Losing Weight and Motivation Against the Odds Watch
I used to have the motivation to lose weight but now I don't. I've lost all confidence in myself, academically, physically and mentally. I used to have positive interaction with my peers but now it's all negative. I get bullied even worse for my weight and also for not having a boyfriend (I can't get one because I'm fat and therefore hideous).
I'm not demanding pity and wouldn't expect from this forum tbh. Just please don't say, "Lose weight, fatass." I want advice not insults.
Excuses (yes I know they are! I'm not dumb) :
I went down from a large size 18 to a size 16. My lowest was a big 14 but I gained weight during the last term because nobody wanted to be friends with me, didn't feel like losing weight and couldn't get exercise through walking.
I can't afford much at all! I had to spend my Christmas money on a coat for school (my mum claimed she couldn't afford it) so I could walk there and back without freezing, so I can walk an hour a day to burn some calories and increase fitness.
I can only go to the school gym twice a week after school because that when it is open.
I cannot eat salad because it literally makes me retch when I eat it. Even with dressing, it still tastes like leafy mud to me.
My Current Measurements Are:
36C/39 inch chest
31 Inch Waist
44 Inch Hips
14 Inch Neck
7.5 Inch Wrist
What Advice I actually need:
- How to motivate myself to do anything (I'm apathetic to everything)
- Recipes (because my mum will only cook unhealthy meals like Cottage Pie and Burgers)
- How to exercise properly and gradually increase my fitness again
- How to develop a self-esteem (and no, I can't join any clubs! There aren't any free ones in my area to my knowledge, unless you're willing to research hours for! )
- How to make people not hate me because they all seem to hate or ignore me (today some girls asked me to sit next to them and they spat all over my dinner which was a Baked Potato and Colesaw)
- How to ignore my bullies because the school won't do anything about it
- How to cope being poor
- How to feel happy
- How to get a Boyfriend (because I'm getting bullied for not having one my entire life)
- How to deal with hunger
-excersise? running? ppffffffttt, that the worst to start. try walking . Walking for 20minutes a day helps, walk to the park, walk to the groceries whatever. and then maybe toss in some pilates classes, they help muscles in the most complained about region (the stomach!)
-eat? try eating little things throughout the day, i find that helps. like dont have one HUGE MEAL and starve urself until that. try 5 times of eating a day, with small portions, thats how u beat hunger. Water, drink water, it does help alot, washing toxins out of the body.
-ignore bullies? they have nothing else to do. it gets to u, but think about how they play no purpose in your life.
-self esteeem, i guess small steps first. this might sound completely dumb, but notice what u like about urself. (eg. i really like my eyes, cause their a nice colour) and slowly keep building.
-Get a boyfriend? whats the rush? maybe even though u havent had one, maybe someone will come along that will be worth the wait.
hope this helps :O
PS: For health-conscious recepies on the budget try canned fish, especially tuna (in brine/spring water), rice, frozen veg, wholemeal pitta bread, use some spicy cooking sauces (jalfrezi, balti etc) to make it tasty. Canned rattatouille is nice too! Use olive oil for cooking if you can.
Avoid at all costs: kebabs, fries, fizzy drinks, even fruit juice (or at least dilute it with water - loads of sugar in there), nuts (fat), cheese (fat), any processed meat or anything else that has loads of fat or sugar in it (check the labels when you go shopping)
- Motivation -> Give yourself short-lived goals.. say for the next week. Write them down on a piece of paper, and read it in the mornings. They're better than long term goals because it'll feel like you're not gaining from anything to begin with. Other motivation could be self motivational quotes, or having someone to diet with. I'm up for it, if you wish!
- Recipes -> As I said, it's not the food that's the problem, it's the quantity. Reduce your portions, and eat at proper meal times. Don't eat after 8pm, either.
- How to exercise properly -> You've already started! You're walking to school, maybe go at a quicker pace? Dancing in your room to music where no-one can see you seems like a good idea to me, as well.
- How to develop a self-esteem -> I was watching a TV prog with Gok Wan in it earlier, and it said about how he used to be overweight, and how his self esteem was built by losing weight, and that encouraged him to lose more weight, which built his self esteem which made him lose more weight, etc. If you're not very good at socialising, maybe you could meet a few people in your area online that you know of from another school, and then go out with them? That'll mprove your interraction with people.
