Need male opinions

Reply 40

1

magiccarpet

well if you cant tell until quite far down the line then how is it a turn off for guys, do they dump the girl due to this?

in my experience, guys find my lack of experience a turn off. when i say im 20 and stilla virgin they stay well clear :frown:

In my views, it depends.

Guy --> Don't intend for a long relationship --> Sex --> The more the experience, the better

*Note: I have also known of guys who is only willing to have flings with virgin girls and then play them out.

Guy --> Intend for a long relationship --> It is better that the girl is still a virgin.

For the second scenario, let us just put it this way, would a girl who is passionate and true in love, hope that the guy is also passionate and true as well? The girl most probably will not be happy if the guy has bedded numerous girls before.

I guess the same goes for the guy. Although most guys may say that they do not mind, deep down in their hearts, I am sure they do mind and in the event that a quarrel may break out, it might become an issue to bring up again.

Regards,
Ericz.

Reply 41

Zurich

9

If anyone wants to wait until marriage, I respect that. I'd love someone before sex became an issue, and if I loved her, it wouldn't put me off.

It would be a problem if anyone thought less of me because I didn't wait until I was married though. For me it was more about waiting for the right time and the right person, and I did.

I wouldn't want any girl who didn't value sex the same as I do. If she goes out and has sex with anyone because she doesn't see it as a big deal, she's not the girl for me.

A girl who would only have sex with the right person is perfect.

Reply 42

anjimcflanji

OP

1

i think some girls prefer the guy to be more experienced so that they take the lead and they wouldnt really go for a guy who was less experienced. im glad so many guys have replied to say tho that they don't mind and would actually like a girl who hasn't been the village bicyle..this is encouraging stuff!

Reply 43

babybrittie07

QUESTION FOR ALL AND ANY GUYS
Why is it okay for the guys to go around and get it whenever, but if a girl gets it when she wants it then everyone calls her a slut or ***** or something like that!!!
A GIRL HAS TO GET IT LIKE A GUY HAS TO!!!!!!!!

Reply 44

babybrittie07

Why Can A Guy Get It Whenever He Wants....and nothing gets said about him?
I am a 16 year old girl and I LOVE sex, I think that a girl should be able to get it whenever she wants without people talking about them sleeping around...
So if a guy could answer my question, Why is it ok for the guys to sleep around but its not for the girls?

Reply 45

Zurich

9

babybrittie07

Why is it ok for the guys to sleep around...

In my opinion, it's not.

I love sex too, I just value it highly enough not to share it with anyone I'm not in love with.

I view those that sleep around equally, male or female.

Reply 46

GillyUK

I lost my viginity when I was 14 to someone older. He wasn't a virgin and was able to 'show me the ropes'. I think it was stupid to do it so young, but I don't regret it for a moment. I don't have any hang ups about sex and I have realistic views. Yeah it's so much more amazing in a loving relationship (a lot of girls can't even orgasm without) but just as long as you want it for you, then that's great and you should go for it. If however you don't find a guy who you like/ trust enough to sleep with then that's fair enough. It's a matter of circumstance, not being ugly or prudish or whatever. I have a couple of friends who are the most amazing, gorgeous people alive and they're virgins and we're all 20/21. It really makes no difference, and the right person for a relationship with you will agree. Besides, the first time is horrible! Hurts like hell! So put it off for as long as you do/ don't want, it's no issue really . :smile:

Reply 47

Ericz

1

babybrittie07

QUESTION FOR ALL AND ANY GUYS
Why is it okay for the guys to go around and get it whenever, but if a girl gets it when she wants it then everyone calls her a slut or ***** or something like that!!!
A GIRL HAS TO GET IT LIKE A GUY HAS TO!!!!!!!!

I am not too sure about how western thinking is like. Maybe someone could enlighten me on that.

For the traditional Chinese society, a man can have many wives, can flirt around, but not the girl. The girl will be heavily criticised, called a slut if she has an affair and she can only have 1 husband.

I think this thinking is attributed to the fact that guys thinks that they are more elite than the girls. But in fact, they are just more egolistic and MCP than the girls.

I do not think that this thinking applies now because I believe that a girl can be as capable, if not even more capable than a guy in today's society.

In any case, I think it should be fair that if u want a girl to be faithful to you, you should be faithful to the girl too. Of course, do correct me if I am wrong.

Reply 48

SamTheMan

17

GillyUK

I lost my viginity when I was 14 to someone older. He wasn't a virgin and was able to 'show me the ropes'.

That's a pretty crap reason to sleep with someone: so they show you the ropes. Too many people think that sex is like a sport where you have to be shown the rules. Discovering sex with another virgin will be just as good, as long as you connect and you "listen" to eachother.

It's also a total myth that by losing your virginity and multiplying the number of partners, you'll be good in bed by a certain age than someone who's only had a few experiences.

