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What does this text/facebook message mean? watch

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    #1

    I KNOW how annoying these threads are, I know... :sigh: Humour me, plz.

    Err so me this guy at college chat sometimes, and he was like (on fbook), we should meet up sometime over the holidays. So I said, yeah okay, and he gave me his number and so we text fairly regularly. Then yesterday he was asking me what I was up to and stuff, and then said 'do you want to go out next week', and he's never phrased it like that before but that doesn't mean it's a proper date does it?
    I don't have many male friends, and I think of him as a friend, not someone I fancy, so I want to meet up just to hang out, DEFINITELY NOT as a date. But since I don't have much experience in these matters, i'm not sure if he fancies me? I definitely don't want to flatter myself because i'm nothing special at all, but I just want an outside opinion of what it sounds like?
    I can't slip in 'we're just meeting as friends aren't we' because how embarassing would it be on the chance he would reply 'err right, why would I fancy you?!'

    I've not replied yet, I dunno what to do?!

    I can't 'talk to him' about it either since I don't know him that well enough and also for the reason above.

    :o:
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    I think keep it cool. Then after the "date" you'll know if its was a date in the first place.

    Have fun
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    He's into you. Best to make it clear from the start if that's not what you want.
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    Then phrase your reply as:

    "Sure, I'm not doing anything next week. When do you want to hang out?" That way, you leave it open for him to come out with the awkward "I well fancy you", but also manage to show him that you're just there to 'hang out', you're not there on a date.

    To be honest, I see your reaction as being a bit awkward with the whole sitch, but, if you're up for just going somewhere, use the key word "hang out" - it puts him in his place, for a bit at least, while he works out what he's going to do. I've had times where I've used the phrasing "Want to go out next week?" but it doesn't mean I'm expecting it to be a date; I've had times where I've asked people to hang out, and hoped it would go further. Inner machinations of a person are hard to read. Just stick to the "Sure...when....hang out" reply for now; don't overcomplicate things until after you and him have spent a few hours together. [Don't want to scare the poor chap off ;D]
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    If your hot hes in to you if your ugly then hes not.
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    I doubt that he would just want to hang out with a girl that he didn't fancy at all.
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    (Original post by CatatonicStupor)
    Then phrase your reply as:

    "Sure, I'm not doing anything next week. When do you want to hang out?" That way, you leave it open for him to come out with the awkward "I well fancy you", but also manage to show him that you're just there to 'hang out', you're not there on a date.

    To be honest, I see your reaction as being a bit awkward with the whole sitch, but, if you're up for just going somewhere, use the key word "hang out" - it puts him in his place, for a bit at least, while he works out what he's going to do. I've had times where I've used the phrasing "Want to go out next week?" but it doesn't mean I'm expecting it to be a date; I've had times where I've asked people to hang out, and hoped it would go further. Inner machinations of a person are hard to read. Just stick to the "Sure...when....hang out" reply for now; don't overcomplicate things until after you and him have spent a few hours together. [Don't want to scare the poor chap off ;D]
    Very well put :thumbsup:
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    Just go along with it and see how it goes. You don't know his intentions.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by CatatonicStupor)
    Then phrase your reply as:

    "Sure, I'm not doing anything next week. When do you want to hang out?" That way, you leave it open for him to come out with the awkward "I well fancy you", but also manage to show him that you're just there to 'hang out', you're not there on a date.

    To be honest, I see your reaction as being a bit awkward with the whole sitch, but, if you're up for just going somewhere, use the key word "hang out" - it puts him in his place, for a bit at least, while he works out what he's going to do. I've had times where I've used the phrasing "Want to go out next week?" but it doesn't mean I'm expecting it to be a date; I've had times where I've asked people to hang out, and hoped it would go further. Inner machinations of a person are hard to read. Just stick to the "Sure...when....hang out" reply for now; don't overcomplicate things until after you and him have spent a few hours together. [Don't want to scare the poor chap off ;D]
    Thanks for this, i'd rep if I wasn't anonymous! That sounds good, it's probably more likely that he just thinks the same as me, and we're just getting to be better friends anyway.

    (Original post by Psycho0101)
    I doubt that he would just want to hang out with a girl that he didn't fancy at all.
    But I want to hang out with him and I don't fancy him at all.
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    Have fun on your date
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    Best say now or after when he's embarresed he will say'well you led me on'
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    (Original post by Gibb~)
    Best say now or after when he's embarresed he will say'well you led me on'
    Say what now though? I don't want to be presumptuous in case he feels exactly the same way as me!