- How to make people not hate me because they all seem to hate or ignore me (today some girls asked me to sit next to them and they spat all over my dinner which was a Baked Potato and Colesaw) -> What they did was sick, you shouldn't have to put up with people like that. Filthy animals.. They probably appear to dislike you because you're probably shy and come across differently to other people. Is there anybody in a similar boat in your year? Talk to someone in one of your classes about work you're doing.
- How to ignore my bullies because the school won't do anything about it -> I dislike people who say ignore bullies, you need to stand up for yourself. I used to get chronically bullied, I stuck up for myself and I gained friends because they then knew I couldn't be walked over.
- How to cope being poor -> My family is extremely poor. Primark is your best friend, ebay etc.. Have you got a job? EMA?
- How to feel happy -> PM me?
- How to get a Boyfriend -> Do you feel pressured into having a boyfriend? You shouldn't. I think you just want affection more than anything. But as I said, the Internet idea I said above could be an idea here, that way they know your weaknesses and strengths and they know your personality and have their opinion of you before you meet, and if you meet then you know they like your personality so what have you got to lose?
- How to deal with hunger -> It's all in the mind, unless you're actually starving yourself... Small quantities as I said above. If you get peckish, maybe some grapes.. they're delicious, hehe.
Good luck, OP.
Pm me if you need to.
Good recommendations above. Try to follow them. On top of that Ive found that drinking strong green tea helps to boost your metabolism, hence burn more calories while you rest. Losing weight in theory isn't that hard. You have to burn more calories than you consume, which means eat less and move around more, as in be physically active as much as you can. Be careful to avoid starvation mode tho - it's very bad for you! Try to maintain the difference of about 150-200 calories a day. Walking is a good start. Try to progress to jogging though as soon as possible, and prefferably with some bursts of high intensity runnin, like at max speed. The more sports you do, the more weight you'll lose, the more motivated and confident you'll be, which will lead you on to achieving the rest of your goals. You just have to reverse the vicious circle! Good luck!
1. Combined walks/jogs.....walk for three minutes....jog (slowly when you start) for three.
2. If you can't afford pilates classes, then buy a Pilates DVD......sugarjunkie is right, the core is incredibly important.
3. If you don't like salads.....how about vegan meat substitutes? Most of them are flavored very well, contain some fiber, and a LOT of protein. I personally think that the veggie breakfast "meats" are the closest tasting to the real thing. Otherwise, you'll be forced to get your veggies in more creative ways.
If you like things like stir-frys, then this is a reallllly easy way to get some veggies. My husband taught me how to steam veggies in a microwave (I hate veggies normally) that end up tasting downright yummy!
Buy some frozen veggies at the super-market, a bottle of soy oil, and some tobasco sauce.
Fill a cereal sized bowl with veggies, put in about a teaspoon of oil, and hot sauce to taste, and microwave with anouther bowl on top until they're hot (usually about three minutes). Delicious, and easy to make!
If you like baked potatoes, try hollowing out some of the inside before you eat it....scoop out about 60% of the white part with a spoon after they're cooked, and then fill your new boatish shaped potato with yummy healthy things like veggie chili (comes in a can).....or a few spoon-fulls of reduced fat sour-cream and chives (with salt and pepper for me....mmm).
This sounds stupid but is having a ricecake and a small pickled onion an unhealthly snack? Because I just ate one because I came home really hungry... when I diet and exercise at the same time, I get seriously hungry.
The key to successful and sustained weightloss, is to find a way to live the rest of your life, in a state of maintenance. There's no point eating like a rabbit for a few months and lose the weight, then go back to your bad habits once you've hit your target.
Therefore, eating ricecakes is pointless, unless for some bizarre reason you actually enjoy eating something that tastes like polystyrene.
Porridge with skimmed milk and splenda is a good, long lasting, low GI snack that will keep you going. You need to eat good, wholesome food to keep your insulin levels maintained so you don't end up having sugar cravings and ultimately eating crap again.
In terms of healthy dinners and things, how about stir fries, rammed with lots of lovely fresh veg (carrot, cabbage, beansprouts, broccoli, etc etc) and served with wholegrain rice? Bulgar wheat cooked in chicken stock with courgette, red onion and carrot is a favourite of ours. There are loads of healthy eating recipe books out there if you're stuck for ideas.