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Finishing off with a girl watch

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    Hello, Basically heres my problem.
    If i go to a party or a club i can generally engage a girl in convosation and get on with them really well and then i attempt to dance but when it comes to the end of the night i can never go in for the kiss, as i have no iddea of what to say (u no like the line just before a kiss) i just go blank
    To try and rectify this ive been going out with girls who have asked me out in the pass and ive said no (last 18 months no major gf), and we get on really well holding hands, and then it comes to were alone or the end of the date and i go blank.
    Is there something wrong with me.. i never usually have a problem speaking to girls.

    thanks for ur help in advance
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    I read the title of this thread so wrong, LOL! I thought it said "finishing off a girl", which is a totally different conversation.

    Anyway... just go for it! Think of it like... playing a fruit machine. You're at a high/low gamble. Sometimes you roll a 12 or a 1, which is a sure thing. Sometimes you roll maybe a 2/3 or a 11/10... you can quite confidently gamble that. Sometimes you roll a 6 and it could go either way - but you go for it anyway because that 50/50 gamble is half of the thrill! OR you could take the money and run. It's safe, you keep your pride intact, but you always wonder if you could have got just a little more.

    ...That quite possibly makes no sense to... sane people. But it makes sense to me.
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    It may well just be nerves, if you're afraid of rejection or doing something wrong.

    I've never really done the *dating* thing, just a couple of long long term relationships that started slowly. The idea of starting something with someone I barely know is pretty foreign to me.

    Maybe you don't have to kiss her right away. If you've talked to her and you get along, and you like her, you can tell her you'd like to see her again, and get to know her better, and ask for her number.

    Once you see her a few times, you become comfortable with each other and things just happen naturally.
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    are there any lines to stop the awkwardness... ie just before as it seems to take forever
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    a line I used when I was drunk (which I won't use again) was just simply, 'I don't mean to be cheeky or anything but will you meet me?' and she said yeah so we just did it; I wouldn't really recommend it though you shouldn't really have to ask like someone said its just a natural thing
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    I'd say just go for it - like someone said, if they say no, it's hardly the end of the world. But if you're nervous already it can be a knock to your confidence, so you could just say "can I kiss you?" - it's worked with me before, and then if it turns out she's already taken or whatever, you haven't really lost face, and look like a gentleman. But really, it depends on the situation, so do what feels natural.
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    if you've been talking to them for a while and have had a good time together it'll hardly be saying one little thing that is going to make them change their mind about you (unless it's really terrible - but then that's probably an extreme) so just go for it...
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    incidentally can the girl make THE MOVE?cos all the guys i get with are shy wimps so i never get any
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    the best was...had been chatting and dancing with this guy and i was going and he says to me "am i not gonna get any"....err....just for reference NO!!!!!
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    (Original post by Jonah)
    Hello, Basically heres my problem.
    If i go to a party or a club i can generally engage a girl in convosation and get on with them really well and then i attempt to dance but when it comes to the end of the night i can never go in for the kiss, as i have no iddea of what to say (u no like the line just before a kiss) i just go blank
    To try and rectify this ive been going out with girls who have asked me out in the pass and ive said no (last 18 months no major gf), and we get on really well holding hands, and then it comes to were alone or the end of the date and i go blank.
    Is there something wrong with me.. i never usually have a problem speaking to girls.

    thanks for ur help in advance
    lots of little things, when you are dancing close, hold eye contact and then go most of the way, if she wants to kiss you she'll go the rest.

    Its basically the same for every situation, whereas she has to see it coming to an extent, ie, no across the room lunges, she doesn't necessarily have to give you permission. With things like this, from experiance asking permission breaks the mood, which is a bad thing.

    An absolute killer is stroking her hair behind her ear or away from her eyes, when you are standing close, then do the whole 90-10 thing.

    Dont say anything, actions speak louder then words.
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    (Original post by Mad_Monkey59)

    An absolute killer is stroking her hair behind her ear or away from her eyes, when you are standing close, then do the whole 90-10 thing.
    mr. suave --> get you!! that actually is a killer on me ... lol!
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    I have the same problem. With people I'm fairly sure really like me! Like the few times I've managed it, it's always been like "Can I do something?" or I've just done it. I'm really quite scared of rejection if I'm not paralytically drunk, and cambridge is a really claustrophobic place where a rejection like that would usually get out, especially since you know just about everybody at least through a friend.
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    (Original post by kokopops)
    mr. suave --> get you!! that actually is a killer on me ... lol!
    :cool:
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    well i had a similar problem with the guy i'm currently seeing.. on our first date i even invited him up to my room for 'coffee', he came up, drank the coffee, we had a long chat and then he went home. it was so frustrating!! so when he left i sent him a text saying 'i really regret not kissing you just now' and he texted back saying 'who knows, maybe you'll get another chance'. it was still awkward on the second date but he held my hand which was a step in the right direction, and then near the end of the evening i said 'you do realise that we still haven't kissed...?' and it was the most romantic kiss ever... the wait made it better in the end i reckon
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    (Original post by Toy Soldier)
    I read the title of this thread so wrong, LOL! I thought it said "finishing off with a girl", which is a totally different conversation.
    actually thats exactly what I thought... I was expecting

    'so if a guy 'finishes' first, is he expected to 'finish' off the girl in question'

    Which would have made a much better thread in my opinion
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    (Original post by naelse)
    well i had a similar problem with the guy i'm currently seeing.. on our first date i even invited him up to my room for 'coffee', he came up, drank the coffee, we had a long chat and then he went home. it was so frustrating!! so when he left i sent him a text saying 'i really regret not kissing you just now' and he texted back saying 'who knows, maybe you'll get another chance'. it was still awkward on the second date but he held my hand which was a step in the right direction, and then near the end of the evening i said 'you do realise that we still haven't kissed...?' and it was the most romantic kiss ever... the wait made it better in the end i reckon
    haha... first kisses should always be overdue.

    'coffee' on the first date! you saucy minx!
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    (Original post by Mad_Monkey59)
    actually thats exactly what I thought... I was expecting

    'so if a guy 'finishes' first, is he expected to 'finish' off the girl in question'

    Which would have made a much better thread in my opinion
    ur a nutter!!!
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    (Original post by Mad_Monkey59)
    haha... first kisses should always be overdue.

    'coffee' on the first date! you saucy minx!
    well what can i say? he's irresistable :love:
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    (Original post by kokopops)
    ur a nutter!!!

    I prefer 'mad' myself but I guess you're right.
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    (Original post by Mad_Monkey59)
    'so if a guy 'finishes' first, is he expected to 'finish' off the girl in question'
    come on, there's no doubt there... the answer is yes!
 
 
 
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