Advice and thoughts please!

Hey. My boyfriend has quite a tiring job which means he is up at 4am most mornings and hence he is very tired a lot of the time. We have been together 8 months now and i do love him however i cant help feeling that i am bearing the brunt of him being tired a lot of the time. Today for instance he was round mine, we were jst having a quiet evening not really doing much, ive not had a particularly great day so wasnt really up for much n was maybe a bit quiet but then out of the blue he got up n left! I have since asked him whats going on and he said hes tired, gets short tempered when hes tired and had to get out!
I felt quite hurt and angry, particularly as he said he wouldnt come back but at the same time felt bad at myself for feelin that way cos i know how tired he gets! He says he loves me and doesnt wanna finish me but feels guilty cos knows he treats me badly.
Sooo.....what should i do? Is he trying to make me finish him cos he doesnt wanna do it? Is he genuinely jst knackered? Or am i being a doormat?
All opinions welcome!

Reply 1

musicbloke

17

you could just ask him what's up - however strage that thought might be to you. How about having a chat with him about it and explaininbg your feelings.

MB

Reply 2

lil_crazyflakes

12

Yeh, i think to get this matter sorted out you really need to sit down and talk to him about the issue and how you feel. Tell him you understand his tiredness and stuff, but want to know where you stand. Maybe catch him on a day where he is not too tired, or it may just provoke a defensive and angry kind of response. I hope you work it out. Luv lil_crazyflakes x

Reply 3

keano

1

giddychick

....He says he loves me and doesnt wanna finish me but feels guilty cos knows he treats me badly...

my girlfriend finished me cos of that.. :biggrin:

I dont think this post helped you much but just thought it might be worth mentioning..Do not dump him! just talk to him about it.

Reply 4

Raziel

I used to be like that i used to work 3 days after school in the weekdays and start work at 5 every saturday and sunday aswell on top of having school during the week it shattering and is not pretty at all! :frown:

my girlfriend didnt like it either.

Maybe you should try to talk him get him to cut down his hours or start later in the day?something like that normally gets in between people and you obviously care alot about him and this situation, just try and talk to him and make him see your point of view, dont look like you are demanding it, hope everything goes alrite :biggrin:

Reply 5

lil_crazyflakes

12

Hmm, but make sure you're tactful or it could really backfire. Also if he really takes it badly he could resent you for it. Is it a full time job or part time? x

Reply 6

keano

1

if its part time he's gotta be working for a bakery..whatever job it is though 4a.m is hard

Reply 7

giddychick

OP

It is full time and he hates it which also doesnt help as probably 75% of the time he is miserable! I have spoken to him on many occasions and it always comes down to the fact that until he gets another job that is how he is going to be. He his kinda stuck in a rut at the moment, really wants to get out there n find another job but because hes so tired all the time cant seem to muster up the motivation to do anything. Part of me says i shouldnt stand by and get treated like rubbish but then another part says stick by him..he might change.

Reply 8

giddychick

OP

have done that before too, he isnt bothered. Sometimes think he could be depressed as he actually has no motivation to do anything.

Reply 9

Artpur

What would you do if you fund that while comforting a recently bereaved friend your girlfriend went and kissed someone else at a party. A relationship 2 months old... what to do?

Advice and thoughts please!

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