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HELP!!!!1 Jap eye caught in zip! Watch

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    Local doctors is closed and im too embaressed to phone an ambulance. Anyone with any knowledge of how i may treat this without anyone knowing please help me. Blood is appearing from my tip now and i am severely worried. What if i cannot have children, my family is catholic FFS!
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    Encouraging first post.
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    Stop with the **** im in need of serious medical attention
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    Grab like 5 bandaids and keep them ready, unzip your pants, apply bandaids.

    O.o; :troll2:

    If you're actually in need of serious medical attention call ambulance! They won't laugh in your face ffs they've probably seen all kinds of things WAY worse! And if they started laughing at patients they wouldn't go very far in their careers...
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    get high
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    :rofl: Wtf :lolwut:
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    Wait... your penis is japanese!? XD
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    I find the majority of these posts unhelpful in my dire situation.
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    sucking a small wound can help it to heal sometimes.

    Can you bend down and suck your little friend?

    If not, ambulance.

    If not, don't have kids.
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    Too embarrassed to save your lad?

    Then you don’t deserve to have it.
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    (Original post by Dr Gonzo)
    I find the majority of these posts unhelpful in my dire situation.
    Well what do you want? We're a student forum not a MY **** HURTS OMG forum :mad2:
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    I hate you all so much. IT WONT STOP BLEEDING!
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    lol.
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    (Original post by Dr Gonzo)
    I hate you all so much. IT WONT STOP BLEEDING!
    anyone else remembering that inbetweeners episodes, "I wasn't ******* I wasn't *******" hahahaha.
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    (Original post by Dr Gonzo)
    I hate you all so much. IT WONT STOP BLEEDING!
    Stop posting and go to ******* A&E.

    Jesus H Christ on a unicycle... :rolleyes:
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    Phone NHS Direct. They can tell you if it's essential to go to A&E or not.

    This is assuming you're not a troll, in which case I suggest you **** off and die.

    0845 4647
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    Can't you put a bandage around it or something?
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    There is a little piece that holds it together get a friend with some needle nose pliers (preferably a hot chick friend to drive home the embarrassment) and have them remove it
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    (Original post by Dr Gonzo)
    I hate you all so much. IT WONT STOP BLEEDING!
    :rofl:

    remind me to rep you for this whether you meant it to be or not it was epic!
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    Stick one of them cotton bud things up it to stop the bleeding.
 
 
 
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