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    Well I'm feeling rather confused. I was sexually assaulted a year ago and it has been such a hard year. I mean I don't think about it alot now, I have sort of dealt with it but I didn't realise how much it's affected my relationships with boys and men. I mean I go on a night out and get frightened when a boy tries to dance with me, including going off crying just the other day.
    What's wrong with me? And will it ever get easier?
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    I would suggest that you go to see someone that has professional training to try and help you through this, as it is affecting so many aspects of your life. It is a very hard thing to get over and needs alot of courage so i do admire you for what you are doing at the momment, but there are times where you need to think about getting a little help. I would think your GP is the best first port of call, it is all a confidential and in no way will you be judged!
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    Have you had counselling about it?

    Nothing is wrong with you as such...it sounds a pretty natural way to react given the circumstances...

    Having never experienced it I don't know but I know plenty of people who have been through similar things and things have definitely got easier with time, but you need to seek help with it...don't keep it all to yourself.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well I'm feeling rather confused. I was sexually assaulted a year ago and it has been such a hard year. I mean I don't think about it alot now, I have sort of dealt with it but I didn't realise how much it's affected my relationships with boys and men. I mean I go on a night out and get frightened when a boy tries to dance with me, including going off crying just the other day.
    What's wrong with me? And will it ever get easier?
    Nothing is wrong with you. Please don't think that. A man (I assume) sexually assaulted you, and even though I'm sure you realise that all men aren't like that, it will take time for you to learn to trust again. I don't know the circumstances of your assault, but perhaps you're 'triggered', consciously or otherwise, by certain situations that remind you of the assault? There is nothing wrong with being scared when confronted with a situation which reminds you of something as terrible as sexual assault.

    You sound like you're coping really well, but it is a big burden to shoulder on your own. Have you ever told anybody about it? You might benefit from counselling - not because you've done anything wrong, not because your reaction is anything but normal, but because what happened to you is horrible, and sometimes talking things through with an impartial outsider can really help people heal and work through their feelings. If you're at university or college, try the counselling service there.

    Things will get better, I promise. To get this far, you must be a very strong person. You'll keep dealing with this
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    There's nothing unusual about your reaction and in time (with the right help) you can deal with it.

    Talking to a cousellor would be the best advice I can give, but you will also have to be prepared for this to come back if/when any relationship turns sexual - if it does flash back your partner will have to be very understanding...you will need to be able to talk to him!
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    P/M me if you want, exactly the same thing happened to me, and I had the same reaction.

    I can only say it does get better with time, and although it hasn't completely gone away from me it is easier. I'm so sorry for what happened to you, having someone make you scared of strangers or being alone with guys is just horrible.
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    Thank you everyone for your messages of support. I have tried speaking to people, but i get embarassed and feel like i'm being judged. I mean I have been fine in most ways, just sometimes I feel really alone.
 
 
 
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