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To know or not to know?

weegie2004

Ok, heres a dilemma. My father has a terminal illness and only has a few years left, but thats not the best part, ive just found out that its hereditary! Although the symptoms are relativley mild until middle-age, i have been offered a genetics test to determine wether i have it or not. I have a 50/50 chance of having the disease. Part of me wants to take the test so i know for sure, another part of me says no, i should just get on with my life and see if symptoms develop. What do i do?

Reply 1

queenselphie

I'm so, so sorry for you :-(
this isnt a descision anyone else can make for you, some people would rather know, some people not. Neither option is going to be pleasent for you, and I hope you are surrounded by people who can support you and your family through this difficult and trying time for you. Don't try to decide just yet, you've got an awful lot to think about anyway, without dealing with this yet.

Reply 2

Barny

17

I would go for the test, just a personel choice

Reply 3

Alewhey

imasillynarb

I would go for the test, just a personel choice

Ditto. I can't justfy it, I just think I would have to know...

Reply 4

frost105

14

We had the same problem in our family. My nana has a disease that causes the base of her brain to atrophy and thats genetic. We had counselling and were asked if we wanted to have the test. We all decided to because we didnt want to spend the reat of our lives thinking what if? Plus my brother had it done largely cause he didnt want to be responsible for passing it onto his own children. We all were negative which was a huge relief although my aunt wasnt so lucky. She was depressed really badly for a few months and then decided she didnt have the time to waste and has sorted out some trips and finalised what plans she wants when she finally loses her ability to look after herself.

Reply 5

NickiM

14

Aw, I am really sorry to hear about your situation. I would have the test, just to have peace of mind. Best Wishes for the future. :smile:

Reply 6

eurasianfeline

13

weegie2004

Ok, heres a dilemma. My father has a terminal illness and only has a few years left, but thats not the best part, ive just found out that its hereditary! Although the symptoms are relativley mild until middle-age, i have been offered a genetics test to determine wether i have it or not. I have a 50/50 chance of having the disease. Part of me wants to take the test so i know for sure, another part of me says no, i should just get on with my life and see if symptoms develop. What do i do?

Personally...i would take the test. Thinking that there's a chance of u having the disease can really haunt you.

Reply 7

Wild Thing

11

i would take the test to know if i have it...i it would turn out i'd have it, I wouldn't have children ..just a personal choice-->wouldn't want to pass it on to my children...

so what have you decided to do :frown:

Reply 8

Barny

17

My grandard died of a some sort of liver disease which is hereditary, my dad doesn't have it, which makes it more and more likely that me and my brother might have it, but Ive yet to get tested for it.

Reply 9

Monteferro

weegie2004

Ok, heres a dilemma. My father has a terminal illness and only has a few years left, but thats not the best part, ive just found out that its hereditary! Although the symptoms are relativley mild until middle-age, i have been offered a genetics test to determine wether i have it or not. I have a 50/50 chance of having the disease. Part of me wants to take the test so i know for sure, another part of me says no, i should just get on with my life and see if symptoms develop. What do i do?

Gosh, I don't know what to say. :frown:

If I were you, I'd take the test because you won't be left in suspense that way.

Reply 10

bondjamesbond

1

it's better to be prepared... it's better to know... good luck

Reply 11

at least lara

1

i'd want to know, personally, because either way ill be more grateful:
(1) if i didn have it, i'd probably be less likely to take life for granted from now on.
(2) if i do hav it, then i'd live in the moment more because i'll understand that life isnt forever and i hav to pull what i can take from it.

either way, GOOD LUCK to both u and ur father and if u do decide to get tested i hope u'll be dealing with scenario (1)

Reply 12

Lil' Miss Smiley

1

Sorry to hear about your father and I hope you and your family are coping well.
Personally I would want to know. I would then make a list of things I would like to do, places to see and enjoy life to the full. I would make sure that when the time comes I have all my preferences in place. That way noone can argue over whos doing what and when or how.

Reply 13

honest_mistake

my grandad died from an incuerable disease which is herreditory. its a mental disease quite simular to alzheimers but worse. the problem is theres no test for it. although its hard for anyone who isnt in your exact position to say, if i had the choice, i would deffinatley take the test. i find the worst bit is not knowing (as other people have said, you wont know if your passing it onto children etc).

Reply 14

saz_1989

2

weegie2004

Ok, heres a dilemma. My father has a terminal illness and only has a few years left, but thats not the best part, ive just found out that its hereditary! Although the symptoms are relativley mild until middle-age, i have been offered a genetics test to determine wether i have it or not. I have a 50/50 chance of having the disease. Part of me wants to take the test so i know for sure, another part of me says no, i should just get on with my life and see if symptoms develop. What do i do?

I'm really sorry to hear that :frown:

I can't tell you whether to get the test or not, I can only tell you what I'd do...

Okay, you can get the test. Two options:
You find out you've got the gene and then you can look into ways of fixing it, and you can know that you might live, say 20 years shorter (without sounding morbid) and then live your life to the full for the next however many years.
You find out you haven't got the gene and that's a huge weight off your shoulders.

If you don't find out, then you'll never know.

I think you have to decide whether you'd prefer to live potentially knowing that you have the gene, or live without knowing.

You could give it a while and see if it drives you nuts not knowing. Think about if you knew, and you had it. How would you feel? Would you have preferred to not know? What about if you have kids? Would you want to know if it could be passed on?

Good luck and keep smiling :smile:

Reply 15

Esme

my aunt died when i was 9 of something which in the end all came back to a hereditary form of epilepsy. my parents gave us the choice to be tested and i went ahead with it. it involved a catscan and a variety of other things. anway, i was in the clear, as were the rest of my family. it was just such a relief to know once and for all.

the decision is yours, i wish you loads of luck, it sounds like you need it.

Reply 16

Latayah

11

Im know ur heard it all before; but like (i think evry1 else); i'd take the test! Personally b./c hopefully if i didnt have the illness den i culd put it all behind me (which u wuldnt truly be able to do unless u'v done it)

Me myself wuld be finkin the worst neway so if i did have the ilness at least i could mould my life with my priorities first, get used to the idea, and to allow my family to get used to the idea

N personally im the sort of person hu need to know evry fing; but this is just me!
The best advise i culd give is to go wiv ur heart!

I really hope evry fing goes well; wateva u chose to do! Best of luck to evry1 else wiv similar issues!

Reply 17

nikk

15

The best thing to do is speak to a counsellor first in my opinion as both choices can have long term consequences on you mentally. It is best someone talks to you first and explains these to you before you decide.

Reply 18

Esme

NikNak

The best thing to do is speak to a counsellor first in my opinion as both choices can have long term consequences on you mentally. It is best someone talks to you first and explains these to you before you decide.

Thats the best suggestion ive heard so far, u shud definately do that.

Reply 19

frost105

14

NikNak

The best thing to do is speak to a counsellor first in my opinion as both choices can have long term consequences on you mentally. It is best someone talks to you first and explains these to you before you decide.

Most hospitals can put you in contact with a genetics counseller who can talk you and your family through the situations.

To know or not to know?

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