Am I the ugly girl? Be blunt

Well, this is a first for a first post. Truth be told I am glad I found this place to ask questions I'd normally feel pretty ashamed to ask, because this one is something that has been on my mind a lot.
I'm gonna be blunt, I think I am an ugly girl. I know that there is now ourdays a common retoric that women cannot be ugly, even the most unattractive of a woman can get any guy she wants and more. I'll be honest, I never have fit that stereotype and felt awful for it, because appeariantly this is something that MUST happen. Otherwise I am a liar.
I am almost 21 by now and never had a boyfriend. Hell not even a kiss or anyone to show the slightest interest in me. If they did show subtle signs, that was brief and guys usually just looked at me once, then never spare me a second glance again in school or trains.
Dms? I am lucky if I get one or two a year and that is by an old man significantly further from my age group.
Even if I go out on social occassions, alone or with friends, I am the one being never approached or my friends get chosen over me. Or I get chosen as the last option, or out of pity that is pretty apparent.
Catcalling or h*rrassement? Never experienced by men. Only by one girl at the time whom I was "friends" with cuz literally no one else bothered to be so.
My other friends whom get constantly chosen though complain a lot about men writing about how they'd worship their bodies as in being annoying. Not even bad. Just annoying I personally would love it if a guy would have genuielly found me beautyful both inside and out. Physical attractiveness matters for both lust and love, I know it. So I wish I was not born probably this unfortunate looking. Men especially value beauty, so I think I am kinda lost here.
I also never get compliments, I am never the first option for girls to be friends with. I am sadly the girl who always gets used for a backup friend then gets dropped like a hot potato. When there was this occassion where everybody had to say something nice about me, even though we knew each other by then well enough, most went with the: "Yeah, she is pleasant and sympathetic" route. But I feel the way the room becomes awkward and tense when I am there.
While my bff gets complimented by both boys and girls, but the girls are obviously competetive with her despite all that. Despite the competetiveness, they are still so easily friends with her. They approach her, search for her. While I get treated like a child who has to be included. Otherwise they look like *ssh0les. I am just never included.
She is everything I am not. Curvy and wears make up, therefor she is more confident and asservative. Me?
Curveless. Like really. I have no curves on my chest. My chest size can be compatible with a half sliced apple lied flat. I also have a slightly assymetrical face. One cheek has more fat in it then the other. I am also short too and have a weak chin. My parents never bothered to support the health of my teath, or to do anything when I grinded my teeth at night. Even though they knew of it. So this is what I became. And now if I wanna look good, I have to pay for it per surgery (thanks mom, appriciate it).
There is also this guy in my class who is a typical neckbeard. Has ******ed views of women, but is despairate enough to add every girl in my glass in a heartbeat. Everyone but me appeariantly.
Great.
Another boy whom I had a pretty decent connection with (or so I thought, we always say hello to each other and ask how the other is doing because we knew each other since college. Or at least, we did so for a while because he had interest towards my former bff) has told my bff's boyfriend (lets call him K) that he knows me. Because K has shown the picture of our class, and the guy then immediatly recognized me, and asked him if he knew me. Obviously K said yes and asked him why he was asking. Then the guy just went: "Nothing. She is just so....one of a kind I guess?"
Idk if the context was good, K did tell me that he did not mean it in a malicious way, but it still felt wrong. Especially because he has been the one to be quite nice to me to greet me occassionally, and yet he hits K with the dismissive:"She is a one of a kind?"
Well, this is my experience. I just wanted to share it cuz I felt so alone with it. Even my bff tries to cheer me up with calling me beautyful. But I hate that so much when I am obviously not.

To be honest you’re being way too negative about yourself. It’s only the very attractive set where things land on a plate, everyone else has to work hard for it. Don’t undermine your self confidence, play to your strengths and things work our

