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    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    ok some of ur posts were just stupid and il ignore them.

    i find talking abt this topic with her really lame as these sort of things should happen on its own. but it doesnt. i cant be asking for everything for the rest of my life can i?..

    and for those who think i am young or immature, i am 20yrs old and she is 19, so this 'should' be a strong relationship however it is not.
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    Um....okay seriously, if she doesn't want to do it it shouldn't be a reason to end it with her?!?! If you genuinely like her then it shouldn't matter what she's comfortable with. If you weren't comfortable doing something physical, would you want her to end it if you weren't prepared to do it?
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    Your'e Gf should never have to be forced to do anything, if she doesn't want thousands of knuckle children in her mouth thats her decision. You'll regret forcing her to do it only to find out that shes ******* awful at doing it.
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    (Original post by farhan)
    Dump her bro. She can't be having that sort of attitude problem.
    Why would he dump her? That's a ridiculous suggestion.
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    I hardly ever gave my first bf oral. I was really nervous about it, he kept going on about it and did the not so smooth grabbing-my-head-and-pushing-it-towards-his-**** routine. His behaviour very effectively put me off doing something that I didn't want to do in the first place, because his **** smelled awful. I don't know what was wrong with it but it had the most unpleasant smell, even when he'd just showered. If course I could never tell him that was the reason why I didn't want to do it, so I suppose he just thought it was me being a prude.
    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Jibriltz)
    Meh,
    I went down on my last girlfriend, but she didn't like the idea of blowjobs and I didn't mind one bit.

    My point being is, are you just going down on her in the hope that she'll return the favour?
    If she makes you happy, don't let a silly thing such as your girlfriend sticking your trousser saussage in her mouth the main thing in your relationship.
    Blowjobs aren't actually that great (okay, admitedly I'm not an expert), there's a lot of hype about them but: They're not that great and certainly not important.
    Doesn't your relationship have anything in it beyond foreplay?
    definitely havent received a decent one before, some guys rather them to sex!
    to the OP, maybe talk about it, see why? not giving them i guess is fair enough but if sex is totally outta the question as well i'd reconsider your relationship as people cant deny that it isnt an important part!
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    (Original post by 02mik_e)
    No I haven't done a survey. I'm not saying people in my area don't do it, but anytime something like that is mentioned people always react negatively to it.
    hold up hold up?! you live in london... I live in London... I'd say it was very much the norm! :yes:
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    (Original post by sophyy)
    hold up hold up?! you live in london... I live in London... I'd say it was very much the norm! :yes:
    lol very different part of London probably. You wouldn't say someone from Hammersmith thinks the same way as some someone from a council block in Hackey :rolleyes:
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    Life is too short to spend your time silently resenting a sexually selfish partner
    This.

    I don't know how old you are OP, but since you're surfing TSR I'm gonna assume you're still fairly young (18-24). I appreciate that you probably do genuinely love your girlfriend, but sometimes you do have to stand up for yourself and just say enough is enough. I know it's not the 'mature' way of dealing with things, but if I were you I'd refuse to give her the physical contact she wants. Show her that two can play her game, and that if she isn't prepared to sacrifice a little bit for the relationship, neither are you. If that fails, get rid - she's obviously set in her ways and isn't worth the effort for a bit of measly head.

    Just my two.
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    (Original post by 02mik_e)
    lol very different part of London probably. You wouldn't say someone from Hammersmith thinks the same way as some someone from a council block in Hackey :rolleyes:
    wow... could you get more snobby?!
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    (Original post by sophyy)
    wow... could you get more snobby?!
    No I'm not snobby at all as i have a lot of friends including myself who are not from very privileged backgrounds and who have to struggle to get by day in day out. I was only trying to give an example :o:
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    christ, sexual desires are the same no matter where you're from, still biologically and psychologically programmed the same way and where you live shouldnt affect this.
    maybe lower class people do get around more, but in a loving relationship class doesnt matter
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    another update from my situation;

    gf still doesnt wanna take relationship further!

    ive talked and talked, even begged. its not working, i even stopped mentioning anything to do with sex for a few days and tht didnt work either!

    i dont think shes interested in sex 1 bit and gives stupid excuses, wot to do now?
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    Is she a no-sex-before-marriage believer then?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    another update from my situation;

    gf still doesnt wanna take relationship further!

    ive talked and talked, even begged. its not working, i even stopped mentioning anything to do with sex for a few days and tht didnt work either!

    i dont think shes interested in sex 1 bit and gives stupid excuses, wot to do now?
    Sorry to hear about your situation, it must be very frustrating.

    If she doesn't want to take things further, then you either have to accept that and stay with her, or seriously reconsider things.

    I wouldn't blame yourself, as sex is a natural desire and it's perfectly normal for you to want to be intimate with your partner after so long.

    If you don't think that you can be with her in a sexless relationship I think you should tell her that. Be honest with her. If you are incompatible then maybe it's time to end things.

    Did you know she wasn't into sex from the start of your relationship? Or did she not tell you from the start? :confused:
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    I think some of the people here are being a little stupid. You cant simply say that he is selfish for wanting to have sex in an adult relationship. Forcing her is a non-issue as the point is...well she hasnt been forced has she?

    I agree with the majority of the posts in this thread, the not getting a blow-job isnt the point, its the lack of intimacy which is normal in an adult relationship. Im sorry mate, but if I was in your position, I would come to the conclusion that we werent compatible in a sexual way, you want it, she doesnt, and then leave her.
    • #4
    #4

    I'm glad I read through this thread. I am in perhaps a similar situation. My girlfriend and I have been in love for over 2 years, she's my best friend etc etc and I never want to leave her, and she feels exactly the same way. However, the lack of physical intimacy is so frustrating- she never 'wants' me physically, I always have to ask her, and although she tells me she does desire me, it feels like she doesn't. I am always having to plead with her, and she always says no. We have been semi-naked together (which always requires much begging), and kissing her on the breasts is the most intimate we've been. She says she likes this, but I think she just says that to make me happy. Whenever we talk about sex, she says she wants to, but "one day". It's not a marriage thing- we both don't believe in marriage. It is extremely frustrating given that I am madly in love with her and have been with her for over 2 years! Sometimes I think she must be asexual or something! And yet I know she is in love with me. Any advice?
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    Some of you people are ******* nuts. "Dump her"/"Leave her" - no wonder so many marriages and relationships end in tatters. You would seriously leave someone because they didnt suck your genitals? Jesus Christ. Is that what makes a relationship then? Oral sex? I expect nothing less from a forum full of teens.
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    (Original post by Polly1101)
    christ, sexual desires are the same no matter where you're from, still biologically and psychologically programmed the same way and where you live shouldnt affect this.
    Nice idea but profoundly wrong. Culture and upbringing have everything to do with sexual desires.

    If it wasn't so, then we'd have similar sexual practices in every country, which simply isn't the case.
    Not to sound like some sleazebag who goes around Europe bedding women, but from experience, I can confidently claim that sexual practices and preferences vary immensely from country to country.

    Your statement doesn't surprise me as people don't naturally accept the idea of how much their culture and upbringing shapes who they are. We all like to believe that we are free individuals void of any external influence that would prevent us from being who we really are.
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    i guess all you can do is ask her, cause noone on here will know the answer for sure! im guessing either she doesnt like the idea, cleanliness concerns or she doesnt know how to?

    also, if shes willing to receive i'd say thats a little bit selfish! you shouldnt do it to her if shes not gonna give it back...
 
 
 
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