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not wanting to 'do stuff'? watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    that seems a bit harsh to me- to break it off with a girl no matter what else she has going for her, just because she has any trouble putting out

    what about girls who aren't 'shy' because they have no self-respect/don't think twice about whether the guy is having a good time?
    I think it's quite a turn on to a guy to have a girl who is a 'fresh canvas'. If he's worth it, he'll be considerate and not have a problem offering you advice on what to do. Afterall, he can then 'train' you to how he likes it
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    (Original post by JackDaniels^)
    You think too much. I rarely ever give this advice but you should do more and think less.
    haha- that actually applies to my life in general

    ok- something else I probably think to much about but is as much of a problem here as confidence- knowing what to do 'down there'- general consensus seems to be natural is a turn off, but completely shaved is unecessary. If I'm honest, it doesn't bother me (on me or the guy)- so what is the best thing to do with it so it won't be a turn off and won't look weird?
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    (Original post by a_t)
    A girl you're with that's not putting out isn't a gf, she's just a female friend, I have enough of those
    ok fair enough- its called a sexual relationship for a reason.
    I meant more that it's harsh to dump a girl the second she is 'shy' about having sex- if a girl is plain frigid then ok, but girls tend to get more insecure about sex than boys-some just need a little encouragement.

    (Original post by a_t)
    Yeah... most girl who put out lack self respect

    Your notions about sex are skewed to be honest
    ok- maybe I didn't make my point very well, but I was trying to say there are two ends of the spectrum- its no good being frigid or over-thinking things (like I'm liable to do) but there are other faults girls can have, like readily having sex with whoever and doing whatever the man wants them to do because they're desperate/slutty/thoughtless. and I think it should count for something when someone actually cares whether the other person is enjoying it
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    a) guys have needs
    Yes we do, but we also have emotions and a brain - so shock horror, we can be very understanding.

    I think you ethos of waiting until your in a steady relationship is a good one and one which you shouldn't try to 'work around'.
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    (Original post by JackDaniels^)
    You might wanna give me a call when you're in town so I know when I have to worry that my parked car can be hit any second
    Come to think about it.. I would hold a grudge if you hit my car!
    haha i wouldn't worry too much- i've only ever hit a parked car once... lamposts and trees are more my speciality
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    (Original post by a_t)
    I dunno about advice but a heads up any use to you?

    Theres nothing embarassing about sex and getting physically intimate, stop being so uptight and let loose a bit

    Also if I was seeing a girl and realized she was shy about this sort of stuff, I'd just leave her, there and then
    You wouldnt, you would be damm glad you had managed to get a girl in bed. If you think im wrong look in the mirror...........

    Anyway, OP; just relax and enjoy it. When your in a relationship the guy will sort of guide you through it and practice makes perfect, nobody is going to turn down a blowjob cos - in your opinion, your crap. If you feel happy in yourself, the rest of it can be learnt.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    sorry- I'm sure there are threads along this line every day...
    it feels incredibly cringing writing this, but any responses would be very welcome:

    I am not a virgin, and I've only had sex on 2 occasions, both one night stands with boys I didn't really know, both when I was off my face. I'm 19 and I've never had a boyfriend or anything really.

    I always feel reluctant to go out with boys I like, because I would find it really awkward if they started trying to mess around- by which I mean any kind of foreplay, mainly because It's not something I particularly want to do, and I have 0 confidence trying things out (I'm generally bad at everything apart from kissing).

