In the Latin translation test (or the Greek for that matter), what is the aim of the translation? Is it 1) to make a beautiful translation that preserves the meaning and beauty of the original, worth publishing? or 2) to exhibit the student's thorough understanding of the original? or 3) to render the original in English while keeping as close as possible to the original? Are there any guidelines?
I took a practice test online (the practice test on this page), and many questions arose as a result of there not being any instructions, and I think many others will have the same questions, so I hope that replies can be of use to everybody. I will paste the original texts below, followed by my translation, followed by my questions, followed by a discussion of the translations and of what led to my questions, the answer to which I hope will help me and others to be able to approach the tasks correctly. I tried to preserve the literal meaning in the translations, without caring about polishing my English, and to complete it as quickly as possible. I found that I understood the original almost all of the time, and at least understood the spirit of it when I didn't know what the author was aiming at with a certain expression, but that it was quite hard to express it in English, especially good English that would have been similar to a professional translation.
Exercise 1, poetry translation:
Praetor ab Illyricis venit modo, Cynthia, terris,
maxima praeda tibi, maxima cura mihi.
Non potuit saxo vitam posuisse Cerauno?
A, Neptune, tibi qualia dona darem!
Nunc sine me plena fiunt convivia mensa,
nunc sine me tota ianua nocte patet.
Quare, si sapis, oblatas ne desere messes
et stolidum pleno vellere carpe pecus;
deinde, ubi consumpto restabit munere pauper,
dic alias iterum naviget Illyrias!
Cynthia non sequitur fasces nec curat honores:
semper amatorum ponderat una sinus;
semper in Oceanum mittit me quaerere gemmas,
et iubet ex ipsa tollere dona Tyro.
My translation:
An attorney general came just now, Cynthia, from the Illyrian lands,
A great booty for you, a great nuisance for me.
Could he not have lost his life on the cliffs of Acroceraunia?
Ah, Neptune, what presents I would have given you for that!
Now feasts with full tables are held without me,
Now the door is open all night without me.
Wherefore, if you be wise, do not decline the harvests offered to you,
But do pick the dull cattle with their full fleece;
Then, when after his gifts are used up he is become poor,
Tell him to go to some other Illyria!
Cynthia is not attracted by power, nor cares about dignities:
The purse of the lovers is always what prevails;
She always sends me into the ocean in order to search for gemstones,
And tells me from such a gemstone to construct gifts for the city of Tyre.
Exercise 2, prose translation:
Velleius contrasts Scipio and Mummius, two generals with very different attitudes towards culture. Diversi imperatoribus mores, diversa fuerunt studia: nam Scipio tam elegans liberalium studiorum omnisque doctrinae et auctor et admirator fuit, ut Polybium Panaetiumque, excellentes ingenio viros, domi militiaeque secum habuerit. Nemo hoc Scipione elegantius intervalla negotiorum otio dispunxit semperque aut belli aut pacis serviit artibus: semper inter arma ac studia versatus aut corpus periculis aut animum disciplinis exercuit. Mummius tam rudis fuit, ut capta Corintho, *** maximorum artificum perfectas manibus statuas in Italiam portandas curaret, conducentibus praediceret, si eas perdidissent, novas reddituros esse.
My translation:
The generals had different manners, and different areas of interest: for Scipio was such a discerning both creator and admirer of liberal arts and all learning, that he always had [the works of] Polybius and Panaetius, men of eminent genius, at home and in the military, close at hand. Nobody more elegantly separated the intervals of work with spare time than this Scipio, and he always devoted himself to the art of either war or peace: Always dwelling in the midst of wars and studies, he either exercised his body with dangers, or his mind with studies. Mummius [on the other hand] was so uncultivated, that, after he had captured Corinth, when he was overseeing the transportation into Italy of statues made by hand by the greatest artisans, he declared to the contractors, that they would have to give new ones back if they broke any.
Questions:
These questions are about the ideal translation, i.e. what the goal of the test is.
• Must the translation be verbatim, i.e. a one-to-one correspondence, or is it allowed to add more words, that were not in the original, in order to explain the context? Must it follow the sentence structure and punctuation of the original as closely as possible?
• Is it allowed to extrapolate from the information in the original, and describe in the translation what is happening more at large?
• Can one use metaphoric language in the translation, fill it out with similar things in the same vein as the author wrote in, etc.? As in the way that freer translations are made.
• Must the the translation be a polished text that is supposed to be as presentable to the reader as the original, as a professional translation would be, or is it better to make a more encompassing explanation, to show that one has understood the original at a deeper lever and read between the lines?
• Is it advisable to use more educated or obscure synonyms that are closer in meaning and etymology to the original, e.g. 'interval' for 'intervallum' rather than 'break', or will the assessors think one doesn't know the specific meaning of the Latin words in English? Many Latin words could be changed for its English equivalent (e.g. 'stolid' for 'stolidus' etc.), while retaining a much closer correspondence to the original, but would this be too lazy?
• Would it be better or worse to make the translation extremely poetic and convoluted, like Shakespeare or Keats, i.e. to infuse some poetic spirit into it? To make it gramatically and lexically obscure, while being correct according to Shakespeare's standards?
• Will better English and better rhythm in the translation at the expence of losing some of the meaning give more points, or better accuracy? Is it very important that the translation be very clear, or can it be as picturesque as the original?
• During the real test, I intend to render as much as the poem as possible in some English poetic meter, if there be time left at the end. Is it allowed to change the structure of the poem, e.g. writing two lines of English poetry for one line of the original?
Discussion:
• In modern governments, there is no exact equivalent to a praetor, and the closest thing I could think of in the moment was an attorney general. Would it be better to leave it as praetor, or would it be considered lazy? What would the optimal translation be? Could I leave it as praetor, and explain in parenteses what the office involves?
• 'Praeda' implies that he is going to be her prey, but strictly speaking means booty captured in war. Which is preferable?
• A more pleasant-sounding translation of the first verse would be "A praetor, Cynthia, from Illyria is new arrived". May tenses and grammar be changed, while preserving meaning, or will they think one doesn't understand the original's grammar?
• It does not appear from my translation what Neptune has to do with the praetor's settling. Should that be explained?
• I think 'cura' in this context means a source of anxiety. Is 'nuisance' close enough?
• If 'plena mensa' refers to the food on the table, and not the fact that every place at the table is occupied, could one instead say 'a sumptuous feast'? Or must the translation include every last detail?
• Could the image of the door being open all night, the light shining out into the night, and people laughing inside, be portrayed in the translation, 1) to show one's understanding of the scene, and 2) to make the translation more agreeable? I have seen such things sometimes in English translations.
• The remainder is also mostly questions about word-by-word translations vs. what captures the actual sense.