desperate but also too picky Watch

ANM775
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#1
I am 23, single and have been for a long while


I'll be completly blunt, I am reaching a point now where i'm starting to get DESPERATE for some sex, wacking one out solo just ain't cutting no-more. A little piece of me dies each time i notice a girl is attracted and i let the moment pass.

I am fortunate in the sense that i am decent looking (..srry for sounding arrogant) so occasionly when i'm out and about in the day a girl will look at me, and we'll make eye contact where i can tell she is attracted, but whenever this happens i never do anything about it because either she looks too young for me, or she's not too young, i find her attractive but am not too crazy about her look (beauty is subjective and all that..),
as yet it hasn't happened that a girl has looked at me in that way, looked over 18, and i found her particular look very appealing.

and it's not even like i can afford to be so picky, i am a quiet guy around people i don't know well by nature so have no real "game" so to speak, so going upto someone who dosen't look interested and trying to charm them away i'm currently unable to do. going upto someone who does look interested i can do.

I'm ashamed to admit it but for a good month now i have seriously thought about trying to use someone for sex. like if it looks like the girl is attracted, go and talk to her ...and then try to sleep with her quickly whilst keeping up the pretence i want a relationship. but like i said, i am a quiet guy by nature and also not a player by nature so doing something along these lines to someone really seems quite dispicable to me.

I really do not know what to do as i really want some sex, am i being too soft in being only willing to aproach girls i want a relationship with rather than casual sex?

am looking for male opinions mostly
0
quote
reply
Satan's Whiskers
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#2
Report 9 years ago
#2
Don't lower your standards just coz you want some nookie!
0
quote
reply
TIJK
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#3
Report 9 years ago
#3
Read The Game...enough said if sex is all you're after
0
quote
reply
Jelkin
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#4
Report 9 years ago
#4
(Original post by ANM775)
am looking for male opinions mostly
Why, out of interest?

Anyway. Can't you hook up with someone and NOT pretend it'll lead to a relationship? I reckon if you looked around a bit you could find a girl who would enjoy having sex with you without there being any kind of relationship context to it.
0
quote
reply
enigma373
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#5
Report 9 years ago
#5
Quit being a pansy and go take advantage of some poor, unknowing girl.
0
quote
reply
snowfox
Badges: 0
#6
Report 9 years ago
#6
2 words: Beer Goggles
0
quote
reply
ANM775
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#7
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#7
(Original post by TIJK)
Read The Game...enough said if sex is all you're after
read it, infact i've read alot into that general area, but not to sleep with tons of women, to help me to find one i really like.

currently battling aproach anxiety, if i can open the most i can do is ask for directions or the time. it is a big sticking point for me.


(Original post by Satan's Whiskers)
Don't lower your standards just coz you want some nookie!
my brain is telling me one thing (that it isn't a nice thing to do), but my other brain (the one below my belt) is starting to really want to have his way, hence me deciding to make this thread.




(Original post by Jelkin)
Why, out of interest?

Anyway. Can't you hook up with someone and NOT pretend it'll lead to a relationship? I reckon if you looked around a bit you could find a girl who would enjoy having sex with you without there being any kind of relationship context to it.
As is happens there is a girl at work who i know finds me attractive (as she said though albeit indirectly), ..but i read another thread on here which says you're likely to get a slap or something if you go round asking girls for casual sex so tbh that has put me off asking....

am looking for male opionions mostly too see if other males think i'm being too soft in my views
0
quote
reply
ANM775
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#8
(Original post by enigma373)
Quit being a pansy and go take advantage of some poor, unknowing girl.

was that being sarcastic ..or do you really think i am being a bit too soft?
0
quote
reply
Jelkin
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#9
Report 9 years ago
#9
(Original post by ANM775)
read it, infact i've read alot into that general area, but not to sleep with tons of women, to help me to find one i really like.

currently battling aproach anxiety, if i can open the most i can do is ask for directions or the time. it is a big sticking point for me.

my brain is telling me one thing (that it isn't a nice thing to do), but my other brain (the one below my belt) is starting to really want to have his way, hence me deciding to make this thread.

