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My boyfriend is making me not want to eat. watch

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    (Original post by Stratos)
    not that i care but eating 2 meals actually makes you gain weight as the metabolism slows down therefore I advice you not to skip meals and eat snacks in between. and ur bf is a jackass if he makes you feel bad.
    No, eating more calories makes you gain weight. If she's cut out one meal from her diet and not altered the other, she'll lose weight - the effect of metabolism is dwarfed by cutting out a significant portion of your daily intake.

    This is definitely something you should confront your boyfriend over. At size 6 and ~18 BMI, you can't lose any significant amount of weight without it having some sort of effect on your health, and if you're doing plenty of exercise already it seems pretty implausible that there could be issues with your body due to being skinny-fat and lacking in muscle.

    It seems pretty unlikely that your boyfriend is actively trying to cause you problems, but it does sound like he's got a pretty warped view of what a healthy female body should be like which he needs to be straightened out on. I can understand a man wanting his girlfriend to lose weight and live a more healthy lifestyle if she's overweight and doesn't exercise much because that's not a selfish aim - it'll help her be happier and healthier, even if it does also please him directly because she'll look better - but I don't get how a man could be making these sorts of comments to a girl of your size and not realise he's being totally unreasonable.
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    Sounds like you have a budding control freak on your hands. Get rid ASAP.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for all the replies guys.

    I dunno why I am doing it, I really dont want to lose him, he makes me feel secure, but well then he brings my insecurities out.

    I dont want to lose any more weight, or my mum will tell the doctor that I am anorexic, which I am not - well i dont think Im fat, but well he does.
    Well dont dump him straight away talk to him about it first.
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    Troll time again.
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    Leave him and find a man who loves your body for what it is.
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    If this is true, then good God girl.. Dump the wierdo. It's not rocket science.
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    Poor thing! You sound beautiful dump the guy its going to make you feel awful in the long run
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    Wow he controls your life.
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    DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM
    he sounds like a riiiiight jerk.
    youre so too good for him.
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    Your boyfriend is a bully, get rid of him.

    Any man worth his salt who was in to you wouldn't be thinking anything other than getting you naked and keeping you that way, and not commenting on your weight.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    **Anon please, Personal issues**

    I am quite skinny at the moment (size 6, BMI 17.8) but I have always been really skinny, I have never looked unhealthy though, as I am really small and have a tiny frame.

    I generally ate about 3 meals a day (cereal, salad/ jacket potato/ and then I have different things for dinner- normally something with fish or pasta as I dont like red meat) and then I just have fruit and smoothies)

    I also do about 8 hours excercise a week, so I have always been in good shape.

    Anyway, I have been with my boyfriend for about 2 months now, and I decided to have sex with him about 3 weeks ago, I wasnt a virgin, but my first experience was a bad one so I try to forget it.

    Anyway so all was fine, but like whenever I am naked he makes me feel really bad, like he will pinch my bum and say something like "putting it on a bit arent we" and like I hardly ever eat chocolate but i was going to have one bar and he was all "are you sure you want that".

    And when we go shopping, if I have to get a size 8, he always makes me try on the six to see if I can squeeze in to it.

    I swim and dance, but he reckons I need to go to the gym with him for 6 hours a week as well to make sure I stay a small size.

    So like in the last 2 weeks I have just been eating 2 meals (breakfast and lunch)

    And doing my 8 hours dance + swimming + 5 hours in the gym, I dont want to, but I love him so much and I dont want to offend him with all my fat - although everyone apart from him always says I am too skinny, but he is the one I love, so I am trying to lose more weight.

    All my family are really conserned about me, and want to send me to a psychiatrist, but there isnt anything wrong with me, I just want to make him happy.
    please please dont do this, i am someone who sleeps with as many girls as i can, never commit and cheat on girls when in the rare occassion i do commit. And even i wouldn't try and make a girl loose weight or fit into smaller clothes just to please me, he must be a right slimey *******, your best of to get rid and get someone who'll have you as you are (by the way a size 8 isn't fat, so theres no way you need to loose weight)
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    He's just one of these guys who gets turned on by controlling his girlfriend through abuse. You need to get rid of him before it gets worse and worse and worse.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    I dont want to offend him with all my fat - although everyone apart from him always says I am too skinny, but he is the one I love, so I am trying to lose more weight.


    Fat?! What fat? Your a size 8, and prolly have little or no fat considering you swim, dance and exercise, it's prolly muscle. As you said yourself - you're in good shape, so why let someone change that? If you're happy as yourself, be yourself - don't let anyone change that. Either defy his 'loose weightyness' or dump his ass. He should love you for who you are, not what he wants you to be
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    don't let someone who you've only been dating for 2 months take over your life. this tool is not worth it at all.
    your partner is meant to make you happy, not make you feel insecure with yourself.
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    and he seems like the one who's insecure and then putting that on you. you don't need that.
    if he loved you he wouldn't be so insensitive, rude and well, a total idiot towards you.
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    "My boyfriend is a ********"

    Repeat 10 times in the morning, and 10 times before bed.
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    jesus christ- dump him!!
    sounds like a real wan**r!

    if anyone, boyfriend or not, started pinching my ass telling me I'd put on weight, or any of the other things you mentioned- i tell him to F++* right off!

    to 'love' men who treat women the way your boyfriend treats you is insulting and degrading to women in general. and love in general.
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    Don't change yourself for him, honestly. A boyfriend who makes you insecure and unhappy, is no good boyfriend at all. Have a conversation with him, tell him exactly what's on your mind and how ******* terrible you feel. He deserves to know, if he really cares about you and your health.
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    Tbf I would just talk to him about it. He's probably joking and doesn't think you're actually taking him seriously.
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    I'm really sorry to hear about this, I know weight is for a lot of girls a big issue, but in this case, it isn't your issue.
    Ok so you said you were a bit skinnier when you met him so maybe he is trying to get you back to the size you were then through what I would call mental abuse. You need to put him straight on two things a) you are happy to have gained a little weight, you're healthier and fitter and b) what he is doing has to stop- its having a detrimental effect on your wellbeing.
    I know everyone says dump him and that is my instant reaction, but maybe you should talk to him first. This could go a number of ways- he could deny it all, admit it and show no remorse or genuinely feel sorry for making you feel this way but either way, stay strong, let him explain himself and if you don't like what he has to say don't be afraid to get rid!
    Good luck
 
 
 
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