LNAT LAW essay first attempt any feedback much appreciated.
first attempt, completed under exam conditions- timed, unseen. any help much appreciated
Wearing a burkha in Western countries is just as offensive as wearing a bikini in Arab countries. Do you agree?
In a cultural landscape seemingly defined by our differences, comparing the implications of our societies rules can lead to highly controversial discussions surrounding religion, sex, and misogyny. To question and attempt to measure “offensiveness”, we must first look at the reasoning behind both the offending, and why people may feel offended.
Take the bikini, in the western world, a staple of any trip to the beach. The clothing is so inherently normalised that it would look weird to the Westerner if they were to see a woman on the beach, on a sunny day, wearing anything but one. Despite its revealing nature, there would be no judgement from the average person in the West, much less so than if they were seen wearing a bra and underwear. The hypocrisy of the West can already be seen here, if someone wore nothing but a bra in public, they would face immediate shame, labelled a (no swears allowed). Wear a bikini though, and you are not shamed with such grotesque labels. It is evident that the wearing of bikinis in the west is slightly out of line with their own societal norms, nonetheless no great harm is caused by it.
So, why would the same behaviour be offensive in an Arab country? Would they too not understand that certain rules apply to the beach? Why shouldn’t they enjoy the sight of a bikini? In Arab countries, an overwhelming majority of the population are Muslim, thus their societal norms reflect this. Islamic law suggests that women should be extremely modest, showing no body. Some subcultures require the covering of everything but the eyes, by wearing the burkha. Others allow for just a hijab, others do not require any head covering. Those who wear the Burkha do so out of devotion to Islam. Those who wear a bikini do so out of devotion to tan lines. Based on Islamic views, it is no shock to imagine that wearing clothing as revealing as a bikini, similar to underwear, would be considered highly offensive. To go against the fundamental rules of Islam would be seen as utter disrespect, seemingly with no requirement. There is no need to wear a bikini, plenty of alternatives are available to wear to the beach. Why not wear a swimming T-Shirt? Whether or not you agree with Islamic Law is irrelevant, it is crystal clear to see why offense would be taken. Not only social, but too religious rules have been violated.
The burkha, a religious item of clothing, covering all but the eyes. Typically worn by Islamic women, as part of their devotion. Why could wearing one in the Western world be deemed as offensive? Firstly, it rejects societal norms, the majority of Western countries are Christian countries. However, is going against societal norms always offensive? If i wake up, and put on a pair of yellow trousers, instead of my typical blue jeans, this rejects societal norms, but is it inherently offensive? There is no law against yellow trousers, the Bible does not require blue trousers, the Bible does not speak against my yellow trousers. It seems, from a religious aspect, my yellow trousers are perfectly acceptable. This too is the case with the burkha, the Bible doesn’t suggest we should wear the burkha, yet it too does not reject it. Still, many would have an objection to the wearing of the burkha. Many argue that it violates the rights of women and forces them to conform to strict rules that violate the Westerns view of equality. While, in my opinion, many aspects of Islamic culture are oppressive towards women, I am unsure that it can be proved this is one of them. Unless given reason to believe otherwise, we should expect that these women are fully consenting in their wearing of the burkha, if this is the case, who are the Westerners to tell her she cant wear it? How would a Mormon feel if they were expected to remove their under layers when they entered an Arab country?
In each case, the offense seems to be caused by cultural differing’s. It is not normal to show so much body in Arab countries, it is not normal to cover so much of the face in the West. As a member of Western society, my cultural expectations are inherently bias. When measuring the offensiveness this should not come into consideration however. Since Christianity and Islam are the two leading religions in the West and in Arab countries respectively, their rules must come into consideration. The Quran suggests that women should not show much of their body in public. The Bible makes no such comment on the bhurka. Therefore, to the people of each society, wearing a bikini is more offensive. The direct violation means that those who follow Islam will feel much more disrespected than Christians should by the burkha. Bikinis are not a part of Christianity, they are simply a result of pop culture across the west over time. Therefore, to not wear a bikini is not an ask that disrespects Christianity, asking someone to remove the burkha is, however. Overall it is clear that despite potential concerns about the treatment of the women in both cases, it is still more offensive to violate Islamic law and wear a bikini.
Wearing a burkha in Western countries is just as offensive as wearing a bikini in Arab countries. Do you agree?
In a cultural landscape seemingly defined by our differences, comparing the implications of our societies rules can lead to highly controversial discussions surrounding religion, sex, and misogyny. To question and attempt to measure “offensiveness”, we must first look at the reasoning behind both the offending, and why people may feel offended.
Take the bikini, in the western world, a staple of any trip to the beach. The clothing is so inherently normalised that it would look weird to the Westerner if they were to see a woman on the beach, on a sunny day, wearing anything but one. Despite its revealing nature, there would be no judgement from the average person in the West, much less so than if they were seen wearing a bra and underwear. The hypocrisy of the West can already be seen here, if someone wore nothing but a bra in public, they would face immediate shame, labelled a (no swears allowed). Wear a bikini though, and you are not shamed with such grotesque labels. It is evident that the wearing of bikinis in the west is slightly out of line with their own societal norms, nonetheless no great harm is caused by it.
