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How to politely say "I'm not interested, stop it!"? Watch

    • #1
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    #1

    Please keep anon or delete.

    Hey guys,

    I've tried to post this a while ago but I don't think my post worked.
    Anyways, I'm a girl(18) and there is this guy(16) who is kinda creeping me out now by his constant tries of wanting to go out with me.

    Now, he isn't from my school but we're from the same city, I first came across him at a science/UCAS conference. He literally went up to me and started a convo with me.
    I'm fine with meeting new people so talked, then he asked for my email "so [he] could ask me questions about the courses"; I thought, "fair enough" and gave it to him.
    Then he added me on MSN, we talked, but then I sensed from his messages that he's probably interested in me, so i tried to hint that it's not going to work by telling him "I'm 18 and you're like..16? It's a BIG difference.". Still, that didn't seem to have putted him off. One day heasked whether I'd like to meet up to just talk about doing sciences at uni as he's quite confused about it. Well, I thought may be he needs actual guidance so I agreed(and I'm sort of like a "uni advisor" at school anyways).

    it turned out to be quite like a date, he was offering to buy me stuff and etc as well trying to ask me about science courses. I was really annoyed by that and made up an excuse and went home.

    He keeps texting me, phoning me and chatting to me on msn, at first I texted back and talked, but then realised he's still besotted with me and just stopped having any contacts with him, hoping that he'll eventually just give up and realise it.

    ...But he didn't. Carried on trying to contact me, he even found out which school I go to, added me on face book and etc. Sent me PMs on FB asking for my address and etc. A few times he even appeared outside the school gate waiting for me.
    when i saw him, I try to act politely, making up excuses that I'm VERY busy and I can't help with anything atm.

    He just doesn't seem to get the message that "I'm NOT interested, please just go away". This has been going on for more than half a year now. I'm getting pretty scared that he's like a stalker and will eventualyl do something to me.

    What should I do to stop it? How can I just say it politely without causing any grudge/hatred to him to "stop following me!"?
    I don't want this to go on any further! HELP!
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    You have tried being subtle, and that didn't work, so maybe try being more direct. Tell him that you don't want to have a relationship at the moment or something so that he isn't upset.
    Good luck
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    Tell him that you have a boyfriend
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    Maybe say to him that it seems he needs a lot more help to do with his uni courses than you can really provide. Then suggest he speaks to connexions or something like that?

    Failing that, i'd politely say to him that you feel the constant texting/calling/meeting you outside school is unnecessary. Tell him that if he wants you to remain friends (Stress the friends part) That he should give you more space.

    It's best to just keep in his good books rather than make him angry as he seems a bit dodgy
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    I think he will appreciate it if you are direct and honest with him, i know i would be even if it hurt a little, i think it would be alot more stress to not know where i stood then know.

    Tell him how you feel, obviously in a nice way say you dont see him in that way, and you think you should live your own lives etc...
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    You just said it (in the title) - that sounded pretty polite to me. Depends on your tone of voice I guess - just be firm, not rude, and don't budge an inch. Make sure he can see no loopholes, without sounding overdramatic.
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    Be careful, it sounds like the beginning of your relationship with a senile rapist.
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    Cut all contact with him..delete his number/block his number, take him off facebook etc and if you see him in person again just say that you don't want to talk anymore. Be blunt or he'll never get it.
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    The guy has probably misunderstood all your hints, like giving him your number, email address and meeting up with him. Excuses can sometimes be pointless if the guy is so blinded by his own feelings.

    He is going to be hurt, no matter what you say. So I would suggest maybe emailing him and explain your feelings and that you are don't think you should meet up again. (guys can't be friends with people they are infatuated with)
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    Translate " I'm not interested , stop it ! "

    Into

    " I'm not interested , stop please ! "
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    (Original post by sarubobo28)
    Tell him that you have a boyfriend
    this is the only way i've seen it work.
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    You've already tried to subtly tell him to **** off, so you should probably just actually tell him next time
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    Next time he rings get a male friend to answer and say. This call is been recorded by XX (yor area) Police Force as evidence, you are now been connected.

    See if it scares him off.
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    Perhaps actually telling him would help.
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    (Original post by rosieee91)
    Cut all contact with him..delete his number/block his number, take him off facebook etc and if you see him in person again just say that you don't want to talk anymore. Be blunt or he'll never get it.
    :yep: this is what i usually do, its just easiest. f you can't say "I don't want to talk to you any more" ( like me) just say you're busy, he'll get the picture eventually...
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    Get one of your guy friends to kiss you / act like a boyfriend infront of him. That should give him the idea.
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    (Original post by sarubobo28)
    You made me lol :p:



    #17...
    Lmao !

    What's #17 btw

    :p:
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    (Original post by forever_dreamer)
    You have tried being subtle, and that didn't work, so maybe try being more direct. Tell him that you don't want to have a relationship at the moment or something so that he isn't upset.
    Good luck
    Do NOT say that, as that indicates that you might be interested in having a relationship later on (that's how he will interpret it). Just tell him that you're not interested in him. It's really not that hard. You don't have to be mean about it, but you will have to say it in a way so that there's no confusion at all as to what you mean.
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    http://leelanau2010.files.wordpress....-says-gtfo.jpg
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by chic)
    Do NOT say that, as that indicates that you might be interested in having a relationship later on (that's how he will interpret it). Just tell him that you're not interested in him. It's really not that hard. You don't have to be mean about it, but you will have to say it in a way so that there's no confusion at all as to what you mean.
    This.

    I really don't get the just ignoring him thing. It just means he will be confused about it. And Its not nice being ignored. I'd rather be told (I'm going through this myself atm, an ex who it looked like we were getting back together, and now she's started ignoring me).

    Ignoring him is just being *****y IMO.

    (anon please, as my friend's don't know about said ex).
 
 
 
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