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would you be annoyed if your bf was like this? watch

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    words can't describe how annoyed i'd be
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    (Original post by Dodo XD)
    I think were reaching some sort of level playing field here...I believe that if you're not happy in a relationship, then you should go find yourself another. Neither do i, and that's why i said i was going out on a whim...
    Haha ok we agree the guy is not someone the OP would want to be in a relationship with, and that it isn't just her being paranoid that she felt unwanted etc? Lol I dunno why we were arguing in that case :p:

    Don't think theres any point trying to second guess if the OP is exaggerating or not, you will never know and it doesn't achieve anything really.
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    (Original post by Irrelevance)
    Flipping everything around for a female partner:

    No
    No - in essence, asking for space is pretty much telling me they're annoyed.
    No
    No
    And no.

    Problem in bold. Being paranoid is a bad thing and expecting people to cope with it is quite selfish.
    What i should add is that he messed me around when i was sort of seeing him. he slept with someone else and then they were **** buddies. he came back to me donw the line for a proper relationship. he gave me reasons to not trust him. i felt very insecure that he didnt care and so i picked up on the signals that were in my first post.
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    (Original post by Trigger)
    Doesnt text you good morning or goodnight-grow up
    when hes annoyed at you, he doesnt say, he just wants space-thats his choice
    only has sex about once a week-ask him
    is out with friends every single night-why dont you go?
    doesnt put kisses in texts-grow up
    can go a whole day without talking to you-are you bothering him?

    You got there before i did

    It sounds like you have a serious insecurity issue YOU need to address before having a proper relationship. And also stop going after douche bags.
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    (Original post by Dagowly)
    You got there before i did

    It sounds like you have a serious insecurity issue YOU need to address before having a proper relationship. And also stop going after douche bags.
    What i should add is that he messed me around when i was sort of seeing him. he slept with someone else and then they were **** buddies. he came back to me donw the line for a proper relationship. he gave me reasons to not trust him. i felt very insecure that he didnt care and so i picked up on the signals that were in my first post. Still think i had no reason to be paranoid over what i was?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What i should add is that he messed me around when i was sort of seeing him. he slept with someone else and then they were **** buddies. he came back to me donw the line for a proper relationship. he gave me reasons to not trust him. i felt very insecure that he didnt care and so i picked up on the signals that were in my first post.
    With this new information, you knew he was a ******* but still carried on a relationship with him. Alright, sure. People can very rarely change but if he carried on being such a ****, why did you carry on dating him?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Doesnt text you good morning or goodnight
    when hes annoyed at you, he doesnt say, he just wants space
    only has sex about once a week
    is out with friends every single night
    doesnt put kisses in texts
    can go a whole day without talking to you
    To be honest I think you can have a very healthy relationship without the good morning or good night texts, putting kisses at the end of texts and going a whole day without communication. However, the others are fair enough, sex once a week isn't all that bad but if it was like that EVERY week yeah it'd be a bit dull! Men are typically uptight about their emotions, but I think we should make it known we're annoyed. For the other one it really depends on what his friends are like.

    It's a tough balance, you can't be too clingy as a boyfriend or else women usually get sick of you (unless they are equally so) and if you're too distant it can also fall apart...

    ...I'm rambling now :P point is, sometimes it's good to just chill and be relaxed with each other rather than being around them showing constant affection 24/7 and making the intimate moments a bit less special.
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    (Original post by Irrelevance)
    With this new information, you knew he was a ******* but still carried on a relationship with him. Alright, sure. People can very rarely change but if he carried on being such a ****, why did you carry on dating him?
    because me and him wernt technically in a relationship then. I thought he would be a good boyfriend, he said she was just a friend with benefits, thought i ddint want a relationship with him, wasnt sure if he wanted a relationship, he had always liked me and said he is done with being a ********.

    so let me get this straight.. to get annoyed at the things i mentioned before, (as a whole not as individual things) i was wrong to because it didnt mean someone didnt like me or want me etc... but in these circumstances.. i had a right to?
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    I worry in my relationships that I'm being too clingy, but I'd never text good mornings or goodnights or put kisses in texts, that's too much!
    The ideal situation is where the couple give each other a bit more attention than normal friends but less than they would to best friends.
    You sound like a very nervous girl wondering if your boyfriend is thinking about you constantly. And it's unfair to expect that of anyone.
    Truth is intense relationships tend to burn out in a wink as the couple get tired of each other.
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    (Original post by Abhead)
    Haha ok we agree the guy is not someone the OP would want to be in a relationship with, and that it isn't just her being paranoid that she felt unwanted etc? Lol I dunno why we were arguing in that case :p:

