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Ever had the feeling a person was so right for you?
Well, here goes, went out on saturday, saw my lovely ex who is also a fantastic mate - well it was his bday and thats why i was out. Anyway, go round pubs etc, end up in a club and kissing him again. Now this happened on my bday last yr and i ended up staying at his. And whenever we see each other, there is always flirting etc but after kissing him this time, he tells me hes seeing someone ( for about a week and half!). Bascially I'm so confused but am as the title says, he feels so right for me and I'm not sure whether to take action or not? 
any suggestions/ppl been through this before?
any suggestions/ppl been through this before?Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
luce20
OP
I went out with him like in 2003 in january - I moved on. I went out with other ppl after him but if theres nothing there, then why everytime now does stuff happen? I certainly don't take a fancy to any other of my exs after i see them, and I see them quite often.
Reply 2
luce20
I went out with him like in 2003 in january - I moved on. I went out with other ppl after him but if theres nothing there, then why everytime now does stuff happen? I certainly don't take a fancy to any other of my exs after i see them, and I see them quite often.
Could just be plain, simple sexual attraction.. if he was well and truly right for you then maybe things would have worked out the first time, or he'd have split from the girl he was seeing by now? Not trying to be harsh or anything.. but if he has a girlfriend then a) he's cheated on her with you and that's hardly a desirable trait in a future partner, b) he effectively already lied to you by not telling you he had a girlfriend before he kissed you, c) if he's with someone, you're better off spending your time finding someone who feels right for you AND is available AND less likely to cheat on you and lie by default
Reply 4
M-J
When you see him does your heart skip
Is he by any chance a heart-sturgeon?
MB
Reply 5
Yes, I've met someone who couldn't be more perfect for me. Unfortunately, he doesn't feel the same. In my experience, the more right they are for you, the less they want to be with you. 
I had a similar thing with my ex. We finished in October 2002, and kept meeting up and just kissing each other (sometimes more) when ever we saw each other. This went on for a couple of months but it never progressed to us getting back together. After a while I thought: hang on, why am I waiting around to see if he wants me back, when I could be moving on from him. He obviously doesn't want me back or he would have done something about it. So I decided then and there that I didn't want to meet up with him anymore. He started asking me to get back with him, but I knew deep down that if we got back together it would just end in tears again.
Anyway I'm soooooo glad I never got back with him, cos about 4 months later I met the man I'm with now. We're engaged, planning our wedding, and I totally know he is the one for me. We are just so perfect for each other.
Anyway I'm soooooo glad I never got back with him, cos about 4 months later I met the man I'm with now. We're engaged, planning our wedding, and I totally know he is the one for me. We are just so perfect for each other.
Reply 7
yes...actually i have that feeling for my bf. the first time we went out for movies...i thought he was a very relaxed guy and comfortable to talk to. then by the 2nd time...he ended up with his arm around my shoulder and i just let him...cos i felt something...just something really special. and the third time we went out...it was valentine's day...and we were sitting next to each other in a coffee shop after a movie...and eventually...both of us went silent after talking...and we just...kissed. i felt this spontaneous chemistry and we kissed for a long time. i guess we both felt it. i've never felt that before...not even with my ex. something is just special btw me and my bf that i dunno how to explain it. but it's there...and i can just feel it i guess. 
Reply 8
luce20
OP
yeah I understand what your all saying! Ive been thinking about it all today and am still confused to how I feel. Lessthan three, the only reason we spilt was because of my depression and it was me who ended it as I was feeling so alone at the time and he was in leeds, but I get what u mean. Grr, its all so messed up in my head!
Reply 9
nope
I was seeing a guy for almost 2 years when I was 16. We finished but if ever I was single and saw him in town we would end up pulling. I wasn't sure if I still fancied him but I knew I didn't want to get back together with him. Our relationship had ended for a reason. That went on for a year or so. I knew I was compleatly over him but whenever we were drunk we would fall back into old habits. Eventually I just realised that the only reason why we did it was because we enjoyed the familiarity of it. Nothing else. We are very close friends even now but I wouldn't go back to casual pulling with him again.
Reply 11
I have had the feeling. It turned out to be right. Im not sure it always is though, sometimes what we think is our heart is just our hormones making a mockery of us good luck!
good luck!Reply 12
Reminds me of my ex....
He was just so matched to me, it was lovely.
First met him 8 months ago, almost to the day.
I could go on for a while about what made him seem so perfect for me, but I won't.
He also had depression - tended to get quite morose late at night about whether he really liked me. We split up, he texted me 3 weeks later, "I really miss you", a month or two later, it happened again, we split up, after he started really questioning it.
