot about him. We come to July, and I see an unknown number texting me saying “hii”. I was like who is this and he told me it’s him. We started chatting for a very short time. I was dry towards him because I completely lost feelings. Then in August he texted me again, and he was talking to me about how school is starting and that how this is our last yr of secondary school. I agreed with him and day by day we started talking more. One day, we were having a convo then I asked him “what music do u listen to” and he started naming artists. I then said “what’s ur type” (I meant it as in music) and this guy responds with “ur my type”. I was like “r u mad wdym” and he said “yes, ur my type. Why wld I lie”. I didn’t flirt back. Btw since we started talking again he asked me 1000 times if we can link. I always came up with an excuse. Then I just told him that I don’t like hanging out with guys cuz I’m t used to it. He was respectful and backed off.

Last night he sent me a reel saying “if something bad ever happens to u, I will save u (cuz I’m Batman) with a cute cat wearing a Batman mask😂. I found that cute, but I just liked the message. This guy is soo desperate. Like I feel like he actually likes me, not like last time.

I posted this because I wanna know what to do next. Should I keep talking to him? I mean I haven’t seen any red flags for the past 2 months now, and I feel he is genuinely interested, but I just want to hear opinions.

Reply 1

If you have aspirations to go to uni, and to get to the most prestigious uni you can, then you should put him on the back burner until July 2026. As it sounds like there's too much of a chance that he will be too much of a distraction and too much of time-drain. With the possibility of him dumping you at exam time and leaving you too distraught to focus well on your revision.

If you intend starting the money earning part of your life without going to uni, you should meet him for a date in a public place, and take things from there. You might get on OK with him. You might not.

Please bear in mind that you should not expect any level of maturity from him, because he's still a school-child. And therefore you should expect him to inject liberal amounts of drama into any relationship you have with him.

Reply 2

Original post
by Dunnig Kruger
If you have aspirations to go to uni, and to get to the most prestigious uni you can, then you should put him on the back burner until July 2026. As it sounds like there's too much of a chance that he will be too much of a distraction and too much of time-drain. With the possibility of him dumping you at exam time and leaving you too distraught to focus well on your revision.
If you intend starting the money earning part of your life without going to uni, you should meet him for a date in a public place, and take things from there. You might get on OK with him. You might not.
Please bear in mind that you should not expect any level of maturity from him, because he's still a school-child. And therefore you should expect him to inject liberal amounts of drama into any relationship you have with him.

Do u think he became more mature? I mean I felt it.

Reply 3

We're all getting more mature all the time.

He appears to be maturing from a low baseline. And still has a long way to go.

Balance of probabilities says that if getting the very best A level results you can is important to you, then you should defer him to July 2026. Because there's too much chance that spending time with him will decrease one or more of your grades.

When you're free next summer and when you're a student or earning a living you should be looking to fill your boots with romantic involvement.

Reply 4

Original post
by Dunnig Kruger
We're all getting more mature all the time.
He appears to be maturing from a low baseline. And still has a long way to go.
Balance of probabilities says that if getting the very best A level results you can is important to you, then you should defer him to July 2026. Because there's too much chance that spending time with him will decrease one or more of your grades.
When you're free next summer and when you're a student or earning a living you should be looking to fill your boots with romantic involvement.
Is it a red flag that he wants us to link so baaaadd?

Reply 5

Yes it's a red flag.

Reply 6

Original post
by Anonymous
Is it a red flag that he wants us to link so baaaadd?

Go for it what you got to lose

Reply 7

Original post
by Goodlife Girl
Go for it what you got to lose
Idk gnggggggggg

Reply 8

As someone with experience with a guy like this, he’s been weird once so he will be weird again. Don’t give him the light of day just because he Is acting different and like he likes you cause trust me it it always ends the same. Choose a guy that KNOWS you and will treat you the same no matter what. Pick a guy that shows he wants and respects you. Don’t let him comeback and then let him act up, you deserve to be respected.

Reply 9

Original post
by Anonymous
So last yr I met this guy on my way home from school on the bus. He goes to a school very close to mine. He sat behind me with his friends. After some time he tapped me on my shoulder and asked me “what is your name” while he was smiling. HE WAS FINE ASF. After that, I told my friends abt him. Somehow someway I found his insta and I followed him. We started chatting and I got his number. We started talking but he was dry. He was a bit interested but also dry. I felt like something was wrong. He asked me if I had a bf and I said no and outta nowhere he asked me another day if I ever kissed someone. I found that a bit weird yk cuz I wouldn’t ask that out of nowhere. He then asked me that he wanted to meet me. I came up with an excuse abt me not wanting to hang out with boys. BTW I was 16 at that time and now I’m 17. And the moment I said what I said, he became even more dry. I have a friend that goes his skl and she texted me a day after and she told me he asked a girl out, but she said no. I was so upset. She then asked him “what do you think abt A (ie me)” and he said “she is not my type” with an uninterested face. Then, I confronted him by messaging him. Then I blocked him. All of this happened October 2024. Fast forward, I completely forgot about him. We come to July, and I see an unknown number texting me saying “hii”. I was like who is this and he told me it’s him. We started chatting for a very short time. I was dry towards him because I completely lost feelings. Then in August he texted me again, and he was talking to me about how school is starting and that how this is our last yr of secondary school. I agreed with him and day by day we started talking more. One day, we were having a convo then I asked him “what music do u listen to” and he started naming artists. I then said “what’s ur type” (I meant it as in music) and this guy responds with “ur my type”. I was like “r u mad wdym” and he said “yes, ur my type. Why wld I lie”. I didn’t flirt back. Btw since we started talking again he asked me 1000 times if we can link. I always came up with an excuse. Then I just told him that I don’t like hanging out with guys cuz I’m t used to it. He was respectful and backed off.
Last night he sent me a reel saying “if something bad ever happens to u, I will save u (cuz I’m Batman) with a cute cat wearing a Batman mask😂. I found that cute, but I just liked the message. This guy is soo desperate. Like I feel like he actually likes me, not like last time.
I posted this because I wanna know what to do next. Should I keep talking to him? I mean I haven’t seen any red flags for the past 2 months now, and I feel he is genuinely interested, but I just want to hear opinions.

I don't think he feels right for you and too young. There are plenty of other guys out there who might be a bit more romantic and good fun. I would keep looking.

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