    Don't think theres any point trying to second guess if the OP is exaggerating or not, you will never know and it doesn't achieve anything really.
    That's all up to her really, all i am saying is that guys aren't as sensitive, emotional, etc. etc. and that they can act irrationally without explanation and that us women shouldn't always overreact...
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    (Original post by Wenzel)
    OP, do you watch a lot of Hollywood romance movies or something? You're been a little unrealistic with your expectations...
    This. Jeez.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    so let me get this straight.. to get annoyed at the things i mentioned before, (as a whole not as individual things) i was wrong to because it didnt mean someone didnt like me or want me etc... but in these circumstances.. i had a right to?
    Not particularly. You technically don't have a 'right' to anything especially when you were in a bad relationship and didn't end it. If it's that bad and falls so short of your expectations, it's only common sense to end it and find somebody who fits the bill (even if they're a little unrealistic).

    It sounds you like fell for the "I fancy him because he fancies me" bait and then ended up learning the hard way that *******s really will always be *******s and that if you appear to be an exception to this rule, you're missing something.
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    (Original post by Irrelevance)
    Not particularly. You technically don't have a 'right' to anything especially when you were in a bad relationship and didn't end it. If it's that bad and falls so short of your expectations, it's only common sense to end it and find somebody who fits the bill (even if they're a little unrealistic).

    It sounds you like fell for the "I fancy him because he fancies me" bait and then ended up learning the hard way that *******s really will always be *******s and that if you appear to be an exception to this rule, you're missing something.

    But like lots of other people on here said, i overreacted and was just paranoid. Thats what i thought it would be, in which case, i just expect too much and should tone it down. I took the examples as a whole that he didnt like me much. All i needed was to be told i was just being stupid from people to realise that there is nothing wrong with the relationship. i was only unhappy because i interpreted things as him not caring. After realising that i would have been fine witht he relationship.

    its all very complicated. he asked me for a relationship, i said no, and then this other girl came along. so technically i am to blame. but it was very soon after, and me and him were still going somewhere, i was just about to tell him i had changed my mind and did want a relationship with him (it all happened within a week or so). he used excuses about being on the rebound and i remembered i had once rejected him, so i thought he would be decent as a boyfriend.

    what do u mean a bad relationship? you said i expect too much and overreacted (or something like that) and then say i was in a bad relationship
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    it was just that we had only been together a month and i thought couples are susposed to show they really lkike eachother and spend loads of time together at the beginning of a relationship
    go with your instinct...it sounds like you feel there's someone out there who could get closer to giving you what you want

    also though, whatever you do, do work on your own confidence as it will make it a lot easier to rationalise how you feel about how men respond to you....eg the amount of sex you have doesn't quantify the extent to which you are fancied

    good luck because your worries make sense and are all relatable
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    You expected all of this within the first MONTH? I hope this is a joke.
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    sounds pretty perfect to me...
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    Ew, I'd rather not be texted good morning or goodnight every day to be honest.
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    No, why on earth would i be annoyed for such trivial things? You sound clingy OP.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Its not about the inidividual things! its about what they represent as a whole!
    As a whole, i wouldn't be that bothered, but i can see where you're coming from i have a friend who is kinda like you...i just grew up in a family that never really bothered with each other so i like a lot of space in relationships.
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    Doesnt text you good morning or goodnight- good! he might wake me up!

    when hes annoyed at you, he doesnt say, he just wants space- some people are just like that, especially lads. just accept it and leave him alone for five mins!

    only has sex about once a week- everyone has different sex drives. if you really liked him why are your bothered?

    is out with friends every single night- its good to see hes got his priorities right!

    doesnt put kisses in texts- i expect kisses on texts but only because i dont expect texts every day from my bf!

    can go a whole day without talking to you- one day is NOTHING. he does has a life outside of you, right?

    you definatley expected waaay too much from him, especially if you were only going out for a month! if i got loads of texts everyday and have to go out with my bf everyday without him falling out with me, i would have ran a mile! me and my bf have been together for more than two years and i think we get on so well because neither of us are clingy! even now when both of us have finished college and have nothing to do, we probably only see eachother no more than three or four times a week, (and it would probably be a little less if our friends didnt hang out together!) im not surprised you only lasted one month!!
 
 
 
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