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how to turn someone down nicely?

what is the best way to turn somebody down? i've been speaking to my coursemate a lot online recently and lately the conversation has got deeper and he keeps inviting me for drinks and to meet up. Normally i'd be thrilled and say yes as i'm free and single , but as much as i love his personality, i'm just not attracted to him, he's been hurt before in the past and i don't want to lead him on and hurt him even more, i just want him as a friend, what can i do?

OP

anyone?

Oh i dont think there is ever a nice way if he really likes you,
will be hurt anyway you do it. Good luck :smile:

Reply 3

bigbhoy91

Tell him as it is. Friends or nada. Not hard really.

Reply 4

Psyche05

11

God I've had this problem, one of the boys in my year asked me out >5 times and it became more and more difficult to be nice about turning him down.

Reply 5

sil3nt_cha0s

16

twizzle

anyone?

can I ask what is it that's so bad about him? he sounds like a really nice guy, not like those people who act as if they're God's gift for women...

Reply 6

Titch89

14

Get straight to the point, but don't be rude about it.

Reply 7

twizzle

OP

7

sil3nt_cha0s

can I ask what is it that's so bad about him? he sounds like a really nice guy, not like those people who act as if they're God's gift for women...

they're's absolutely nothing wrong with him, it's just i've known him for 2 years now and i just view him as a friend, there's just nothing there if you get me?

Reply 8

Rafawozzy

Tell him you just got out of a long term relationship.

Reply 9

sil3nt_cha0s

16

twizzle

they're's absolutely nothing wrong with him, it's just i've known him for 2 years now and i just view him as a friend, there's just nothing there if you get me?

oh right...well, er, I really don't know how you could put it without hurting his feelings. perhaps get his/your mates to tease him so much that he's put off by you? persuade another girl to be with him?

also just visited your profile...thought I recognised that face :p:

Reply 10

cxjcjj

i had this problem before. i think better just turn him down straightly,if u do it too polite or nice,some boys will just not give up...

Reply 11

Joel4fun4u

14

twizzle

what is the best way to turn somebody down? i've been speaking to my coursemate a lot online recently and lately the conversation has got deeper and he keeps inviting me for drinks and to meet up. Normally i'd be thrilled and say yes as i'm free and single , but as much as i love his personality, i'm just not attracted to him, he's been hurt before in the past and i don't want to lead him on and hurt him even more, i just want him as a friend, what can i do?

Ignore them. They seem to get the idea eventually.

Reply 12

twizzle

OP

7

sil3nt_cha0s

also just visited your profile...thought I recognised that face :p:

I post far too much on TSR then :biggrin:

hahaa

Reply 13

HRHxo

1

Urgh i've been in this situation, just be as honest as possible but keep it polite.
Nevertheless, i've had experience where a guy didnt get the message for month(s) as much as a tried, until he saw me with someone else then backed off.
:smile:

Reply 14

thebutterflyeffect

the word sorry and then any excuse you have.

Reply 15

Blatant Troll

15

If you're not straight up with him, he'll keep thinking he has a chance

Reply 16

ANM775

20

play him at his own game. he's been sneaky and subtle about it so it would be hard to call him on it. you be subtle about it too!

start talking to him about boys you fancy. make it up if neccessary.

if you pass by a good looking guy say "oooh he's nice" or something like that.

start saying how he's a really good friend, like the brother you never had.

Reply 17

Rushé

Maybe you should give him a chance. There's nothing saying you have to rush into an intimate relationship with him! Just take your time, you may grow to love him - the potential's there if you see him as a friend.

Reply 18

DAFOne

1

Lying is not all that bad in a situation like this. Alternately you can go out for drinks as long as you make it very, very clear that it is as "friends only".

Reply 19

Tootles

21

twizzle

what is the best way to turn somebody down? i've been speaking to my coursemate a lot online recently and lately the conversation has got deeper and he keeps inviting me for drinks and to meet up. Normally i'd be thrilled and say yes as i'm free and single , but as much as i love his personality, i'm just not attracted to him, he's been hurt before in the past and i don't want to lead him on and hurt him even more, i just want him as a friend, what can i do?

If he asks, just tell him that you're not interested. That's what - and - did to me. Oh, and - ...

Spoiler

Just be kind; don't make it seem like you're letting him down, but don't make it seem like you're disguising what you're saying.

how to turn someone down nicely?

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