Friends from my culture

Hey everyone,
I’m 17 and moved to the UK when I was 9. I’ve got lots of great friends here and I am very grateful for them and wouldn’t swap them for the world! They’re my everything and I do everything with them! , but none of them share my cultural background they come from various backgrounds and cultures which is awesome !

My parents aren’t very social , the few friends they have either don’t have kids or their kids are way older than me ( I am talking like old as in their 30s) so I’ve basically grown up without any real connection to people from my own culture outside of family.

Lately I’ve been feeling kind of weird about it. Like, I love my life here and I’m grateful for my friends, but I sometimes feel disconnected ,like I’m not fully part of either world. I don’t want to lose touch with my roots, but I also don’t know where to start meeting people who understand that side of me. Like I like pretty niche singers , films , cultural stuff from my culture and no one gets me.

Lately, I’ve been feeling kind of sad about it. When I see people on Instagram hanging out with friends from their own culture, it makes me feel like I’m missing something. Sometimes when I randomly hear kids in the street speaking my (really rare) language, I want to just go up and say hi , but I know that would be weird, haha 🥲

The city I live in is super multicultural, but somehow there’s basically no one from my own background.( or that I know of, my school has like one person from my culture ) It’s a strange feeling I love my friends and my life here, but I also feel disconnected from a part of who I am.

Has anyone else been through something similar? How did you find a sense of community or balance between cultures? Any advice or places to meet people with similar backgrounds would really help.( not online , my parents are against meeting people online as it can be sketchy sometimes!) .

Thanks :smile:

Reply 1

UniofLawstudent2

Official Rep

Original post

by Anonymous

Hey everyone,
I’m 17 and moved to the UK when I was 9. I’ve got lots of great friends here and I am very grateful for them and wouldn’t swap them for the world! They’re my everything and I do everything with them! , but none of them share my cultural background they come from various backgrounds and cultures which is awesome !
My parents aren’t very social , the few friends they have either don’t have kids or their kids are way older than me ( I am talking like old as in their 30s) so I’ve basically grown up without any real connection to people from my own culture outside of family.
Lately I’ve been feeling kind of weird about it. Like, I love my life here and I’m grateful for my friends, but I sometimes feel disconnected ,like I’m not fully part of either world. I don’t want to lose touch with my roots, but I also don’t know where to start meeting people who understand that side of me. Like I like pretty niche singers , films , cultural stuff from my culture and no one gets me.
Lately, I’ve been feeling kind of sad about it. When I see people on Instagram hanging out with friends from their own culture, it makes me feel like I’m missing something. Sometimes when I randomly hear kids in the street speaking my (really rare) language, I want to just go up and say hi , but I know that would be weird, haha 🥲
The city I live in is super multicultural, but somehow there’s basically no one from my own background.( or that I know of, my school has like one person from my culture ) It’s a strange feeling I love my friends and my life here, but I also feel disconnected from a part of who I am.
Has anyone else been through something similar? How did you find a sense of community or balance between cultures? Any advice or places to meet people with similar backgrounds would really help.( not online , my parents are against meeting people online as it can be sketchy sometimes!) .
Thanks :smile:

Hey!
What you’re feeling is completely valid and actually really common for people who’ve grown up between cultures, especially when they moved when they were younger.
It can feel confusing when you love your friends and life here but still feel like a part of you is missing, longing for a deeper connection to your own roots and culture. You’re definitely not alone in that.

Since you’re 17 and your parents arn't keen on you messaging strangers on the internet, there are a few ways you can start reconnecting with your culture and meeting people who might share it in a safer manner.
You could look into local youth clubs, community centres, or language/cultural schools that run weekend or after-school activities. Even if they’re small or family-oriented, they can be a great place to meet others who understand that side of you.
This will require you to search online for events related to your culture in your region.
While it may feel uncomfortable rocking up to any of these events, it's a key skill you need to develop regardless, as you enter the adult world.
Obviously, I cannot ask for any identifying information, so I cannot do it directly for you, but you should get the idea on how I would find opportunities in your posistion.

Another good option is to get involved in volunteering or events that celebrate diversity or cultural exchange, things like cultural festivals, local fairs, or community projects often bring together people from all sorts of backgrounds. You could also ask your school if they know of any cultural societies, exchange programmes, or mentoring schemes in your area, they often have connections you might not know about.

And even though your friends might not share your background, you could still share parts of your culture with them, show them your favourite films, music, or food. It’s a lovely way to keep that connection alive and to help them understand you more deeply.