First off, it's worth remembering that you're always your own worst critic. You're always way more harsher on yourself than other people typically are; it's the same whether we're talking about looks, personal achievements or whatever. On the other hand, things could almost certainly be a lot worse for you looks-wise:- What about burns victims? What about some poor so-and-so who's had acid thrown at them? What about someone with Porteous Syndrome? The message I'm trying to send here is rather than pinning on what you don't have, be grateful for the things you DO have; i.e. start seeing your glass as 1/2 full rather than 1/2 empty 🤔
I'm not going to patronise you by saying something along the lines of "You're beautiful just the way you are" because I've no idea what you look like. The one thing I WILL say is that if you're not happy about your appearance, then there are things you can do to improve it; whether that's exercise / dieting, or trying a new look / image. As long as you're able-bodied and have a desire to improve yourself, then you have the power to do this (although some people may have to work harder than others... it's still achievable if you want it bad enough). It's a bit of a cliché, but it's worth watching the musical Grease; namely Sandy's transformation at the very end.
The other thing is what are you proactively doing to put yourself in a position where people can see you? From what I've read, it sounds like your life is centred around school / college... maybe going out once in a while. Either way, it sounds like you're stuck in the same environment and never venture outwards. If you're not already at University, have you thought about applying in a new area? Have you considered travelling somewhere? A fresh new environment may be the perfect place to re-invent yourself, and you'll be meeting new people... plus you'll probably learn a lot about "you" and develop as a person.
The last thing I'll say here is if and when you decide to take action (whether that's trying a new image, moving to a new environment or whatever), is do NOT try to compete with or compare yourself to others. You don't know what pressures or journeys they've had to deal with. Instead, concentrate on running your own race and focus on becoming the best possible version of YOU!. Personally, I would recommend the exercise route... because as well as the physical changes, you'll get an endorphin / dopamine hit, so you'll also feel happier and better about yourself as a bonus (I'm sure anyone who exercises regularly will back me up on this).
You're still very young, so the future is in your hands (literally); it's up to you what you make of it.
Your second sentence isn't really true.
Almost everyone who is very attractive has to put some significant effort into their appearance... Fair enough, genetics may play some role in their looks, but as a guy, you don't get a 6-pack by drinking a 6 pack of beer... they have to spend a lot of time training, plus the food sacrifices in order to get lean so a 6 pack is visible. As for girls, to reference Grease (again), as Frenchie said, "Beauty is pain"... think of the pain they endure from all the waxing etc. to get that perfect look (not to mention any additional exercise to keep the evil cellulite at bay lol).
A personal trainer I know swears by this statement "There's no such thing as ugly people, only lazy people"._{(think about it)}

This post truly breaks my heart. While I may not be your age, I relate to many of your feelings, as they resonate with many girls. Today’s dating scene comes with heavy expectations that can feel toxic. Relationships often involve a mix of conflicts, emotions, and miscommunication. Romance is often glorified, which can distort our self-image. Just because a guy hasn’t approached you doesn’t mean you’re unattractive. It’s important not to let others dictate your self-worth.
Instead, focus on yourself and what makes you feel good. Feeling unsatisfied with your appearance is common, but this is a great time to discover and develop a new version of yourself. With self-love and confidence, you will naturally shine, and others will notice. You don’t need to fake who you are; if you work on becoming the person you want to be, others will appreciate the real you. Remember, good things come to those who wait.
I hope this helps. It’s sad to see such a wonderful person being so hard on herself. ❤️

I agree with you. Becoming a gym bunny is not the yellow brick road to romantic success.
Go to the gym if you enjoy the process of going to the gym and working out. Otherwise do something else with your time.
I also agree with you in living in the present moment and being proactive.
I can only speculate or guess as to the main reasons why you've not had romantic success so far.

How tall are you? If you're over 4'11" your height is fine.
You have a stunningly beautiful body. No ifs, no butts. No debate.
In a world where over 50% of women are overweight or obese, your body is a breath of fresh air.
Your chest is as sexy as hell. Because there's minimal sag.
There's many types of beautiful body. You happen to have an elfen form of beauty. It's a form of beauty that turns many men on.
The face, I can't comment on. As I haven't seen you, and I haven't seen a representative photo of you.
And don't worry about surgery for your teeth. As long as they do the job of chewing food OK, they're good enough and you should focus on other things in order to maximise your chances of finding love.
If your face is not the prettiest, it's quite simple: don't compete on the basis of your facial looks. Compete on the basis of your mega sexy body and your inner beauty.
I can't say for sure why you've not had success with men so far.
It's one of those where the reasons would probable be obvious to anyone with a bit of wisdom that spent a bit of time with you at a social event.

