uni isn’t working for me.
hi, i want to be clear before i go into this that yes i always knew uni was going to be hard and stuff. if you want to leave a nasty comment or tell me to suck it up, don’t bother. the coursework and work isn’t the problem, in fact i enjoy my course quite a lot. its the environment.
i’ve been at uni for about 4 months, still don’t know if this is too early but instead of settling in, making friends, being comfortable. i’m not. my anxiety has gotten worse and i don’t know how long i can do this for.
everyone is so far ahead of me. yes first year students. they all seem to know what to be doing and lecturers just expect you to know and just don’t support you despite saying that they will. i feel left behind and i struggle with mustering up the courage to attend uni especially the days where we are in lecture rooms and there’s just too many people and it’s too overwhelming.
i’ve asked for a referral to counselling because of this but there’s been little to no support in the meanwhile i have to wait such a long time on the long waiting list. at the moment, i’m also in the midst of being diagnosed with autism (no i’m not self-diagnosing but im on the waiting list to have a screening, etc.) and with this my social skills are bad, i’m overly sensitive, so on and so forth and the one lecturer i felt comfortable with to discuss this, they’re being made redundant which has just made things harder.
enough waffling. anyone else had similar experiences to me? do i stick it out or seek alternative paths? i.e. full time work, apprenticeships?, online work (if applicable) thanks in advance!
i’ve been at uni for about 4 months, still don’t know if this is too early but instead of settling in, making friends, being comfortable. i’m not. my anxiety has gotten worse and i don’t know how long i can do this for.
everyone is so far ahead of me. yes first year students. they all seem to know what to be doing and lecturers just expect you to know and just don’t support you despite saying that they will. i feel left behind and i struggle with mustering up the courage to attend uni especially the days where we are in lecture rooms and there’s just too many people and it’s too overwhelming.
i’ve asked for a referral to counselling because of this but there’s been little to no support in the meanwhile i have to wait such a long time on the long waiting list. at the moment, i’m also in the midst of being diagnosed with autism (no i’m not self-diagnosing but im on the waiting list to have a screening, etc.) and with this my social skills are bad, i’m overly sensitive, so on and so forth and the one lecturer i felt comfortable with to discuss this, they’re being made redundant which has just made things harder.
enough waffling. anyone else had similar experiences to me? do i stick it out or seek alternative paths? i.e. full time work, apprenticeships?, online work (if applicable) thanks in advance!
Reply 1
Original post
by Anonymoushi, i want to be clear before i go into this that yes i always knew uni was going to be hard and stuff. if you want to leave a nasty comment or tell me to suck it up, don’t bother. the coursework and work isn’t the problem, in fact i enjoy my course quite a lot. its the environment.
i’ve been at uni for about 4 months, still don’t know if this is too early but instead of settling in, making friends, being comfortable. i’m not. my anxiety has gotten worse and i don’t know how long i can do this for.
everyone is so far ahead of me. yes first year students. they all seem to know what to be doing and lecturers just expect you to know and just don’t support you despite saying that they will. i feel left behind and i struggle with mustering up the courage to attend uni especially the days where we are in lecture rooms and there’s just too many people and it’s too overwhelming.
i’ve asked for a referral to counselling because of this but there’s been little to no support in the meanwhile i have to wait such a long time on the long waiting list. at the moment, i’m also in the midst of being diagnosed with autism (no i’m not self-diagnosing but im on the waiting list to have a screening, etc.) and with this my social skills are bad, i’m overly sensitive, so on and so forth and the one lecturer i felt comfortable with to discuss this, they’re being made redundant which has just made things harder.
enough waffling. anyone else had similar experiences to me? do i stick it out or seek alternative paths? i.e. full time work, apprenticeships?, online work (if applicable) thanks in advance!
i’ve been at uni for about 4 months, still don’t know if this is too early but instead of settling in, making friends, being comfortable. i’m not. my anxiety has gotten worse and i don’t know how long i can do this for.
everyone is so far ahead of me. yes first year students. they all seem to know what to be doing and lecturers just expect you to know and just don’t support you despite saying that they will. i feel left behind and i struggle with mustering up the courage to attend uni especially the days where we are in lecture rooms and there’s just too many people and it’s too overwhelming.
i’ve asked for a referral to counselling because of this but there’s been little to no support in the meanwhile i have to wait such a long time on the long waiting list. at the moment, i’m also in the midst of being diagnosed with autism (no i’m not self-diagnosing but im on the waiting list to have a screening, etc.) and with this my social skills are bad, i’m overly sensitive, so on and so forth and the one lecturer i felt comfortable with to discuss this, they’re being made redundant which has just made things harder.
enough waffling. anyone else had similar experiences to me? do i stick it out or seek alternative paths? i.e. full time work, apprenticeships?, online work (if applicable) thanks in advance!
When anxiety is this high, your brain is trying to escape the pain, not evaluate options clearly. That doesn’t mean alternatives are bad it just means pause before burning bridges. And even without a formal autism diagnosis. You can still get temporary adjustments Email your course lead or student services explaining that large lectures are overwhelming and affecting attendance. Keep it factual, not emotional.
