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Possibilty of not seeing boyfriend for two years
ok
my boyf and i are both at uni (Cambridge). we are both doing 3 year courses - in maths and architecture. however, he is from Taiwan, and in Taiwan it is compulsory to do 2 years of military service once you have left uni.
i know i'm boing a bit premature, seeing as we have only been together 5 months, but it is going so well, that i can realistically see us still being together at the end of our degrees.
and this is the point. its freaking me (and him) out that when he does his military service, we will see each other about twice, in TWO YEARS!
i mean he will have leave wekends, but i will be in england. the only way he can get out of it is by carrying on with studies - eg PhD, of by getting married, but that only works if you've been married for 3 years.
anyway, i am not being at all rational, since i don't even know if we'll still be together, but i cant help thinking about it....
my boyf and i are both at uni (Cambridge). we are both doing 3 year courses - in maths and architecture. however, he is from Taiwan, and in Taiwan it is compulsory to do 2 years of military service once you have left uni.
i know i'm boing a bit premature, seeing as we have only been together 5 months, but it is going so well, that i can realistically see us still being together at the end of our degrees.
and this is the point. its freaking me (and him) out that when he does his military service, we will see each other about twice, in TWO YEARS!
i mean he will have leave wekends, but i will be in england. the only way he can get out of it is by carrying on with studies - eg PhD, of by getting married, but that only works if you've been married for 3 years.
anyway, i am not being at all rational, since i don't even know if we'll still be together, but i cant help thinking about it....
I know its hard to do, but take each day at a time and dont let it completely ruin what you already have. Just remember that if it really is meant to be it will be!
It might sound a bit drastic but you could take a year out in Taiwan and so that way at weekends u hav a good chance of seeing him? Just a thought. Good luck!
It might sound a bit drastic but you could take a year out in Taiwan and so that way at weekends u hav a good chance of seeing him? Just a thought. Good luck!
Reply 2
Scarlet, I sympathise with your situation. I met my fiancee (an American international student) at university but she was skipped year 1, meaning she finished a year before me. As with you, the thought that we'd be apart for at least a year popped up every now and then but it seemed quite distant. Of course the time flew by and before we knew it it was time for her to leave. It's been almost 16 months since we last seen each other and it has been VERY difficult for both of us, but we will be getting married later this year! In fact we both wish now that we had just married before she had to leave, though I think the '3-years' issue will mean that's not an option in your case.
I can't overstate how difficult the time apart will be, but my feeling is that if what you have is real, then it will endure and survive hardship.
I can't overstate how difficult the time apart will be, but my feeling is that if what you have is real, then it will endure and survive hardship.
No, no, this advice is missing something. What you need is some form of elaborate scam, involving at least one sham marriage. Marry him now, stall for as long as possible, and hopefully he'll be able to bend the rules a little. Or get him to get citizenship here or something? Not sure how it works.
Reply 6
Zurich
And surely if he stays in England, he won't have to do military service in Taiwan.
And surely if he stays in England, he won't have to do military service in Taiwan.
hah try telling that to the Home Secretary. Staying in England is a lot harder than that.
Anyway, thanks for the replies. I have decided to take it as it comes, and not worry about it. if the worst happens, then i can just hope our relationship is strong enough to get through it.
Reply 8
scarlet ibis
ok
my boyf and i are both at uni (Cambridge). we are both doing 3 year courses - in maths and architecture. however, he is from Taiwan, and in Taiwan it is compulsory to do 2 years of military service once you have left uni.
i know i'm boing a bit premature, seeing as we have only been together 5 months, but it is going so well, that i can realistically see us still being together at the end of our degrees.
and this is the point. its freaking me (and him) out that when he does his military service, we will see each other about twice, in TWO YEARS!
i mean he will have leave wekends, but i will be in england. the only way he can get out of it is by carrying on with studies - eg PhD, of by getting married, but that only works if you've been married for 3 years.
anyway, i am not being at all rational, since i don't even know if we'll still be together, but i cant help thinking about it....
my boyf and i are both at uni (Cambridge). we are both doing 3 year courses - in maths and architecture. however, he is from Taiwan, and in Taiwan it is compulsory to do 2 years of military service once you have left uni.
i know i'm boing a bit premature, seeing as we have only been together 5 months, but it is going so well, that i can realistically see us still being together at the end of our degrees.
and this is the point. its freaking me (and him) out that when he does his military service, we will see each other about twice, in TWO YEARS!
i mean he will have leave wekends, but i will be in england. the only way he can get out of it is by carrying on with studies - eg PhD, of by getting married, but that only works if you've been married for 3 years.
anyway, i am not being at all rational, since i don't even know if we'll still be together, but i cant help thinking about it....
cant u find another one for when hes gone?
there's no point fretting now, you'll spoil the time you have together (i always do that just before my boyfriend goes back to uni - "oh we've only got 2 days....2 hours..." etc and then when he's gone wish i'd just enjoyed having him around!)
when it comes to it, maybe you could go to taiwan for a year out. or you could always go over for just a couple of weeks over his leave. either way, if it's meant to be, it will be. that's the way love works!
when it comes to it, maybe you could go to taiwan for a year out. or you could always go over for just a couple of weeks over his leave. either way, if it's meant to be, it will be. that's the way love works!
Related discussions
- Dental Therapy or software engineering??
- Competent authority pathway
- AITA for pushing my best friend of 3 years
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- Boyfriend holiday help
- relationship advice.. (18 year old and 24)
- The Long Distance Relationship Society Advice Centre Mark II
- Should I (20 M) break up with my boyfriend (20M) / are my new feelings genuine?
- is there a possibility to redeem myself? combine science
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- Boyfriend's birthday- am i wrong for feeling this way?
- do i swap unis to be with my boyfriend
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