As is happens there is a girl at work who i know finds me attractive (as she said though albeit indirectly), ..but i read another thread on here which says you're likely to get a slap or something if you go round asking girls for casual sex so tbh that has put me off asking....

am looking for male opionions mostly too see if other males think i'm being too soft in my views
Well, if a girl asks you out and you say no but offer sex as some sort of "consolation prize" then yes, you deserve a slap. This is slightly different ... however, I don't think it's advisable to just go around asking for sex. Maybe go for a night out with some work people including this girl, then see what happens? If you do end up in a sexy situation though you should make it clear it's just for kicks.

This thread is screaming out for men who will say, "stop being a pussy and get some, who cares if the girls think you'll be in a relationship, it's their fault." You're above that.
0
quote
reply
dave180
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#10
Report 9 years ago
#10
I admire the honesty you'rer a brave guy.

Sounds like you're putting too much thought into it. Don't try to go into some deep analysis about the whole situation, because a lot of the time sex and rerlationships really arn't as complicated as you make them out to be. If you see a nice looking girl, talk to her. The worst that can happen is she won't be interested. And go clubbing if you don't already.
0
quote
reply
TIJK
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#11
Report 9 years ago
#11
(Original post by ANM775)
read it, infact i've read alot into that general area, but not to sleep with tons of women, to help me to find one i really like.

currently battling aproach anxiety, if i can open the most i can do is ask for directions or the time. it is a big sticking point for me.
Have you tried preparing a little script for yourself, routines you use to just get things moving? If you can open, then really it's just about portraying confidence, while showing you're willing to walk away, but wanting her to want you to stay.

Also, try different openers instead of just asking for time or the direction, stop a random girl and just say "excuse me, but could you answer this question for me....." Then once she does, go into your next routine.
0
quote
reply
QuantumTheory
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#12
Report 9 years ago
#12
Have a little self erspect for yourself and respect for the girls, maybe?

You'll find the right person, try hanging out in different places. Maybe the fault lies within you, so girls don't come up to talk to you.
When you do meet 'the right person', they might not see past this 'flaw', so, in all honestly, take a long hard look in the mirror; not at what you want, but what you can give.
0
quote
reply
Darkness and Mist
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#13
Report 9 years ago
#13
Dont be a an arse and control your urges.
0
quote
reply
mr-breaker
Badges: 7
Rep:
?
#14
Report 9 years ago
#14
You essentially have 4 options:

i) Go to the club/bar looking sharp, find a woman who is feeling you, get to know her, have sex with her. ez game.
ii) Take a walk somewhere busy during the day looking sharp, find a woman who is feeling you, get to know her, have sex with her. ez(ish) game.
iii) Pay for it (There goes the desperation. For at least 8 seconds anyway :laughing: )
iv) Accept that if you are so snobby/picky that you cannot find ONE woman a day in this magnificent city of ours that you would like to get to know better/have sex with, you may as well give up.

Ask yourself what you are afraid of (AND BE HONEST!). Here in London, there are TONS of women dying to meet you. But because you are vain, and because you are a puppet of your ego, you go without. :no:
0
quote
reply
oystergirl
Badges: 0
#15
Report 9 years ago
#15
God, they're brutal on here...a man that doesn't want to use a girl just for sex..bring it on!! You're not a pansy just a decent human being. Don't listen to the idiots who tell you to take advantage. If you see someone you like just go up to her, women are unlikely to apporach you. The worst she can say is no. Pity you are in london, some of us girls are gagging for it too! lol
0
quote
reply
chipper1990
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#16
Report 9 years ago
#16
surf dat ho
0
quote
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Were you ever put in isolation at school?

Yes (233)
27.48%
No (615)
72.52%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise