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sex drive/affection linked to self esteem? Watch

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    I have noticed that the majoirty of people with high sex drives and wanting lots of affection are quite insecure people with low self esteem.

    I had a boyfriend who always felt unloved and was constantly wanting lots of affection and attention. Another boyfriend was very confident secure and wasn't really that sex orientated.

    Anyone else noticed this or is it just me? :o:
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    Yeah sort of. Not so sure about the sex drive part. It's more feeling secure, kissing and just being close than actual sex, well, what I've seen :yes:
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    I reckon this has some truth in it.
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    I've noticed that when my confidence/self-esteem is lower my sex drive decreases considerably and it can take a long time for me to come when I masturbate.

    The more confident I feel the more I want to flirt, be affectionate and intimate however.
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    No. When I'm feeling like I look terrible, the last thing I want is to flirt with/be intimate with someone. I shut myself off emotionally and conversationally if I'm feeling insecure. It's only when I feel like I'm attractive that I want to interact with the opposite sex; I'm a tad narcissistic in many ways, and I prefer to feel like "Yeaaaaah, you're lucky" rather than "I need you to reassure me"
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    I agree with this
    People think they will have a risen self asteem if they sleep with more people, especially with unattractive people i'm sorry to say. e.g. ex bf
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    So far as sex drive goes I think its the opposite, and there is scientific evidence to back me up. Testosterone causes sexual desire in both males and females and it also causes greater confidence and risk taking.

    Girls who have sex not because they want to but in order to please guys might be seeking love and attention and have low insecurity, but that has nothing to do with their sex drive.
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    I have pretty low self esteem, and am very affectionate and have a sky high sex drive so in my case it's true!
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    (Original post by Sakura-Chan)
    Yeah sort of. Not so sure about the sex drive part. It's more feeling secure, kissing and just being close than actual sex, well, what I've seen :yes:
    I'm growing more secure and have wondered about my sx drive, it's much lower.
    We release a hormone when we have sex basically for bonding, (women release 5 times as much of it on average), the need for another is no doubt linked in to self esteem.
    I can't of miss being insecure, I mean, there was always some form of quick affection fix for most of my problems, now I have to put this effort into looking at them and fixing them myself rather than putting them off:rolleyes: .
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    (Original post by xpretty_in_pinkx)
    I agree with this
    People think they will have a risen self asteem if they sleep with more people, especially with unattractive people i'm sorry to say. e.g. ex bf
    Ouch. I'm sorry.
    =[
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    (Original post by beatletaxman)
    Ouch. I'm sorry.
    =[
    are you the ex...
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    I think it makes some difference, but then there are so many factors which could have exactly the same effect. I agree with you, though, OP - it's being wanted.
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    (Original post by pendragon)
    So far as sex drive goes I think its the opposite, and there is scientific evidence to back me up. Testosterone causes sexual desire in both males and females and it also causes greater confidence and risk taking.

    Girls who have sex not because they want to but in order to please guys might be seeking love and attention and have low insecurity, but that has nothing to do with their sex drive.
    Why is that bad? just wondering..
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    (Original post by there's too much love)
    are you the ex...
    Even if I were to humour you, it would still be worse to be her.
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    I have a very high sex drive but other than in the bedroom, I'm not into the whole affection, mostly in public.

    I don't think I suffer from low self esteem not through personality, maybe a tad with appearance.
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    (Original post by blondyx)
    I have noticed that the majoirty of people with high sex drives and wanting lots of affection are quite insecure people with low self esteem.

    I had a boyfriend who always felt unloved and was constantly wanting lots of affection and attention. Another boyfriend was very confident secure and wasn't really that sex orientated.

    Anyone else noticed this or is it just me? :o:
    I was actually expecting this thread to be suggesting the opposite correlation.

    I think it may well be true that individuals with low self esteem often use sex to try and boost that. Particularly girls.

    On the other hand if an individual is at a low ebb in their particular confidence levels I'd imagine they'd have less sex on their mind. Certainly the last thing I want when I'm feeling crap is to have to try getting into someone's pants.
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    (Original post by beatletaxman)
    Even if I were to humour you, it would still be worse to be her.
    wait was she saying her ex thought she was ugly or that she thought her ex was ugly, it looks ambiguous to me...
    ...and I was asking because I assumed it was her talking about her ex, not for any jokey reasons though (although I may make jokes later).
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    I've always thought that more confident people have higher sex drives. A lot of girls with low self-esteem will sleep around, but that isn't anything to do with sex drive.
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    (Original post by MancStudent098)
    I was actually expecting this thread to be suggesting the opposite correlation.

    I think it may well be true that individuals with low self esteem often use sex to try and boost that. Particularly girls.

    On the other hand if an individual is at a low ebb in their particular confidence levels I'd imagine they'd have less sex on their mind. Certainly the last thing I want when I'm feeling crap is to have to try getting into someone's pants.
    True.
    I reckon it dependon what they are insecure about. if they are insecure about looks, they will have less sex. If they are insecure that a partner will leave them, you want alot of sex and affection. IMO anyway :o:
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    (Original post by x y z)
    I've always thought that more confident people have higher sex drives. A lot of girls with low self-esteem will sleep around, but that isn't anything to do with sex drive.

    Interesting, obviously it seems different for everyone, for me I use it as form of stress relief, I think many men are similar. On the odd occasion I've been highly depressed before a w**k and ended up aborting one half way through for a small cry (to be fair to me, this was just after being dumped from an 18 month relationship).

    But does that mean my sex drive was high, or that I just started trying to **** to cope with things?
    Had my sex drive been high would I not gone looking for sex instead of staying in...

    ...I think it depends if people are used to being in a relationship as well or not, because when you are and you're sad, at least when I am, I like a lot of affection, be it sexual or non-sexual.

    I wonder what that exactly means though.
 
 
 
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