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    Hey, I'm 20 years old, an only child and feel like my life is like a prison. Like any normal 20 year old I like going out, and mostly at night not only clubbing but going cinema late, going for late night drives and hanging out with my friends, unreasonable?

    My parents unfortunately see it as unreasonable, they think I should only go out during the day, and that only non-Asians (indians) go out at night, which isn't true.

    They like to give me the speech of how they didn't go out at night when they were my age, how they were good and blah, blah, blah...
    I've tried to explain to them that their generation and my generation are totally different and that we live in a western society, but that still doesn't help.

    All my cousins who were my age have, went out at night and did what they want, even my uncles and aunts see them as unreasonable and I sometimes feel to ask them to speak to my parents.

    All my Asian friends go out and have fun and I feel trapped like in a prison, I don't go out every night but once in a while, but they say "when you coming home" or "all you like doing is going out" etc and it puts me off any ideas on what I could please?
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    Are you a South Asian?
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    Lol i dunno, your 20, move out.
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    (Original post by tiana)
    Hey, I'm 20 years old, an only child and feel like my life is like a prison. Like any normal 20 year old I like going out, and mostly at night not only clubbing but going cinema late, going for late night drives and hanging out with my friends, unreasonable?

    My parents unfortunately see it as unreasonable, they think I should only go out during the day, and that only non-Asians (indians) go out at night, which isn't true.

    They like to give me the speech of how they didn't go out at night when they were my age, how they were good and blah, blah, blah...
    I've tried to explain to them that their generation and my generation are totally different and that we live in a western society, but that still doesn't help.

    All my cousins who were my age have, went out at night and did what they want, even my uncles and aunts see them as unreasonable and I sometimes feel to ask them to speak to my parents.

    All my Asian friends go out and have fun and I feel trapped like in a prison, I don't go out every night but once in a while, but they say "when you coming home" or "all you like doing is going out" etc and it puts me off any ideas on what I could please?
    What are you doing with yourself at the moment? Like working or studying?
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    Sit down and have a chat with them? Tell them that you feel trapped, restricted etc. Bargain with them. Compromise? Try that.

    If they still won't budge, then honestly, consider a) doing what you want anyway as you are an adult or b) move out asap.

    Your situation sounds horrible, you don't deserve to be treated like that. Good luck :console:
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    Move out! It sounds crap. When I was about 17/18, my mum often moaned about how often I went out, but was just doing it because she felt she had to - she'd never have actually stopped me. At 20, that's just weird. You've been an adult for quite some time and your parents shouldn't have any influence over what you do at all!

    If it's as bad as it sounds, move out!
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    (Original post by neodymium)
    Are you a South Asian?

    Yes I am south Asian
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    (Original post by kexy)
    What are you doing with yourself at the moment? Like working or studying?
    I work part-time and study full-time, just on summer hols atm
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    (Original post by randomgirl)
    Sit down and have a chat with them? Tell them that you feel trapped, restricted etc. Bargain with them. Compromise? Try that.

    If they still won't budge, then honestly, consider a) doing what you want anyway as you are an adult or b) move out asap.

    Your situation sounds horrible, you don't deserve to be treated like that. Good luck :console:

    I'm going to try and compromise with them, but they way they talk, just makes me feel like crap, and end up crying and not going in the end! but thnx for the advice =]
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    (Original post by tiana)
    Yes I am south Asian
    That basically explains it. South Asian parents are annoyingly controlling, especially with girls. This might seem rude but you've to disobey your parents once a while and go against them to win some freedom.
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    Sucks to be you man.
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    I'd expect a 20 year-old to be independent and live on their own. That's the whole charm of being an adult. But I'll tell you, I understand every bit of what you're saying. I think you should ENJOY being able to go out during the day.

    Because I can't even do that during the day. So being able to go out during the day is definitely and far better than not being able to go out. At all. At any time. I'd be happy if I were you from the viewpoint that you can do whatever you want to during the day.

    However, you might try to talk to your parents more about it and explain how you feel. I mean, technically, they're stopping you from meeting new people and having fun. What I suggest you should focus on more is how you're going to get your own place and move somewhere else. That's pretty important.

    But yeah, as I said, do be thankful for what you have and what you can do - others have it worse.
 
 
 
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