Muslim Brothers and Sisters Please
Poll
Would you consider a arrange marriage?
Am I the only one to think, loving someone and giving your trust to someone that you completely don’t know as a result of arrange marriage is difficult and may never work?
Reply 1
Alsalam Alaikum,
To start off, i am not a scholar and you would have to do your own research on this. Everything i have said is based on my knowledge on the subject and may not be completely accurate.
I completely agree with you on this matter. But we have a time period where you have time to get to know your future spouse which is the engagement period. after your engaged, even if its arranged, you can call, or meet up with (in the presence of a mahram) the person where you get to know each other until the nikkah date is decided. In this period you can decide whether you think the two of you are fit for each other or not and then you can decide whether you want to move forward with that person or not. Obviously this is what islam allows but in some cultures that is frowned upon and in some cultures this getting to know each other period isn't permitted but according to my knowledge, correct me if i am wrong, in Islam this getting to know each other period is allowed.
To start off, i am not a scholar and you would have to do your own research on this. Everything i have said is based on my knowledge on the subject and may not be completely accurate.
I completely agree with you on this matter. But we have a time period where you have time to get to know your future spouse which is the engagement period. after your engaged, even if its arranged, you can call, or meet up with (in the presence of a mahram) the person where you get to know each other until the nikkah date is decided. In this period you can decide whether you think the two of you are fit for each other or not and then you can decide whether you want to move forward with that person or not. Obviously this is what islam allows but in some cultures that is frowned upon and in some cultures this getting to know each other period isn't permitted but according to my knowledge, correct me if i am wrong, in Islam this getting to know each other period is allowed.
Reply 2
I forgot to add that in Islam, arranged marriages are encouraged, but they are not meant to force love instantly. The Prophet ﷺ emphasized kindness, patience, and mutual respect between spouses. Love in Islam isn’t always the starting point; it’s something that grows over time when both partners fulfill their responsibilities, communicate honestly, and support each other. So, while it may feel difficult at first, with patience, trust in Allah, and sincere effort, it can work and even become a source of deep love and comfort.
Reply 3
18
Original post
by AnonymousAlsalam Alaikum,
To start off, i am not a scholar and you would have to do your own research on this. Everything i have said is based on my knowledge on the subject and may not be completely accurate.
I completely agree with you on this matter. But we have a time period where you have time to get to know your future spouse which is the engagement period. after your engaged, even if its arranged, you can call, or meet up with (in the presence of a mahram) the person where you get to know each other until the nikkah date is decided. In this period you can decide whether you think the two of you are fit for each other or not and then you can decide whether you want to move forward with that person or not. Obviously this is what islam allows but in some cultures that is frowned upon and in some cultures this getting to know each other period isn't permitted but according to my knowledge, correct me if i am wrong, in Islam this getting to know each other period is allowed.
To start off, i am not a scholar and you would have to do your own research on this. Everything i have said is based on my knowledge on the subject and may not be completely accurate.
I completely agree with you on this matter. But we have a time period where you have time to get to know your future spouse which is the engagement period. after your engaged, even if its arranged, you can call, or meet up with (in the presence of a mahram) the person where you get to know each other until the nikkah date is decided. In this period you can decide whether you think the two of you are fit for each other or not and then you can decide whether you want to move forward with that person or not. Obviously this is what islam allows but in some cultures that is frowned upon and in some cultures this getting to know each other period isn't permitted but according to my knowledge, correct me if i am wrong, in Islam this getting to know each other period is allowed.
Salaam I wanted your opinion we’ve blocked each other. I have unblocked her anyways is there any minimal hope Allah reunites us? For her to be my naseeb. I am still in love with her and I love her so much. I just want to correct things and set things straight and right again.
Reply 4
Wa alaykum assalam. I can see that you still care about her deeply, and feelings like that don’t just disappear. In Islam, nothing is impossible for Allah. If she is written for you, even mountains could move and you would still end up together. But if Allah has written another path for you, then even if you chase this with your whole heart, it may not happen.
What matters now is intention. If you truly feel there were mistakes and things left unresolved, you’re allowed to make sincere du’a, ask Allah for clarity, and reflect on what you would do differently. But at the same time, you also need to accept that she may not come back. Both hope and acceptance can exist at the same time.
Keep your heart soft, don’t hold anger, don't force anything, and just ask Allah: ‘If she is good for my deen, my heart, and my life, bring her back to me. And if not, then remove this attachment from my heart in the most gentle way.’ Whatever is written for you will come with ease, never with begging or chasing.
What matters now is intention. If you truly feel there were mistakes and things left unresolved, you’re allowed to make sincere du’a, ask Allah for clarity, and reflect on what you would do differently. But at the same time, you also need to accept that she may not come back. Both hope and acceptance can exist at the same time.
Keep your heart soft, don’t hold anger, don't force anything, and just ask Allah: ‘If she is good for my deen, my heart, and my life, bring her back to me. And if not, then remove this attachment from my heart in the most gentle way.’ Whatever is written for you will come with ease, never with begging or chasing.
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