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Nobody at uni to go clubbing with, feel lonely watch

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    I'm feeling really lonely at the moment and just need to write about how I'm feeling and ask for some advice.

    I'm a 21 year old girl in my final year of uni. The first 2 years were good as I did well academically at uni and had a good social life alongside it. I would go out on the student club nights and have a good time with my friends. This year its so different.

    The group of friends I used to go out with has broken up. Most of the people I knew are on their year abroad now or have drifted away and made other friends. I find myself feeling so lonely - especially on the student club nights - as I have nobody to go out with anymore and am stuck indoors feeling like crap.

    I used to go out with my housemate, as she's one of the only ones left from my old group. Shes been a bit weird recently tho. Shes made a new friend from her course and always goes out with her. I feel like she plays mind games with me, as she invites me along with them and makes plans with me, then on the day she'll sneak out to her friend's house to get ready for the night out and leave me alone in the house.

    My boyfriend goes out alot with his friends, but I feel really unwelcome when I go out with them as they're all 'boys' and I think my bf just wants to be with his mates on nights out. We used to meet up in the club before, but I get the feeling he doesn't like it when I arrive with him. Its ok when I'm with my group of friends and he's with his, but anything other than that seems a no-no.

    I just feel quite lost and sad that its my final year of uni, and I'm just going to be stuck indoors most evenings. I've tried to join societies and make new friends but it hasn't really led anywhere. At this stage, people seem to have their solid friendship groups and aren't interested in new friends. At least thats what I've found.

    Just feel depressed. its going to be a long night by myself while I know my boyfriend and housemate are out having a great time
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    What about people on your course? Could you not organise something yourself and invite lots of people on the same course as you?
    Your friend sounds like a bit of a ***** to be honest if she's sneaking off when she's made plans with you and she's not a true friend if she's doing this but still, if you really want someone to go out with why don't you invite her and her friend to go out and suggest they get ready at your house.
    I know it's hard trying to fit in to any social group where everyone is good friends but i guess you just gotta go for it and throw yourself in there and try to be a part of it.
    Sorry if this isn't much help
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    I agree with the course mates option. What uni are you at? I am also in my 3rd year
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    come chat on TSR where your real friends are!!!
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    What interests do you have outside of uni? Maybe find a club for your final few months? I would also try talk to your boyfriend about how he is making you feel unwelcome when you go out with him, which is totally out of order IMO.
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    (Original post by Captain Biggles)
    I would also try talk to your boyfriend about how he is making you feel unwelcome when you go out with him, which is totally out of order IMO.
    It would be if he was nasty about it, but i think I know what the OP means; sometimes you feel awkward being the only one of your sex with a group of your boyfriends mates. Like you're just there tagging along.

    OP yeah organise a night in with some of the people in your course seminar or something. Or try a 'catch up' with one of your old mates that has found a 'new group,' I'm sure they'd love to see you again, even if you all have accidently drifted apart?
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    That sucks that you're feeling lonely. I think a previous poster said this too - have you thought about looking outside of uni? Perhaps doing an evening class in something or other could be a way to meet people. Another option, although I don't know if you'd have time this being your final year, would be to get a part-time/weekend job? Perhaps even within your uni, so you could meet some new people to go to student nights with.

    Hope your situation improves soon!
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    Thanks for the advice everyone. Yeah I have some friends on my course but it kinda stops there. Ive gone out for a meal with them once or twice but when i text them arranging something theyre always 'busy'. I can understand that as its their last year, but at the same time I feel like they have their own main group of friends and Im not that important to them, if that makes sense?

    I just find it so weird. I have a lot of good friends at home but here everyone seems unreliable and very closed off to making friends. It feels like Im always the one making the effort to meet up with people and I just wonder what the point is sometimes, when they obviously dont really care that much
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    (Original post by wannabe mexican)
    come chat on TSR where your real friends are!!!
    I concur.
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    what uni are you at? I agree with the people talking about joining some kind of group outside of university..

    Also.. I really reccomend getting a bar job, just work one or two shifts a week (if you can manage it around your final year - i managed it ok) working in a bar can be so much fun and you'll make friends with the people there! They'll soon invite you out - you'll probbably make friends with locals who come in. I made more friends this way than actually on my course!
 
 
 
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