So, why would the same behaviour be offensive in an Arab country? Would they too not understand that certain rules apply to the beach? Why shouldn’t they enjoy the sight of a bikini? In Arab countries, an overwhelming majority of the population are Muslim, thus their societal norms reflect this. Islamic law suggests that women should be extremely modest, showing no body. Some subcultures require the covering of everything but the eyes, by wearing the burkha. Others allow for just a hijab, others do not require any head covering. Those who wear the Burkha do so out of devotion to Islam. Those who wear a bikini do so out of devotion to tan lines. Based on Islamic views, it is no shock to imagine that wearing clothing as revealing as a bikini, similar to underwear, would be considered highly offensive. To go against the fundamental rules of Islam would be seen as utter disrespect, seemingly with no requirement. There is no need to wear a bikini, plenty of alternatives are available to wear to the beach. Why not wear a swimming T-Shirt? Whether or not you agree with Islamic Law is irrelevant, it is crystal clear to see why offense would be taken. Not only social, but too religious rules have been violated.
The burkha, a religious item of clothing, covering all but the eyes. Typically worn by Islamic women, as part of their devotion. Why could wearing one in the Western world be deemed as offensive? Firstly, it rejects societal norms, the majority of Western countries are Christian countries. However, is going against societal norms always offensive? If i wake up, and put on a pair of yellow trousers, instead of my typical blue jeans, this rejects societal norms, but is it inherently offensive? There is no law against yellow trousers, the Bible does not require blue trousers, the Bible does not speak against my yellow trousers. It seems, from a religious aspect, my yellow trousers are perfectly acceptable. This too is the case with the burkha, the Bible doesn’t suggest we should wear the burkha, yet it too does not reject it. Still, many would have an objection to the wearing of the burkha. Many argue that it violates the rights of women and forces them to conform to strict rules that violate the Westerns view of equality. While, in my opinion, many aspects of Islamic culture are oppressive towards women, I am unsure that it can be proved this is one of them. Unless given reason to believe otherwise, we should expect that these women are fully consenting in their wearing of the burkha, if this is the case, who are the Westerners to tell her she cant wear it? How would a Mormon feel if they were expected to remove their under layers when they entered an Arab country?
In each case, the offense seems to be caused by cultural differing’s. It is not normal to show so much body in Arab countries, it is not normal to cover so much of the face in the West. As a member of Western society, my cultural expectations are inherently bias. When measuring the offensiveness this should not come into consideration however. Since Christianity and Islam are the two leading religions in the West and in Arab countries respectively, their rules must come into consideration. The Quran suggests that women should not show much of their body in public. The Bible makes no such comment on the bhurka. Therefore, to the people of each society, wearing a bikini is more offensive. The direct violation means that those who follow Islam will feel much more disrespected than Christians should by the burkha. Bikinis are not a part of Christianity, they are simply a result of pop culture across the west over time. Therefore, to not wear a bikini is not an ask that disrespects Christianity, asking someone to remove the burkha is, however. Overall it is clear that despite potential concerns about the treatment of the women in both cases, it is still more offensive to violate Islamic law and wear a bikini.
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Reply 1
There are a lot of non-sequiturs in this. 'The Bible makes no such comment on the bhurka.' Of course it doesn't given when and where it was written - there were no Muslims then!
Weak argument imho.
Weak argument imho.
Reply 2
Original post
by Muttley79There are a lot of non-sequiturs in this. 'The Bible makes no such comment on the bhurka.' Of course it doesn't given when and where it was written - there were no Muslims then!
Weak argument imho.
Weak argument imho.
well yeah that’s kinda the entire point. of course the bible isn’t going to disagree with the bhurka, as it is not an important part of christianity at all.
Reply 3
Original post
by calummackenzie08well yeah that’s kinda the entire point. of course the bible isn’t going to disagree with the bhurka, as it is not an important part of christianity at all.
It's a weak argument though no-one had seen a burkha to object to it.
Reply 4
Original post
by Muttley79It's a weak argument though no-one had seen a burkha to object to it.
yes but if the concept of it were so offensive, would some sort of prohibition against the covering of the face not be in the bible?
Reply 5
Original post
by calummackenzie08yes but if the concept of it were so offensive, would some sort of prohibition against the covering of the face not be in the bible?
No, why would it? There is a text about women covering their hair which some strict Bethrens observe but that was cultural and not in Jesus's teaching.
Reply 6
Original post
by Muttley79No, why would it? There is a text about women covering their hair which some strict Bethrens observe but that was cultural and not in Jesus's teaching.
well if something was so strictly against christianity surely it would be mentioned somewhere in the bible? if jesus doesn’t teach anything about whether or not we should cover our hair, is it not more reasonable to assume he would not care than to assume he would find it massively offensive?
Reply 7
Original post
by calummackenzie08well if something was so strictly against christianity surely it would be mentioned somewhere in the bible? if jesus doesn’t teach anything about whether or not we should cover our hair, is it not more reasonable to assume he would not care than to assume he would find it massively offensive?
