This discussion is now closed.

Check out other Related discussions

boyfriend said he is ashamed to be seen with me.

roma1987

1 year ago my bf said he was uncomfotable being seen wth me as i wasnt the most attractive.

It hurt and caused lots of problems, but we got through it, the thing is i think i never got my confidence back after it.

Past few months i have changed as a person and gone from someone with high confiedence level to a very low one.

My bf was saying how i have changed and im not the person he used to know.

The incident 1 year ago came up again and there were tears. He half tried to console me, i said u dont feel like that now do u, he said, well i do...but its very rare.....he said he feels ashamed when people ask if we are together because i am on the chubby side.

I feel broken, i started crying and he said i should just get over it....we usually sleep in the same bed i came to my own room, before i was in tears, now i just feel numb.

There is no question just needed to speak to someone.

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1

sssdeol1

He sounds like a proper ****.Why are you still with him

Reply 2

Ewan

Ask him why the hell hes still with you if he thinks your unattractive. Does he think your some charity case? Jesus. Time to get rid imo, fast...

Reply 3

username155270

Wow..ur with him because?

Reply 4

roma1987

i didnt know he still felt this way. he says he finds me attractive but he sometimes feels this way.

Reply 5

sssdeol1

Dump him.You shouldn't have to feel like crap just because he has issues

Reply 6

roma1987

ive lost all my friends because of him. i feel so hopeless right now.

Reply 7

Diaz89

are you a roma gypsy?

Reply 8

Philosoraptor

You shouldn't be with him. It's a very bad sign.
Tbh though he may be using you (sorry, don't take it as a personal attack). I would never date someone I didn't find hot and therefore I wouldn't be ashamed to be seen with them.

Reply 9

generic hybrid

He sounds like a total dick. This guy seems to be ruining your self-esteem. Dump him and find someone who deserves you.

Reply 10

Aack

Ditch him.

Reply 11

Vampyrcorn

your boyfriend is crap! most guys won't be like this, you're sure to be able to find somebody better.

Reply 12

AMZB

Wow, what an immature asshole. Dump him. You deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you because he loves you, not because his friends will be impressed that he landed a "hot piece of woman-flesh." If he finds you attractive, it shouldn't matter even slightly whether or not his friends do too. He's the one involved with you, not them.

To make yourself feel less alone and more empowered, read

1. the first letter and response in this column: http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=255893

2. the first letter and response in this column: http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=1148168&view=comments

(Pardon the bad language in the linked articles.)

Also watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTKb0k7W6po&feature=channel_page

Reply 13

amandacalifornia

roma1987

1 year ago my bf said he was uncomfotable being seen wth me as i wasnt the most attractive.

Ok, no offence, but if you were my sister or my close friend, I would absolutely let you have it for staying with this guy a full year after finding out he thinks that.

Why on God's green earth would you think so little of yourself as to stay with someone who is not only embarrassed of you, but tells you so to your face? What, are you just his sure sex until he can find someone better?

You think this guy is ever planning on marrying, or even loving, someone he's ashamed to be seen with? Get the heck out of this hellhole of a relationship before your sense of self is completely decimated.

Reply 14

Elondra

If you stayed with him for a whole year after that comment then, i'm sorry but you have brought it to yourself.

If he did find you attractive he'd be proud to show you off as his girlfriend, not the other way round. Ditch him and find a man who deserves you, there are plenty out there :smile:

Reply 15

*Dreaming*

what a complete dick'ead. I say dump him.
People are supposed to be happy in relationships, and if it just damages your self esteem then what is the point?

Reply 16

Subcutaneous

dump him and be with someone who appreciates you and wants to be with you infront of others

Reply 17

*Corinna*

you deserve much better than him. If my boyfriend ever said something like that to me, I 'd make sure he dies with a slow and painful way !!!

Reply 18

nexttime

From my observations, i think a lot of couples exist not because those involved want them to, but because they either feel that society is pressuring them into 'pairing off' and that having a relationship will gain them some sort of social brownie points, or its an excuse to have easy sex a lot without being considered a slag/having to make an effort.

Classic example here.

Reply 19

nuodai

He sounds like an ********, but I know that people on TSR are often a bit too quick to jump up and say "dump him"... I can imagine if you've been together for over a year you're probably pretty hard to separate even when stuff like this happens. Really, you need to stand up for yourself a bit more instead of just bursting into tears. Ask him why he's still with you if he's so embarrassed to be seen with you, tell him he's being an ********, etc... and if none of the above work, perhaps consider pulling the plug.

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Articles for you

15 things that only happen in university halls

Try out the app

Continue on web