Well, this is a first for a first post. Truth be told I am glad I found this place to ask questions I'd normally feel pretty ashamed to ask, because this one is something that has been on my mind a lot.
I'm gonna be blunt, I think I am an ugly girl. I know that there is now ourdays a common retoric that women cannot be ugly, even the most unattractive of a woman can get any guy she wants and more. I'll be honest, I never have fit that stereotype and felt awful for it, because appeariantly this is something that MUST happen. Otherwise I am a liar.
I am almost 21 by now and never had a boyfriend. Hell not even a kiss or anyone to show the slightest interest in me. If they did show subtle signs, that was brief and guys usually just looked at me once, then never spare me a second glance again in school or trains.
Dms? I am lucky if I get one or two a year and that is by an old man significantly further from my age group.
Even if I go out on social occassions, alone or with friends, I am the one being never approached or my friends get chosen over me. Or I get chosen as the last option, or out of pity that is pretty apparent.
Catcalling or h*rrassement? Never experienced by men. Only by one girl at the time whom I was "friends" with cuz literally no one else bothered to be so.
My other friends whom get constantly chosen though complain a lot about men writing about how they'd worship their bodies as in being annoying. Not even bad. Just annoying I personally would love it if a guy would have genuielly found me beautyful both inside and out. Physical attractiveness matters for both lust and love, I know it. So I wish I was not born probably this unfortunate looking. Men especially value beauty, so I think I am kinda lost here.
I also never get compliments, I am never the first option for girls to be friends with. I am sadly the girl who always gets used for a backup friend then gets dropped like a hot potato. When there was this occassion where everybody had to say something nice about me, even though we knew each other by then well enough, most went with the: "Yeah, she is pleasant and sympathetic" route. But I feel the way the room becomes awkward and tense when I am there.
While my bff gets complimented by both boys and girls, but the girls are obviously competetive with her despite all that. Despite the competetiveness, they are still so easily friends with her. They approach her, search for her. While I get treated like a child who has to be included. Otherwise they look like *ssh0les. I am just never included.
She is everything I am not. Curvy and wears make up, therefor she is more confident and asservative. Me?
Curveless. Like really. I have no curves on my chest. My chest size can be compatible with a half sliced apple lied flat. I also have a slightly assymetrical face. One cheek has more fat in it then the other. I am also short too and have a weak chin. My parents never bothered to support the health of my teath, or to do anything when I grinded my teeth at night. Even though they knew of it. So this is what I became. And now if I wanna look good, I have to pay for it per surgery (thanks mom, appriciate it).
There is also this guy in my class who is a typical neckbeard. Has ******ed views of women, but is despairate enough to add every girl in my glass in a heartbeat. Everyone but me appeariantly.
Great.
Another boy whom I had a pretty decent connection with (or so I thought, we always say hello to each other and ask how the other is doing because we knew each other since college. Or at least, we did so for a while because he had interest towards my former bff) has told my bff's boyfriend (lets call him K) that he knows me. Because K has shown the picture of our class, and the guy then immediatly recognized me, and asked him if he knew me. Obviously K said yes and asked him why he was asking. Then the guy just went: "Nothing. She is just so....one of a kind I guess?"
Idk if the context was good, K did tell me that he did not mean it in a malicious way, but it still felt wrong. Especially because he has been the one to be quite nice to me to greet me occassionally, and yet he hits K with the dismissive:"She is a one of a kind?"
Well, this is my experience. I just wanted to share it cuz I felt so alone with it. Even my bff tries to cheer me up with calling me beautyful. But I hate that so much when I am obviously not.

Everyone wants what they don't have
As a female your body sounds like my dream
No one judges you they way you do

Get yourself to a club or pub and pull a nice guy

I am 5'2 tall which is already small where I live. Most women are also pretty thin here with at least C cups, so I am an exception. Thats not a good look. People describe my body as pdfile-ish, only good for gay man, hell I got even called a boy in disguise for looking the way I am and how my type cannot even be loved because that would make the bf who choses me as questionable or weak. Plus during intimacy I would look unsatisfying, and boring to most men, cuz I quote them: "Real men love meat, dogs get bones" and "because men are just hardwired to love curves cuz they signal better things". And its pretty evident with celebrities like Zendeya, who gets bashed for being flat and Sydney Sweeny who gets excused for a lot of wrong doings Zendeya would have been hated on for, only because she has curves. And I would rather be appriciated by men who are not way older then me or pdfiles, so I would not say my body is sexy. Sexy to those who love power plays, yes, maybe. But to the wast majority? Sadly no. So I debated to get surgery maybe in the future when I get older. Nothing major, just one or two cup sizes bigger. I am already aware of the risks, so I am pretty willing for that stuff. Thankfully in czech republic the surgery is more affordable.

Tried it, as I mentioned in my post, but I suppose some people are just not keen to read it. Did not work out. Nobody approached, or if I was with friends, they took my friends and left me hanging.

Why exactly is it your dream body? Most people who tell me that is because they won't get sexualized with it or get to sleep on their stomach. Sleeping on your stomach is unhealthy, I'd trade that to look mature and sexy anytime. And to say that because of my bodytype girls would not get sexualized is just translated to a more subtle version of "Lol, you are unattractive sexually to most men so you won't get bothered". What a "blessing" in disguise.

Tried it, as I mentioned in my post, but I suppose some people are just not keen to read it. Did not work out. Nobody approached, or if I was with friends, they took my friends and left me hanging.