No, this is a non-sequitor - please ask a Law teacher what they think. Logic-wise your essay is weak.
Reply 8
20
Your essay is way too long. At best you will actually write four very short paragraphs.
Don't ask rhetorical questions. Its an academic essay, not a Newsnight interview.
You really do need to do some work on basic English grammar.
I mark LNAT essays for a living. This essay would have scored very poorly and I doubt you would have received an offer.
Don't ask rhetorical questions. Its an academic essay, not a Newsnight interview.
You really do need to do some work on basic English grammar.
I mark LNAT essays for a living. This essay would have scored very poorly and I doubt you would have received an offer.
Reply 9
Original post
by Muttley79No, this is a non-sequitor - please ask a Law teacher what they think. Logic-wise your essay is weak.
idk any law teachers that’s why i posted it here lol. appreciate your help thanks
Reply 10
Original post
by McGingerYour essay is way too long. At best you will actually write four very short paragraphs.
Don't ask rhetorical questions. Its an academic essay, not a Newsnight interview.
You really do need to do some work on basic English grammar.
I mark LNAT essays for a living. This essay would have scored very poorly and I doubt you would have received an offer.
Don't ask rhetorical questions. Its an academic essay, not a Newsnight interview.
You really do need to do some work on basic English grammar.
I mark LNAT essays for a living. This essay would have scored very poorly and I doubt you would have received an offer.
What uni do you mark LNATs for? In terms of it being too long- do you mean that I won’t have time or that it would be better if it were shorter? I think grammar was largely down to rushing. Thanks.
Reply 11
20
Original post
by calummackenzie08What uni do you mark LNATs for? In terms of it being too long- do you mean that I won’t have time or that it would be better if it were shorter? I think grammar was largely down to rushing. Thanks.
By the time you have chosen a question, worked out how to respond to it, planned your answer, written the answer, and checked it, that will have used up all of your time. Aim at writing about half a page of A4.
Grammar is important, and you will be marked down heavily for any answer that reads like a wild argument with a mate in a bar. You are applying for an academic degree course.
Reply 12
Original post
by McGingerBy the time you have chosen a question, worked out how to respond to it, planned your answer, written the answer, and checked it, that will have used up all of your time. Aim at writing about half a page of A4.
Grammar is important, and you will be marked down heavily for any answer that reads like a wild argument with a mate in a bar. You are applying for an academic degree course.
Grammar is important, and you will be marked down heavily for any answer that reads like a wild argument with a mate in a bar. You are applying for an academic degree course.
the essay i posted was done in timed conditions. i assume that means i didn’t spend anywhere near enough time planning or checking. what uni do you mark for?
Reply 13
Several errors of punctuation. Americanised spelling. Factually mistaken as to the origins of Islamic dress codes. Disregards the issue of women's rights. Simplistic analysis of cultural differences. A bit flashy and superficial. Unduly colloquial. Fail.
(edited 1 month ago)
Reply 14
Original post
by calummackenzie08well yeah that’s kinda the entire point. of course the bible isn’t going to disagree with the bhurka, as it is not an important part of christianity at all.
You have missed Muttley's point by a mile.
Reply 15
Original post
by Stiffy ByngSeveral errors of punctuation. Americanised spelling. Factually mistaken as to the origins of Islamic dress codes. Disregards the issue of women's rights. Simplistic analysis of cultural differences. A bit flashy and superficial. Unduly colloquial. Fail.
Thanks for the feedback — there’s a lot to unpack. This was my first attempt, so my punctuation was probably affected by the time constraints. As for American spelling, the only example I can find is one instance of ‘offense’; would that significantly impact an LNAT mark?You mentioned factual errors about the origins of Islamic dress codes, but I don’t believe I discussed their origins, so I’d appreciate it if you could point out the specific line you’re referring to. Likewise, I’m not sure how the question was left unanswered — I stated my position clearly, even if you disagree with it. I agree the tone needs to be more formal; this was a first attempt, and I’m still getting a feel for the LNAT style. I appreciate your feedback, even though it is slightly disheartening.
Reply 16
Original post
by Stiffy ByngYou have missed Muttley's point by a mile.
Well I think we have both missed eachothers points. I wasn’t claiming that the burkha cannot offend christianity, merely that since it is not mentioned in the Bible, there are no sufficient grounds to claim that it is offensive, purely from a religious standpoint. Whereas clothing such as a bikini is explicitly stated as being offensive in the Quran.
Reply 17
Original post
by calummackenzie08Well I think we have both missed eachothers points. I wasn’t claiming that the burkha cannot offend christianity, merely that since it is not mentioned in the Bible, there are no sufficient grounds to claim that it is offensive, purely from a religious standpoint. Whereas clothing such as a bikini is explicitly stated as being offensive in the Quran.
Does the Quran actually mention a bikini? I doubt it as they did not exist when it was written ...
Reply 18
It doesn’t need to explicitly say the words bikini. It makes clear that it doesn’t support that level of exposure in public.
Reply 19
Original post
by calummackenzie08It doesn’t need to explicitly say the words bikini. It makes clear that it doesn’t support that level of exposure in public.
Of course it does by your comment about the burkha.
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