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    Me and my girlfriend are having some problems with our housemate and no longer want to live with her. The problem is that we have all been good friends for 4 years and she might struggle to find somewhere else to live.

    We all met at uni and shared a flat together with 4 other people for 2 years, once we had finished uni we all went our separate ways. Me and my girlfriend decided to get a place of our own at which point our friend was struggling to find somewhere to live. I found a really nice apartment in the city centre which is perfect for us but at that time a little out our price range, so we discussed it between the 3 of us and decided to all live together again. Me and my girlfriend have completely furnished the flat from top-to-bottom knowing that one day we will have a place of our own.

    But now we have been having serious problems with our friend but dont want to ruin our friendship. We want to live together in the apartment and want her to leave but its delicate situation because we know how much she loves the flat. But she treats it as a £50 a week student house and not a home, she does no cleaning, constantly has people stopping over and has parties without mentioning anything to us. And it really annoys us that it is us who had paid for everything in the house and he and her friends have no respect for it.

    We really dont know what to do, so I thought Id see if anyone has had a similar problem and can give advice - thank you!
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    Have a threesome :awesome: That always does the trick!
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    I haven't had a similar problem at all- but wouldn't it be best to talk to her about it first- before deciding something as drastic as this?
    Let her know you're not impressed with her attitude, maybe she just doesn't realise how much its annoying you. To be honest asking her to move out IS going to affect your friendship no matter how gentle you are when asking her to go. I hope you can sort it all out
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    If you can't talk to her one on one could you write everything down and give it to her? It may be she doesn't realise how much she is pushing the boundaries. Could you tell her that she needs to pull her weight than maybe give her 1 month to pull her **** together? That would also give her time to find somewhere else to live if that ended up being the only solution?

    P.S. i sympathise with you completely! am having problems of my own with one housemate in particular who isn't pulling her weight
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    Ha ha I think that would be a step in the wrong direction but I'll consider it!
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    (Original post by R1L3Y1882)
    Me and my girlfriend are having some problems with our housemate and no longer want to live with her. The problem is that we have all been good friends for 4 years and she might struggle to find somewhere else to live.

    We all met at uni and shared a flat together with 4 other people for 2 years, once we had finished uni we all went our separate ways. Me and my girlfriend decided to get a place of our own at which point our friend was struggling to find somewhere to live. I found a really nice apartment in the city centre which is perfect for us but at that time a little out our price range, so we discussed it between the 3 of us and decided to all live together again. Me and my girlfriend have completely furnished the flat from top-to-bottom knowing that one day we will have a place of our own.

    But now we have been having serious problems with our friend but dont want to ruin our friendship. We want to live together in the apartment and want her to leave but its delicate situation because we know how much she loves the flat. But she treats it as a £50 a week student house and not a home, she does no cleaning, constantly has people stopping over and has parties without mentioning anything to us. And it really annoys us that it is us who had paid for everything in the house and he and her friends have no respect for it.

    We really dont know what to do, so I thought Id see if anyone has had a similar problem and can give advice - thank you!
    Tell her you and your girlfriend want babies and you want her out so you can have extra space :awesome:

    Or just tell her straight that it's your home and you want to make it just you and your girlfriend's.
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    There are two options really.
    Either you and your girlfriend move out on your own, or you ask your housemate to move out.
    You don't have to be too harsh, just tell her that your relationship is getting more serious and you want to live alone, rather than just telling her to get out.
    Yes, she will probably be upset, but she will get over it and your friendship will probably end up breaking down if you keep living together and resenting her anyway.
    Offer to help her find somewhere else, help her move etc, so she doesn't feel too rejected.
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    Id love to talk to her about it but she is very sensitive about things and sometimes blows the smallest things out of proportion. A few years ago she asked if I would set the washing machine for her to which I replied "you're a big girl now, I'm sure you'll manage". From that she said I was calling her fat and started crying!

    Her other friends are ********* too - knowing them they'd stop over as much as they could just to really annoy us.
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    Thanks for the replies everyone - there's some good ideas there (not so much the threesome or the babies ones) - but thanks!
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    It seems to be a case of two's company, three's a crowd....I would talk to her, explain that you are not happy about her behaviour and if it continues she will have to consider finding a place of her own...also, remind her that you and your girlfriend have put alot of work/ money into furnishing the place and dont like to see it trashed :yep:

    Or you could just up her ren,t and tell her shes gonna have to pay for all these friends staying over too :tongue:
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    Both of you should speak to her on her own, and tell her that you think it's wrong that she's treating your house as a stop-off for all of her friends, and you treat it as a home whereas she treats it as a flat?
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    Yeah - its very annoying how she constantly has people stopping over without even mentioning that people were coming. I honestly went into my living room in my boxers one morning to find 5 people asleep on the floor! Im worried because we have alot of dvds an Xbox and a Wii in the living room and with all these people stopping - they could easily get nicked.
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    [QUOTE=bikipip]Aw I totally know what you are going through. Had a similar problem, furnishing a house and then housemates/friends treating it like it was any old student accommodation. I bought a really expensive cowhide rug and someone left a hot pizza box on it, leaving massive oil marks and basically ruining it.

    What I did was simply talked to them and they completely understood and moved on. I said something like: 'If I knew we were going to have so many crazy parties I wouldn't have spent so much on furniture. don't want to seem stingy, but I do feel like some people you bring here don't understand the money I have spent on this place.'QUOTE]

    Thats a really good way of explaining it to her - She see's the furniture as hers or as if it came with the flat. We bought a 6ft book shelf from IKEA and as soon as I built it, she had filled half with her books!
 
 
 
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