    (Original post by Harfarin)
    Please don't lead him on, I'd rather have the awkward confession of you not fancying me rather than leave it late still thinking I had a chance.
    Maybe text him something along lines of... "Sure why not? What do you have planned? I hope it's not a date right? "

    Lets him know where you stand, saves the awkwardness to texts and gives him next move..
    I can't really say 'I hope it's not a date right?' cos we're not that close to be joking about that really and he might think i'm full of myself for assuming...:o:
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    (Original post by sssdeol1)
    If your hot hes in to you if your ugly then hes not.
    Sound advice, there.
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    (Original post by CatatonicStupor)
    Then phrase your reply as:

    "Sure, I'm not doing anything next week. When do you want to hang out?" That way, you leave it open for him to come out with the awkward "I well fancy you", but also manage to show him that you're just there to 'hang out', you're not there on a date.

    To be honest, I see your reaction as being a bit awkward with the whole sitch, but, if you're up for just going somewhere, use the key word "hang out" - it puts him in his place, for a bit at least, while he works out what he's going to do. I've had times where I've used the phrasing "Want to go out next week?" but it doesn't mean I'm expecting it to be a date; I've had times where I've asked people to hang out, and hoped it would go further. Inner machinations of a person are hard to read. Just stick to the "Sure...when....hang out" reply for now; don't overcomplicate things until after you and him have spent a few hours together. [Don't want to scare the poor chap off ;D]
    Nicely put
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    I'm sure ur date will go fine, chilax.
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    It might not be a date. I met a guy a couple weeks ago by chance and we exchanged numbers etc after a few hours and a couple days later he sent me the same text as you - "wanna meet up". I ended up going round to his and we watched a couple movies and (*shock* *horror*!!!) that's exactly what we did, watched movies and chatted for a few hours.
    Just because a guy asks you to meet up doesn't necessarily mean it's a date.

    Although my dad was pretty annoyed that I was going round to the house of a guy I'd only met once before lol.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for this, i'd rep if I wasn't anonymous! That sounds good, it's probably more likely that he just thinks the same as me, and we're just getting to be better friends anyway.
    It's no prob. I'm usually better at giving advice to people about their relationships than giving myself advice, which is why I end up perpetually single. Lush :cool:
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    You could allways suggest you take a friend with you, thats a stone cold "i only think of you as a friend"
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Beige_Angel)
    It might not be a date. I met a guy a couple weeks ago by chance and we exchanged numbers etc after a few hours and a couple days later he sent me the same text as you - "wanna meet up". I ended up going round to his and we watched a couple movies and (*shock* *horror*!!!) that's exactly what we did, watched movies and chatted for a few hours.
    Just because a guy asks you to meet up doesn't necessarily mean it's a date.

    Although my dad was pretty annoyed that I was going round to the house of a guy I'd only met once before lol.
    he wanted it to be a date, but worked out you werent interested on the course of it - he could havewatched FILMS on his own
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I KNOW how annoying these threads are, I know... :sigh: Humour me, plz.

    Err so me this guy at college chat sometimes, and he was like (on fbook), we should meet up sometime over the holidays. So I said, yeah okay, and he gave me his number and so we text fairly regularly. Then yesterday he was asking me what I was up to and stuff, and then said 'do you want to go out next week', and he's never phrased it like that before but that doesn't mean it's a proper date does it?
    I don't have many male friends, and I think of him as a friend, not someone I fancy, so I want to meet up just to hang out, DEFINITELY NOT as a date. But since I don't have much experience in these matters, i'm not sure if he fancies me? I definitely don't want to flatter myself because i'm nothing special at all, but I just want an outside opinion of what it sounds like?
    I can't slip in 'we're just meeting as friends aren't we' because how embarassing would it be on the chance he would reply 'err right, why would I fancy you?!'

    I've not replied yet, I dunno what to do?!

    I can't 'talk to him' about it either since I don't know him that well enough and also for the reason above.

    :o:
    id just leave quite a casula text or facebook message just saying 'yes, where and when?' and then see what happens, im pretty sure you'll be able to tell from a) where he wants to take you or b) how he acts when your there what he wants, then you can decide whether to say something or not. for all you know, he might just want to meet up as friends after all, good luck
 
 
 
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