I hate posting things like this, but I dont generally speak to freinds and family about problems so don't really have anyone to go to.
I basically stopped seeing my dad about 10 years ago now, thanks to my mum (a long story that I won't go into) I wanted to get in touch for a while but assumed it was better that I didnt. Not too long ago I had some very strange thoughts about him and wanted to get in touch before it was too late, and a strange dream with someone telling me he was sick and walking away laughing. Probably just coincidence, but a few weeks ago had a call from my uncle on my dad's side who again I havent seen for 11 years.
he told me that my dad was in hospital with throat cancer, and was having his voicebox removed
I got the balls to call him back as I didnt want to leave it, I'm not one to hold a grudge and don't really care about what happened in the past. My uncle said he's give me a call back and give me updates, he was due to have the op but it got postponed as he had a virus. My uncle said hed give my number to dad for him to call me but obviously I wasnt sure it would be any time soon due to the throat cancer. but now a good month or so has gone on and I havent heard from him or my uncle and am not sure what to do.. my mum forced me tell him that I didnt want to see him when I was very young, and out of wanting to spare her feelings and with her standing by the phone did so, so I dont know if he simply doesnt want to know, if the worst has happened or what, and am not sure what to do. Don't want to bombard him with calls and have left a voicemail to no avail,
not sure what to do anymore, the two people I trusted enough to talk to about it, wanted to change the subject completely, and avoid talking about it. I'm really fed up, I hate bombarding people but it was a kick in the teeth because I do everything I can when a freind of mine is upset, and when the shoes on the other foot they really don't bother.
parent with cancer.. Watch
- Thread Starter
- 16-07-2009 21:23
- 16-07-2009 22:18
I would try and phone your uncle again. I am just guessing but maybe after the op your dad was a bit worse for wear and wants to get back on track so that when you do see him he's recovered from the op. You could write your Dad a letter and just tell him how you feel??? Letters are old fashioned but it might help you as it gives you a chance to get everything you feel down and I think it will help your Dad, so if you have his address you could write a letter?? I really hope you sort everythin out xxxxxxx
- 16-07-2009 22:30
Try, try and try again.
I ditto above I really think it might help him.
Good luck xxx