Girlfriend's Ex won't disappear

1

Been with my girlfriend just over 4 months, everything's absolutely fine, great in fact. :smile:

She & her ex split last January after about a year & a half together (long distance thing). They 'kind of' stayed in contact, she changed her number and wasn't letting him know it, so he decides, while on holiday in NY, to e-mail her. He's now found about me, and seemingly decided he wants her back. She's not interested, and has made that clear to him, but he won't give up - recent texts from him(yep, she gave in and let him have her number - I told her it wasn't a good idea, and she's regretted it ever since!) include things like "I miss you", "I still like you", "Don't you miss me?" etc. She said it isn't gonna happen because she has a boyfriend, his reply was "But I can be your bf :-(."

He's been texting this sort of thing for weeks, and I'm getting tired of it. She's told him to go away, but he refuses to give up. I want to give him a piece of my mind, but my girlfriend won't let me. What do I do?

I should add that it was him that finished it in the first place.

Reply 1

bass_belle

11

omg sounds like my ex. he split with me the day before my birthday and i met someone else a few weeks later. my ex found out about him and started texting me saying he wanted me back still loved me etc, i said i was with someone else and much happier. he said "you can be happy with me :-("
ex then decided to go to the police and accuse new bf of beating him up... one problem though. he had seen me, my bf, a friend and her bf in town. he didnt know whos bf was who and described my friends bf. ha ha bad luck. made it all up.
he then started sitting outside my house, and ringing me at 2 am, hacking into msn accounts, just being a general annoying retard.
my dad rang up his step dad, said what was happening, the step dad started going "oh there is 2 sides to every story" in this cockey fashion. when my dad had said that the ex had been driving dangerously behind my mum thinking it was me, whilst me and dad where in the car behind him, and that he had hacked into my msn, the stap dad was begging us not to go to the police.
hasnt contacted me since.
and from what i have heard in town, the ex is in alot of trouble after having sex with an underage girl......

Reply 2

geordiebabehh

10

Same scenario with me when i got with my boyfriend. My old boyfriend harrassed us for ages, even ended up in a few scraps when we were out.. and him texting me saying he wanted to be back, even though he finished it on bad terms.

Me and my boyfriend almost let it get to us but we stayed strong and we realised that the best thing to do was ignore him.

It got to the stage where, when we were out and saw him, we had to pretend that we 'couldnt see him'.

I sent his mail address to the blocked senders list, and also done it on my boyfriends email just incase.

I suggest you both do this, as it could get nasty like it did with us. And also get your girlfriend to change her number again. Its not worth the hassle.

My ex even got so bad that he was sending my new boyfriend messages on myspace! As that was the only way he could contact me... so we blocked him on that too.

Dont let him ruin what you both got.

People always want what they can't have, and this is the reason he is doing this.

Good luck! x

Reply 3

storminaDcup

what the other 2 have said is good advice so i would follow that.
ex's are bloody annoying, 2 years down the line with my boyfriend and his is still on the scene..she makes no secret of the fact that she still likes him. it pisses me off but i know my boyfriend is completely devoted to me and wouldn't get back with her ever.

Reply 4

carrotboy

2

bass_belle

omg sounds like my ex. he split with me the day before my birthday and i met someone else a few weeks later. my ex found out about him and started texting me saying he wanted me back still loved me etc, i said i was with someone else and much happier. he said "you can be happy with me :-("
ex then decided to go to the police and accuse new bf of beating him up... one problem though. he had seen me, my bf, a friend and her bf in town. he didnt know whos bf was who and described my friends bf. ha ha bad luck. made it all up.
he then started sitting outside my house, and ringing me at 2 am, hacking into msn accounts, just being a general annoying retard.
my dad rang up his step dad, said what was happening, the step dad started going "oh there is 2 sides to every story" in this cockey fashion. when my dad had said that the ex had been driving dangerously behind my mum thinking it was me, whilst me and dad where in the car behind him, and that he had hacked into my msn, the stap dad was begging us not to go to the police.
hasnt contacted me since.
and from what i have heard in town, the ex is in alot of trouble after having sex with an underage girl......

What a ****!

OP, I would try and have a small talk with the guy, but don't get aggressive or anything. Keep it calm and clean, but put your point across. Don't apologise for anything either, like say 'sorry'. You'll come out as the better guy and he will realise that hes only chasing after her because she has someone new and he doesn't like it. Try to do it in person as well, not over the phone/text because he can then see you're genuine.

I know, because I'm in that position right now and I hate it. I do want her back, but not because shes got someone new. But recently I've just thought that if shes happy then i'm happy, all that love stuff *sigh* and so starting to keep control over it. We're still great friends. If her new boyfriend said something to me I'd learn to accept it a little more, I would be a little more comfortable that she is in good hands.

Reply 5

Waffles

OP

1

Thanks for all the advice, and bass-belle, sounds like you had a lucky escape!

My girlfriend spoke to him the night I posted this topic and he said he'd stop the texts etc, and would just text from "time to time" to see how she is.

Half past midnight last night/this morning, we're laid in bed together, her phone rings. He's p*ssed as a fart and decides, while he's "brave enough" (his words) to tell her that he wants to go back out with her, still loves her, etc.

Needless to say, I wasn't happy. My girlfriend wouldn't let me have the phone to say anything because he was drunk and it was apparently not the right time. She told him if this carried on then it'd be me he'd be talking to, not her - he hung up.

I went for a walk to calm down while my girlfriend rang him again telling him to stop it. He's apparently 'sorry' for interfering, but "just needed to tell" her how he felt. At this point his battery went dead, but between phone calls he'd sent a message saying; "[Girlfriend's name] ive been so stupid. I love you so much"

She's going to text him today and tell him how embarrassing last night was for him etc, and if he doesn't stop then he'll be talking to me instead.

Girlfriend's Ex won't disappear

Related discussions

Articles for you