Reply 2
Original post
by Vie.explainsWhen anxiety is this high, your brain is trying to escape the pain, not evaluate options clearly. That doesn’t mean alternatives are bad it just means pause before burning bridges. And even without a formal autism diagnosis. You can still get temporary adjustments Email your course lead or student services explaining that large lectures are overwhelming and affecting attendance. Keep it factual, not emotional.
thank you. i understand that - i’m not trying to rush into anything so im just gonna take uni at my own pace, see how things go and yes i will make sure to ask about the temporary adjustments and ive managed to land myself an appointment with the disability team in 3 weeks time
Reply 3
Original post
by Anonymousthank you. i understand that - i’m not trying to rush into anything so im just gonna take uni at my own pace, see how things go and yes i will make sure to ask about the temporary adjustments and ive managed to land myself an appointment with the disability team in 3 weeks time
It’s great you’ve got that appointment booked already. I hope the adjustments help and things start to feel more manageable for you.
Reply 4
Yes, it is good you have got the counselling appointment booked.
How are things working out for you now?
For social anxiety:
I am not a psychology, counselling or a medical professional.
Social skills:
Be open, relaxed, approachable, friendly, lighten up, interested in others
0) You can try nlp exercises, meditation, breathing techniques, visualisation. You can read books on this subject and there is a wealth of resources on the internet, youtube regarding this subject.
1) Relax, imagine you're just observing or there as a traveller. For example, if you are on holiday, you go there to experience and observe the attraction, you're not going to get anxious doing that are you?
2) Smile, smiling in contagious.
3) Be confident, respect yourself, accept yourself, work out, wear good clothes, feel good, focus on your passions, know you are a good person who treats people well, you have got as much right as everyone else. Think positively, be proud of yourself, do things that make you happy, remember your happy times, what makes you confident? What makes you proud? Do you have a skill you are good at? Do things like cooking, driving, learning that increases your confidence daily. Relax. Have good posture, body language, improve your appearance. Be happy with yourself.
4) Dress well, have good grooming, hairstyle, have good posture.
5) Just say hi or hey to people in your vicinity, who cares if they don't say anything back?
6) Ask how they are, how's everything, how's it going, what's the latest,
What made them choose this course, their plans for the future, their plans for the rest of the day, weekend, how was their weekend, their day, what they will get up to, what they got up to, ask them about their hobbies, talk about what's happening.
You could read up on current affairs.Talk about the weather or did you see that sports game? Just mingle with them, compliment them, say "I like your jacket". If you know they went on a holiday or somewhere, ask them about it etc.
Small talk
7) Be passionate about life.
8) In group discussions, relax and talk to someone close or if someone says something you know, you can talk then. Stay relaxed. Just say it. Relax, if you know about the topic, just say it
9) Lighten up, have a laugh, laugh easily, be friendly, approachable, interested, relaxed.
10) You can write things down and come up with a rational reframed response, keep a journal of your thoughts, reach out to people slowly
How are things working out for you now?
For social anxiety:
I am not a psychology, counselling or a medical professional.
Social skills:
Be open, relaxed, approachable, friendly, lighten up, interested in others
0) You can try nlp exercises, meditation, breathing techniques, visualisation. You can read books on this subject and there is a wealth of resources on the internet, youtube regarding this subject.
1) Relax, imagine you're just observing or there as a traveller. For example, if you are on holiday, you go there to experience and observe the attraction, you're not going to get anxious doing that are you?
2) Smile, smiling in contagious.
3) Be confident, respect yourself, accept yourself, work out, wear good clothes, feel good, focus on your passions, know you are a good person who treats people well, you have got as much right as everyone else. Think positively, be proud of yourself, do things that make you happy, remember your happy times, what makes you confident? What makes you proud? Do you have a skill you are good at? Do things like cooking, driving, learning that increases your confidence daily. Relax. Have good posture, body language, improve your appearance. Be happy with yourself.
4) Dress well, have good grooming, hairstyle, have good posture.
5) Just say hi or hey to people in your vicinity, who cares if they don't say anything back?
6) Ask how they are, how's everything, how's it going, what's the latest,
What made them choose this course, their plans for the future, their plans for the rest of the day, weekend, how was their weekend, their day, what they will get up to, what they got up to, ask them about their hobbies, talk about what's happening.
You could read up on current affairs.Talk about the weather or did you see that sports game? Just mingle with them, compliment them, say "I like your jacket". If you know they went on a holiday or somewhere, ask them about it etc.
Small talk
7) Be passionate about life.
8) In group discussions, relax and talk to someone close or if someone says something you know, you can talk then. Stay relaxed. Just say it. Relax, if you know about the topic, just say it
9) Lighten up, have a laugh, laugh easily, be friendly, approachable, interested, relaxed.
10) You can write things down and come up with a rational reframed response, keep a journal of your thoughts, reach out to people slowly
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