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Comedy chav jokes

Lol i just got this sent to me by email... :biggrin:

1. What do you call a Chav in a box?
Innit.

2. What do you call a Chav in a filing cabinet?
Sorted

3. What do you call a Chav in a box with a lock on it?
Safe.

4. What do you call an Eskimo Chav?
Innuinnit.

5. Why are Chavs like slinkies?
They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down a flight of
stairs.

6. What do you call a Chavette in a white tracksuit?
The bride.

7. You're in your car and you see a Chav on a bike, why should you try
not to hit him? It might be your bike.

8. What's the difference between a Chav and a coconut?
One's thick and hairy, the other's a coconut.

9. What's the first question at a Chav quiz night?
What you lookin' at?"

10. How do you get 100 Chavs into a phone box?
Paint three stripes on it.

11. Two Chavs in a car without any music. Who's driving?
The police

12. What do you call a chav with 9 GCSE's?
A liar.

13. What do you say to a chav with a job?
Can I have a big mac please

14. What do you say to a chav in a suit?
Will the defendant please stand

15. What do u call a knife in chav-ville?
Exhibit A

16. Why is 3 chavs going over a cliff in a Nova a shame?
A Nova seats 4

17. What do you call a 30 year old chavette?
Granny.

18. How many chavs does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, they'll screw anything.

19. What do you call 100 chavs at the bottom of a river?
A start.

20. How many chavs does it take to clean a floor?
None, "That's some uvver bleeders job innit."

21. Why did the chav take a shower?
He didn't mean to, he just forgot to close the Nova's window in the car
wash

22. Why did the Chav cross the road?
To start a fight with a random stranger for no reason whatsoever.

23. What do you call a Chav at college?
The cleaner.

24. A bus full of Chavs were driving through Wales. As they were
approaching Llanfgogogferrinfourasoch they started arguing about the
pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth
until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one Chav
asked the blonde employee, "Before we order, could you settle an
argument
for us?
Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly?" - The blonde
girl leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr-Kiiiiing."

25. Two chavs jump off beachy head, who wins?
Society

lmao

so true

What's Chico Time Precious?

12

I don't really agree with chav bashing, but... :biggrin:

Reply 4

4Ed

OP

15

check this out as well :p:

ha ha ha ha

Stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Reply 7

waiting2smile

2

I am above and over this whole fascination with the exploding chav population. I personally feel one should try their best to not aggravate this unfortunate group, as one day they’ll take over the world and punish us…

:frown:

Reply 8

Bilal

1

waiting2smile

I am above and over this whole fascination with the exploding chav population. I personally feel one should try their best to not aggravate this unfortunate group, as one day they’ll take over the world and punish us…

:frown:

Indeed. But d shall be present on that day, to stop the massacre.

Reply 9

waiting2smile

2

Or maybe he won't. You see if I'm not mistaken d is a closet chav. Poor dears.

Reply 10

Bilal

1

waiting2smile

Or maybe he won't. You see if I'm not mistaken d is a closet chav. Poor dears.

What?!

You'd better delete that post. d is omnipresent after all.

Reply 11

waiting2smile

2

Bilal786

What?!

You'd better delete that post. d is omnipresent after all.

Devout followers? Rubbish! You didn’t even know that very solid piece of information about your wonderful God! If you don't start embracing the chav population by becoming a member of them I fear you will be subjected to d's wrath. Hell, fire, brimstone and all that...best to become an unbeliever in my opinion - you see you're much safer that way - we don't offend because there's no need for us to become chavs.

Reply 12

yo-less

2

4Ed

check this out as well :p:

lol

Reply 13

black_mamba

14

My theory is that chavs dress like each other in order to escape the eminant abuse that comes with walking past a gaggle of the bastards. Join them at your peril.