    I basically feel, if we're not in a serious relationship, I don't want to do anything, because it would make me feel really embarrassed and ruin whatever we had going.

    any advice on how to get round this?
    I know any guy worth having would be considerate and not put pressure on me, but a) guys have needs and b) I would completely be up for having a sexual relationship if I get used to the idea and feel confident I know what I'm doing
    much better
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    (Original post by ronaldo91)
    much better
    hhaahaha liking it :laugh:

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    how bad is it to want to get 'practice' when I'm really drunk and work up to doing things sober
    seemed to work for me when I had a similar fear about kissing when I was 14..
    Also yeah, as Yellowpolkadotbikini said, having 'practice' when you're smashed will probably make things easier for you. My first time was a one night stand and it definitely made things less awkward and scarier for me the next time round. But in theory people will probably disagree and say you shouldn't have random one night stands just for practice. Each to their own I say.
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    (Original post by yellowpolkadotbikini)
    haha i wouldn't worry too much- i've only ever hit a parked car once... lamposts and trees are more my speciality
    Well, I must confess I once hit a parked car too
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    I think your shyness puts boys off, rather than the person you actually are
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    (Original post by Blue.China)
    Also yeah, as Yellowpolkadotbikini said, having 'practice' when you're smashed will probably make things easier for you. My first time was a one night stand and it definitely made things less awkward and scarier for me the next time round. But in theory people will probably disagree and say you shouldn't have random one night stands just for practice. Each to their own I say.
    I didn't mean more random one night stands- I meant having sex with whoever it is I'm with when I'm drunk
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    (Original post by JackDaniels^)
    Well, I must confess I once hit a parked car too
    oohhhh... we are terrible people! i'm sure it was down to their rubbish parking and not ours anyway though
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I basically feel, if we're not in a serious relationship, I don't want to do anything, because it would make me feel really embarrassed and ruin whatever we had going.
    Your not making any sense. If it's not a serious relationship then it wont really ruin anything you had going anyway??? :confused:
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    Also you sound like a bit of a ho!!!! Make sure you use contraception. I'm not paying for you and your whore-baby!
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    (Original post by yellowpolkadotbikini)
    oohhhh... we are terrible people! i'm sure it was down to their rubbish parking and not ours anyway though
    So true. I didn't wait till the owner of the car was back to argue whose fault it was though I also have the feeling that the 'anonymous girl' who started this topic is not really interested in our driving skills. We might make her insecure about getting her driver's licence too :p:
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    (Original post by JackDaniels^)
    So true. I didn't wait till the owner of the car was back to argue whose fault it was though I also have the feeling that the 'anonymous girl' who started this topic is not really interested in our driving skills. We might make her insecure about getting her driver's licence too :p:
    aaaaah me neither..!! we are terrible people. i was left with the momento of some of their paint across the back of my car though, hapyp days. how could anyone not be interested in our driving skills?! they are clearly far superior to everyone elses.. :p:
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    (Original post by God of War)
    Your not making any sense. If it's not a serious relationship then it wont really ruin anything you had going anyway??? :confused:
    um...because serious relationships take time to develop?
    and relationships that aren't going anywhere and are just fun or aren't serious but could be are worth something too!

    by 'serious' I mean when you love eachother or at least know eachother really well
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    (Original post by yellowpolkadotbikini)
    aaaaah me neither..!! we are terrible people. i was left with the momento of some of their paint across the back of my car though, hapyp days. how could anyone not be interested in our driving skills?! they are clearly far superior to everyone elses.. :p:
    Because someone here said that having sex is as easy as parking a car. Now, imagine she has a driver's licence, then she's probably sh*t at parking a car because she's a girl (no offense to your superior driving skills of course ). That also means she's sh*t at having sex, where she's so very insecure about ALREADY:p:

    by 'serious' I mean when you love eachother or at least know eachother really well
    In that case I don't really think your boyfriend minds if you're insecure about yourself the first time. Unless you really stay horrible at it after 100 times, I don't see the problem here. And as been said before, it's as easy as parking a car so eh... nevermind:p:

    Seriously, don't be afraid of it. It'll work out, trust me.
    Practice makes perfect:p:
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    (Original post by JackDaniels^)
    Because someone here said that having sex is as easy as parking a car. Now, imagine she has a driver's licence, then she's probably sh*t at parking a car because she's a girl (no offense to your superior driving skills of course ). That also means she's sh*t at having sex, where she's so very insecure about ALREADY:p:
    oh yeh....! completley flawless reasoning there, meaning we are in fact probably not only terrible people, but the WORST PEOPLE EVER!!! never mind
 
 
 
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