I tried to bury my feelings until after the Jan exam period, whereupon I really started missing him again.
Talked to him about it (that's one of the things I really admired about him, he always said what he felt, whatever it was...), and he said we'd always be good friends.
Which I'd hope is true... but god I miss him. He's started seeing someone else too (started a week ago), which really twisted the knife
Meh, I rambled on there, but I know the feeling, except its now been 5 months since we split up, and I'm only just realising how much he meant to me
He was just so matched to me, it was lovely.
First met him 8 months ago, almost to the day.
I could go on for a while about what made him seem so perfect for me, but I won't.
He also had depression - tended to get quite morose late at night about whether he really liked me. We split up, he texted me 3 weeks later, "I really miss you", a month or two later, it happened again, we split up, after he started really questioning it.
I tried to bury my feelings until after the Jan exam period, whereupon I really started missing him again.
Talked to him about it (that's one of the things I really admired about him, he always said what he felt, whatever it was...), and he said we'd always be good friends.
Which I'd hope is true... but god I miss him. He's started seeing someone else too (started a week ago), which really twisted the knife
Meh, I rambled on there, but I know the feeling, except its now been 5 months since we split up, and I'm only just realising how much he meant to me
Reply 13
luce20
OP
Ive been thinking about it all day and as much as I want to ignore it I know i should move on.damn. Just so angry I ruined it in the first place- I knew we would have lasted otheriwse.
Reply 14
luce20
OP
bwgames
Reminds me of my ex....
He was just so matched to me, it was lovely.
First met him 8 months ago, almost to the day.
I could go on for a while about what made him seem so perfect for me, but I won't.
He also had depression - tended to get quite morose late at night about whether he really liked me. We split up, he texted me 3 weeks later, "I really miss you", a month or two later, it happened again, we split up, after he started really questioning it.
I tried to bury my feelings until after the Jan exam period, whereupon I really started missing him again.
Talked to him about it (that's one of the things I really admired about him, he always said what he felt, whatever it was...), and he said we'd always be good friends.
Which I'd hope is true... but god I miss him. He's started seeing someone else too (started a week ago), which really twisted the knife
Meh, I rambled on there, but I know the feeling, except its now been 5 months since we split up, and I'm only just realising how much he meant to me
He was just so matched to me, it was lovely.
First met him 8 months ago, almost to the day.
I could go on for a while about what made him seem so perfect for me, but I won't.
He also had depression - tended to get quite morose late at night about whether he really liked me. We split up, he texted me 3 weeks later, "I really miss you", a month or two later, it happened again, we split up, after he started really questioning it.
I tried to bury my feelings until after the Jan exam period, whereupon I really started missing him again.
Talked to him about it (that's one of the things I really admired about him, he always said what he felt, whatever it was...), and he said we'd always be good friends.
Which I'd hope is true... but god I miss him. He's started seeing someone else too (started a week ago), which really twisted the knife
Meh, I rambled on there, but I know the feeling, except its now been 5 months since we split up, and I'm only just realising how much he meant to me
sorry to read this! Hope things work out for you!Reply 15
Yeah... and his *wife* is just like me 
Reply 16
luce20 sorry to read this! Hope things work out for you!
sorry to read this! Hope things work out for you!Thanks...
I've got to move on, though its hard, I've not seen anyone who comes really close to what he was like
Yeah.... I know we shouldn't look for someone 'to replace someone', but he just had all the qualities I wanted *sigh*
I was going to say something along the lines of 'move on'. But after hearing why you broke up I don't think it would be so bad to see about getting back together.
I wouldn't do anything underhand if there is someone else involved. Just explain to him how you feel and what you want and let him decide what he wants to do. Far better that way than you spend eternity not knowing what could have been if only you'd spoken your mind.
I wouldn't do anything underhand if there is someone else involved. Just explain to him how you feel and what you want and let him decide what he wants to do. Far better that way than you spend eternity not knowing what could have been if only you'd spoken your mind.
Reply 19
luce20
OP
Zurich
I was going to say something along the lines of 'move on'. But after hearing why you broke up I don't think it would be so bad to see about getting back together.
I wouldn't do anything underhand if there is someone else involved. Just explain to him how you feel and what you want and let him decide what he wants to do. Far better that way than you spend eternity not knowing what could have been if only you'd spoken your mind.
I wouldn't do anything underhand if there is someone else involved. Just explain to him how you feel and what you want and let him decide what he wants to do. Far better that way than you spend eternity not knowing what could have been if only you'd spoken your mind.
I was thinking of that but am too scared to say anything. I don't want to mess up the friendship as I know guys like him don't come along every day and hes been a great friend to me.
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