The technical aspect of sex is a tiny fraction of what makes up the whole experience and makes it enjoyable. What's more, what works with one partner won't work with another anyway. What you "learn" is the intimacy of the whole experience and how to listen to and understand your partner. But if you actually see the whole experience more as a lesson than an intimate experience, you won't learn anything.

What happens with people who start young and sleep around is that they often aren't that good in bed. A lot just don't know how to be intimate and share the experience with their partner.

Reply 49

Zurich

9

SamTheMan

That's a pretty crap reason to sleep with someone: so they show you the ropes. Too many people think that sex is like a sport where you have to be shown the rules. Discovering sex with another virgin will be just as good, as long as you connect and you "listen" to eachother.

It's also a total myth that by losing your virginity and multiplying the number of partners, you'll be good in bed by a certain age than someone who's only had a few experiences.

The technical aspect of sex is a tiny fraction of what makes up the whole experience and makes it enjoyable. What's more, what works with one partner won't work with another anyway. What you "learn" is the intimacy of the whole experience and how to listen to and understand your partner. But if you actually see the whole experience more as a lesson than an intimate experience, you won't learn anything.

What happens with people who start young and sleep around is that they often aren't that good in bed. A lot just don't know how to be intimate and share the experience with their partner.

Post of a legend

Reply 50

magiccarpet

2

GillyUK

I lost my viginity when I was 14 to someone older. He wasn't a virgin and was able to 'show me the ropes'. I think it was stupid to do it so young, but I don't regret it for a moment. I don't have any hang ups about sex and I have realistic views. Yeah it's so much more amazing in a loving relationship (a lot of girls can't even orgasm without) but just as long as you want it for you, then that's great and you should go for it. If however you don't find a guy who you like/ trust enough to sleep with then that's fair enough. It's a matter of circumstance, not being ugly or prudish or whatever. I have a couple of friends who are the most amazing, gorgeous people alive and they're virgins and we're all 20/21. It really makes no difference, and the right person for a relationship with you will agree. Besides, the first time is horrible! Hurts like hell! So put it off for as long as you do/ don't want, it's no issue really . :smile:

yea actaully. in all my relationships (one :frown:

) and all the guys i've met who i was attracted to, i liked it alot better if they were experienced. cos i dont have any experience so im a bit shy. if the guy is shy as well, then we dont get anywhere,if he has experecnce its the only way we can go out together. otherwise the relationship would get stuck in the will we-wont-we stage which sucks. in all relationships someone has to take the lead

by experience, i mean doing stuff with girl, but not necessarily sex, just so they dont go all shy and wimpy when a girl makes a move/they fancy you

Reply 51

DayTripper

It's also a total myth that by losing your virginity and multiplying the number of partners, you'll be good in bed by a certain age than someone who's only had a few experiences.

Couldn't agree more, it's not like playing the piano or something similar, where the more you practice the better you get, simply because everybody is different, not neccessarily better or worse, just different. Different in what they like and different in how they like it.
Sure there are certain 'special' techniques you can learn, but through experience? Not neccessarily, a book, website or even TV programmes could tell you just as much. And even then, because everyones different you might be completly off the mark, as much as anything, it's about learning what your particular partner likes, and so a virgin or an experienced person will probably both be at the same starting block when with a new partner.
As for wanting to wait, theres no problem in that whatsoever, if thats what you want to do, you should never let yourself be pressured into something like that. On the other hand I will add that the agony aunt said on This Morning that 'abstaining untill your married is all very well, but what happens when they find out they are not sexually compatible' or something like that, dunno why, but that sprung to mind when someone mentioned about waiting til they were married, not sure how true it is. Not even sure why I remembered it!

Reply 52

DayTripper

Why Can A Guy Get It Whenever He Wants....and nothing gets said about him?
I am a 16 year old girl and I LOVE sex, I think that a girl should be able to get it whenever she wants without people talking about them sleeping around...
So if a guy could answer my question, Why is it ok for the guys to sleep around but its not for the girls?

As long as there are guys sleeping around, there must be girls to sleep around with them, and I dont see why that should be a problem at all!! As, long as it's all protected...etc, and theres no cheating involved, doesn't really hurt anyone.

Reply 53

magiccarpet

2

yes but why is it ok for guys to but not girls?

Reply 54

anjimcflanji

OP

1

i think it sucks why shouldnt any girl be allowed to go out get what she wants? in some american high schools they've turned the tables. if the boys call girls anything like slappers easy sluts etc the sit that boy (those boys) down and all the girls get to taunt them and say things like that to them..funnily enough they have better relations now generally.

Reply 55

magiccarpet

2

how do u know that?

Reply 56

anjimcflanji

OP

1

saw it in the newspapers a lil while back..seems quite a gd idea

Reply 57

magiccarpet

2

i just did the other poll in the thread about if you'd be bothered if your partner had had alot of partners.

girls:half said it mattered, half didnt care.
boys:19 cared, 4 didnt.

but why do girls need to have no sex but boys can have alot?

Reply 58

magiccarpet

2

no but really guys , from the poll only =like to sleep with virgins/litte experience. why is this?

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