Two (sort of) breakups in a year
First serious relationship was from january to august. she ended things after her nan died but said she didn't see a future with me, thought she just saw me as a friend etc etc. came from nowhere. i was devastated. i wanted to start dating again but was far more cautious. no bad thing.
at the start of this month i met someone online again, and we saw each other for 4 weeks. Her nan died too, on christmas eve. she went into hospital just before our third date and she was told she didn't have long to live. but the girl continued to want to see me. she introduced me to her parents; i introduced her to some of my frioends. the night after that, when i introduced her to some friends after we stayed overnight together, i get a text to say she can't deal with a relationship with her nan's death.
this was said after she spent several hours at her ex's house. an ex she had seen previously throughout the time i had known her. they had apparently stayed friends. i wanted to speak to her about it but never got the chance.
i'm in bits. i don't know why i seem to attract emotionally unavaliable women. it makes me not want to date again to avoid getting hurt. we got on very well and i feel like a complete idiot. the day after soft-launching her on my socials she ends things. i look like a fool.
how do i possibly begin to move on and like recover from this? i already had trust issues from my ex and now this. it's like history repeating .
at the start of this month i met someone online again, and we saw each other for 4 weeks. Her nan died too, on christmas eve. she went into hospital just before our third date and she was told she didn't have long to live. but the girl continued to want to see me. she introduced me to her parents; i introduced her to some of my frioends. the night after that, when i introduced her to some friends after we stayed overnight together, i get a text to say she can't deal with a relationship with her nan's death.
this was said after she spent several hours at her ex's house. an ex she had seen previously throughout the time i had known her. they had apparently stayed friends. i wanted to speak to her about it but never got the chance.
i'm in bits. i don't know why i seem to attract emotionally unavaliable women. it makes me not want to date again to avoid getting hurt. we got on very well and i feel like a complete idiot. the day after soft-launching her on my socials she ends things. i look like a fool.
how do i possibly begin to move on and like recover from this? i already had trust issues from my ex and now this. it's like history repeating .
Reply 1
If there were to be a reality TV show made about you and your girlfriends together, I bet there'd be certain patterns of behaviour from you that made it more likely that your relationships wouldn't last.
For the 2nd relationship it sounds like one of your mistakes was to push the relationship forwards too seriously too fast.
I think that overall you have a lot to be positive about. You got 2 girlfriends in a year. That's 2 more than many people are able to get.
Go get yourself at least 1 new girlfriend in 2026.
For your next girlfriend, maybe you should be more selective? In terms of the inner world that she has, compared to your exes.
I can point you towards youtube channels that give good relationship skills advice, which should help you to know where you're going right and where there's room for improvement.
The thing about relationships is that it's easier (overall) to be the sort of romantic partner that never, or rarely gets dumped, than it is to be the sort of partner that gets dumped.
For the 2nd relationship it sounds like one of your mistakes was to push the relationship forwards too seriously too fast.
I think that overall you have a lot to be positive about. You got 2 girlfriends in a year. That's 2 more than many people are able to get.
Go get yourself at least 1 new girlfriend in 2026.
For your next girlfriend, maybe you should be more selective? In terms of the inner world that she has, compared to your exes.
I can point you towards youtube channels that give good relationship skills advice, which should help you to know where you're going right and where there's room for improvement.
The thing about relationships is that it's easier (overall) to be the sort of romantic partner that never, or rarely gets dumped, than it is to be the sort of partner that gets dumped.
Reply 2
20
Maybe get to know each other first... I mean sick family member is something to deal with and relationship may get in the way, but when you are just friends she may feel easier and more free to stay in touch and deal with emotions and come back to you when she's ready... She kept talking to her ex, so maybe being just friends was a better status for her....
When you get to know each other first and not start a relationship with a stranger it is easier and you can decide (both of you) when and how to move on....
When you get to know each other first and not start a relationship with a stranger it is easier and you can decide (both of you) when and how to move on....
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- Share your first love/crush experience
- did he breakup with me over text??
- Who keeps the dog in a breakup? 🐶
- Crushed, girlfriend has dumped me
- Yr12 friendship breakup
- Trying to find a balance between restricting and binging
- Self confidence help
- sound like bpd ??
- What do I do here?
- Why would an ex block on instagram, rather than remove me as a follower?
- opinions on taylor swift
- he broke up with me but still wants sex
- Relationships
- Never replied and then Blocked
- My boyfriend broke up with me during year 13
- 2 Year Relationship of Betrayal, In Need of Brutally Honest Advice
- Feeling depressed in freshers post breakup.
- Boyfriend broke up with me and I just don't know
- Welcome to my gyg ig?
- Aita for not wanting to be friends with my friends ex
Latest
Trending
Last reply 2 months ago
What food item are you currently craving?Last reply 3 months ago
Domino's pizza personal size vs small sizeLast reply 5 months ago
Am I the only one who hates holidays especially the summer holidays?Last reply 6 months ago
Anyone else been out of work for 9 years in a row?Last reply 6 months ago
parents wont let me take the course i want to takeLast reply 6 months ago
How do I tell my instructor I don't want lessons with her anymore?Last reply 6 months ago
Where can I find good-quality alternatives to luxury fashion clothing?
How The Student Room is moderated
To keep The Student Room safe for everyone, we moderate posts that are added to the site.
