A mixture of problems.. LDR and dissertation. Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
#1
I\ll be brief. I'm in final year of uni, also in an long distance relationship with a girl I love. Last day of term is tomorrow. I have been working for two terms on dissertation and other random assignments. I'm handing in another essay (the 4th of this week) tomorrow. I have had no time whatsoever to start my dissertation - it took months to research, get to a structure/idea i was happy with.

Now, i'm due to go transatlantic this weekend. I looked at my dates and my first draft is in for Apr 20th, with final hand in May 18th. I get back from the states on the 7th April. I'm in line for a 1st; am i being ******* stupid going away? is it possible to right 12k words of 80%+ work in 4-6 weeks?

I started to panic. Rang my girlfriend, figured it was a lose-lose situation. I either go to see her and risk top marks (or any at all) or don't, and break both of our hearts. She was in bits when I even approached the situation of not being able to go.

Maybe i'm being pathetic, maybe i'm over analysed the situation. I don't know what to do. Go or not.
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The Socialite
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#2
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I know it's difficult in an LDR, but really, if she's a supportive girlfriend she should understand how important a final year dissertation is...it's what you've been doing all those A-levels, personal statements, first and second year assignments and exams for...so you have the skills built up for the dissertation. This is important stuff. Your girlfriend is of course of importance too, but you can always go and see her after the dissertation is handed in.

If you've been in an LDR for a while, an extra six weeks or so isn't going to be too difficult. You won't be breaking both of your hearts - absence makes the heart grow fonder. Keep in touch over skype etc in those six weeks and it will come around before you know it! Then you'll be able to spend quality time with your girlfriend, safe in the knowledge that you worked your hardest on your dissertation.
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oo_Lucinda_oo
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Don't go - she'll understand if she's someone worth being with.

Come on, this is what you've spent the past three years and all this money on, not to mentioned A-levels etc, you don't want to waste it - particularly when you're in line for a first!

She can wait 2 months or so, surely? Why not explain to her that if you get your first, you'll be able to get a good job after uni, meaning you'll have lots of money to come and see her whenever possible. I understand her being upset, but she should understand really.
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 9 years ago
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My head's all over the place.

She ultimately said that she would love me no matter my decision, but of course she's going to say whatever she can to get me to come.

Which is fair play. I just don't know what to do. I find the distance stupidly hard, and having a 'date' to look forward to is what keeps me going, ie. this weekend. With that potentially gone it's ******* horrible. and ultimately she still has university when i hand-in so we wouldn't know when we're seeing each other next.
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tea_cakes
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Your dissertation is important and should be top priority for you, do you really want to risk missing out on doing the best you possibly can do after all the time/work/money you've already invested in your degree? This is a change for you to excel; your girlfriend will still be there when your dissertation is finished. Of course she's going to be upset at not being able to see you, but at the same time she should realise how important these next few months are for you.

I'm in a long distance relationship myself and my boyfriend and I have had to change our plans to fit around my deadlines/his work. It's not nice having to do that and I know how much you will cherish having a date to look forward to but sometimes other things in life take over.
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Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 9 years ago
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Arrgh, going nuts.

What makes it worse is that she has planned her spring break around this, so will be left alone cross state from her family/friends.. even her dad was flying out to meet us for 2-3 days.
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Findlay6
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I dont see why you cant go?
Im assuming youll be sepnding every day with her? If so, im sure she wouldnt mind giving you space every day for as long as you like so you can do your work. Or you could cut the trip short, spend time with her whilst doing work, and then when you get home earlier finish your work.

win-win.
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inksplodge
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#8
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Can you not try and do the dissertation whilst you're over there? Surely you can sacrifice a few hours of each day to work on it?

Findlay6's suggestion seems good too :dontknow:
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Anonymous #1
#9
Report Thread starter 9 years ago
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Well im going.. gonna go pick up some books or so and take my laptop and maximize time i have. Also gonna see if i can cut it short by a few days.
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MC REN
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#10
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If you've done most of the research and things then 4-6 weeks of solid work should be enough for the dissertation - especially if you think about drafts and things whilst away. Although maybe your first draft will suffer...
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