boyfriend issues pls help
And this boy and I were together this time last year, up until January, when we broke up. We were on and off for months until we called it off in August. We had run into each other a couple of weeks ago and started to talk again. This time last year, when we were together, he had trouble taking no for an answer with certain activities he was trying to push onto me. So yesterday we had hung out casually, I thought. Everything was normal and whatever. We both are very touchy with each other, so I didn't find that weird when he started to get more touchy. When he left and asked for a hug, just from the hug I knew he was gonna try smth. He kissed me after and tried going further into making out, and I kept saying no, but he just wouldn't stop. He tried kissing my neck and all this stuff, and eventually he stopped, but it took him a good 5 minutes. When we started to talk a few weeks ago, he said he had changed and that he wasn't "lustful" anymore. He hasn't said anything about it, so I don't know if he thinks he did nothing wrong or im just looking at it differently. What do I do?
Reply 1
You were the victim of a sexual assault. When anyone says "No", no means no. No ifs, no butts.
If you have a video or audio recording of the incident, that would be good evidence to get him convicted.
It would make sense for you to take reasonable precautions against you becoming a victim of sexual assault, or something even more serious in the future. Such as you cutting off all contact with him. Telling all your friends what he did.
There's a very high chance that in his mind, he did nothing wrong. And that in his mind, you were in the wrong for not accepting his advances. That's how bullies minds work. Victim blaming.
He's probably lying or being over complimentary about himself when he says he isn't lustful any more. Being lustful is fine. It's a natural emotion to feel. Where he's lacking is in his self discipline and his lack of empathy and him being excessively self-centred.
This adds up to him being the sort of guy that would be a nightmare to live with, even if he totally fixed his propensity to sexually assault.
If you have a video or audio recording of the incident, that would be good evidence to get him convicted.
It would make sense for you to take reasonable precautions against you becoming a victim of sexual assault, or something even more serious in the future. Such as you cutting off all contact with him. Telling all your friends what he did.
There's a very high chance that in his mind, he did nothing wrong. And that in his mind, you were in the wrong for not accepting his advances. That's how bullies minds work. Victim blaming.
He's probably lying or being over complimentary about himself when he says he isn't lustful any more. Being lustful is fine. It's a natural emotion to feel. Where he's lacking is in his self discipline and his lack of empathy and him being excessively self-centred.
This adds up to him being the sort of guy that would be a nightmare to live with, even if he totally fixed his propensity to sexually assault.
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