Why can't i get any guy to like me?

I'm 18 and have been in 2 previous relationships and ever since those both ended I have been feeling so insecure and lonely especially seeing other couples together and being happy, it sucks seeing people my own age in relationships whilst I can't even get myself a boyfriend.
I don't have a crush on anyone at the moment but I just feel so alone and I always feel embarrassed that I can't get any guy to like me and every time I talk to a guy I feel like all he is thinking is how ugly I am...
Every guy I walk past looks me up and down and I feel so nervous when they do that because I think they're thinking about how ugly I look.
Is this normal?
Do I NEED to have a boyfriend at 18?
How do I become okay with being alone and not having a boyfriend?
Please help I really need advice.

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

To become okay with 'being alone' and not having a boyfriend there's a some things to take into account. One of which, is working on the realisation that its actually okay to not have a boyfriend, many people chose not to get into relationships as its just not what they're looking for, they don't want to, or that they even enjoy their own company e.g. 'being alone'. The reason it sucks seeing other people your own age in relationships (as a girl and 19 year old personally, who had a breakup in 2024 after being together for nearly 2 years) is because you've had that experience before and something in you has that feeling of "I wish i could have what they have", not to mention the big narrative that movies involving romance give us. But its important to remember that the things shown online such as movies, or even books are completely scripted. Yeah it seems so great reading about it or watching it but sometimes you have to question yourself and realise that being in a relationship isn't always like that, even in real life there is never a perfect relationship. Relationships also aren't always important, they're probably one of the biggest responsibilities that life throws in our way because its just the way human nature is. Your whole life, and everybody else's life you've seen people be in these relationships making it seem as though you HAVE to do it when really, you don't. Don't put yourself down either, providing yourself and your mind with the idea that 'all he is thinking is how ugly I am' isn't great for your mental health. Don't be so harsh on yourself. You are young, you have so much time to think about things and deal with things. Sometimes when people look at us our response sometimes almost always, instantly jumps to the idea that something about you isn't right. When actually, he could just be looking up to make sure they either don't walk into you, they might want to know if 'hey is this person someone i know or might know' or just simply looking, since being a person requires you to know who and what is in your surroundings so that you become familiar with it. The same goes for yourself.

With this said, look after yourself and do things that you enjoy doing alone or even with friends. This could be gaming, sports, going on walks, reading, journaling, going on a day out and even buying yourself that one thing you've had your eye on for like the past week..

Relationships aren't always something that you need to have, you are your own person with your own mind, your own body, and your own voice. And also, your feelings are completely valid, remind yourself of that ! 💗

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Thank you so much for this advice I'm so grateful that you took your time to write all of this. 💗

Reply 3

Goth Girl Mel

10

Original post

by Anonymous

I'm 18 and have been in 2 previous relationships and ever since those both ended I have been feeling so insecure and lonely especially seeing other couples together and being happy, it sucks seeing people my own age in relationships whilst I can't even get myself a boyfriend.
I don't have a crush on anyone at the moment but I just feel so alone and I always feel embarrassed that I can't get any guy to like me and every time I talk to a guy I feel like all he is thinking is how ugly I am...
Every guy I walk past looks me up and down and I feel so nervous when they do that because I think they're thinking about how ugly I look.
Is this normal?
Do I NEED to have a boyfriend at 18?
How do I become okay with being alone and not having a boyfriend?
Please help I really need advice.

You don't need a boyfriend at 18, just go out and have casual fun

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

Original post

by Anonymous

Thank you so much for this advice I'm so grateful that you took your time to write all of this. 💗

Of course ! It's no problem 💕

Reply 5

arwen-mccarthy81

20

the less you think about it the more likely a dude is to like you , just focus on living and having fun , go out with your friends and let life do its thing , you will find someone eventually don't worry , but you also don't need anyone , just take pleasure in the other relationships in your life like family and friends any you wont be lonely , there is absolutely no need to have a boyfriend at 18 just live your life and you will find love somewhere , even if its in later in life

Why can't i get any guy to like me?

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