Finding “your people” can take time, but you’re already on the right path by being open about what you’re feeling and wanting to explore it. It’s completely okay to belong to more than one world, both can be part of who you are. 😁

Best of luck,
Alfred,
Ulaw.

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

Original post

by Anonymous

Hey everyone,
I’m 17 and moved to the UK when I was 9. I’ve got lots of great friends here and I am very grateful for them and wouldn’t swap them for the world! They’re my everything and I do everything with them! , but none of them share my cultural background they come from various backgrounds and cultures which is awesome !
My parents aren’t very social , the few friends they have either don’t have kids or their kids are way older than me ( I am talking like old as in their 30s) so I’ve basically grown up without any real connection to people from my own culture outside of family.
Lately I’ve been feeling kind of weird about it. Like, I love my life here and I’m grateful for my friends, but I sometimes feel disconnected ,like I’m not fully part of either world. I don’t want to lose touch with my roots, but I also don’t know where to start meeting people who understand that side of me. Like I like pretty niche singers , films , cultural stuff from my culture and no one gets me.
Lately, I’ve been feeling kind of sad about it. When I see people on Instagram hanging out with friends from their own culture, it makes me feel like I’m missing something. Sometimes when I randomly hear kids in the street speaking my (really rare) language, I want to just go up and say hi , but I know that would be weird, haha 🥲
The city I live in is super multicultural, but somehow there’s basically no one from my own background.( or that I know of, my school has like one person from my culture ) It’s a strange feeling I love my friends and my life here, but I also feel disconnected from a part of who I am.
Has anyone else been through something similar? How did you find a sense of community or balance between cultures? Any advice or places to meet people with similar backgrounds would really help.( not online , my parents are against meeting people online as it can be sketchy sometimes!) .
Thanks :smile:

Sure, its a common thing for people living in a culture different to their own. I'm from China, there are lots of Chinese at my school and of course the Sunday Chinese schools, however I'm from a rather niche area of China rather than Hong Kong, Shanghai, Fujian and other southern areas, the culture is rather different and so is the dialect which means I tend to not hang out with other Chinese people.
Try and not focus too much on what culture people are from, and just make friends with people at school, I also like sort of niche songs and movies but it still works out ok, as me and my friends aren't even that into music or tv and the culture barrier sort of fades.
If you really want to meet people with your culture, try and find people in school or around where you live with a similar culture from near yours and try and find the similarities.

Reply 3

Kingston Zhi En

Official Rep

Original post

by Anonymous

Hey everyone,
I’m 17 and moved to the UK when I was 9. I’ve got lots of great friends here and I am very grateful for them and wouldn’t swap them for the world! They’re my everything and I do everything with them! , but none of them share my cultural background they come from various backgrounds and cultures which is awesome !
My parents aren’t very social , the few friends they have either don’t have kids or their kids are way older than me ( I am talking like old as in their 30s) so I’ve basically grown up without any real connection to people from my own culture outside of family.
Lately I’ve been feeling kind of weird about it. Like, I love my life here and I’m grateful for my friends, but I sometimes feel disconnected ,like I’m not fully part of either world. I don’t want to lose touch with my roots, but I also don’t know where to start meeting people who understand that side of me. Like I like pretty niche singers , films , cultural stuff from my culture and no one gets me.
Lately, I’ve been feeling kind of sad about it. When I see people on Instagram hanging out with friends from their own culture, it makes me feel like I’m missing something. Sometimes when I randomly hear kids in the street speaking my (really rare) language, I want to just go up and say hi , but I know that would be weird, haha 🥲
The city I live in is super multicultural, but somehow there’s basically no one from my own background.( or that I know of, my school has like one person from my culture ) It’s a strange feeling I love my friends and my life here, but I also feel disconnected from a part of who I am.
Has anyone else been through something similar? How did you find a sense of community or balance between cultures? Any advice or places to meet people with similar backgrounds would really help.( not online , my parents are against meeting people online as it can be sketchy sometimes!) .
Thanks :smile:

Hi there,
as an international student moving away from home and adjusting to a different culture definitely took time. I was also in a similar situation with no one from my culture and it took a while making friends.
At a college or university level there are cultural societies that bring together people from a similar background and culture 🤗 Maybe you can consider looking into cultural societies or language learning groups in the future 🙂
I hope this helps.

Zhi En
(Kingston Student Rep.)