how to turn someone down nicely?

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ANM775

play him at his own game. he's been sneaky and subtle about it so it would be hard to call him on it. you be subtle about it too!

start talking to him about boys you fancy. make it up if neccessary.

if you pass by a good looking guy say "oooh he's nice" or something like that.

start saying how he's a really good friend, like the brother you never had.

That does not always work. I remember a girl that would cling all over me whenever we were together and I tried this very technique - useless! I think she knew what I was up to.

Reply 21

DrDé

Tell him your a tranny.

Reply 22

twizzle

lol, he's knows i'm single and have been for a while now, but he's also quite close to the people i hang around with at uni, so he knows a lot about me. i think i'll be subtle at first and mention other guys, then after that i'll tell him i just see him as a friend and if we were to meet up it would only be on a friendly basis. Thanks for the advice guys.

Reply 23

woopwoop:)

I have had this probelm before. This guy just wouldn't give up no matter how much i turned him down so i ended up having to lie and say i was seeing someone. He kept asking me loads of questions about him and i had to make up a name and a college etc. I felt so stupid lying but i didn't want to hurt his feelings.
Even now months after, he keeps asking me about how things are going and saying things like "just checking to see if your single so we can go on a date"
some guys just don't get the message :s-smilie:

Reply 24

Xeren

There is no nice way. Its a lot better to be clear how you feel than be nice and basically give false hope. I was kinda in the same situation as you. In the end it got too stressful and I cut off all contact with him. Its sounds harsh but I just kept thinking if it was the other way round. I wouldn't want to waste time on someone who didn't fancy me. One of my friends at the mo is spending loads of time with a guy she's not interested in and he's smitten. It's actually painful to watch.

Reply 25

shutupcaf

I've just had to do exactly the same thing to one of my male friends who I've been told is 'obssessed' with me and so it's hard to be really nice if someone is annoying the hell out of you! But I just said to him 'I'm sorry if I've given you the wrong idea but I don't fancy you and I hope this won't affect our friendship too much'. I guess to be nicer I could've said 'I just think of you as a friend and nothing more' but if you are too nice, in my experience, it just gives lads false hope and they think that they still have a chance. So the trick is not to be horrible, instead be firm and show that you are still interested in just being friends or if you aren't, you could just ignore them. However I've even found that ignoring a lad just makes them fancy you more...Good luck however you do it anyway! It's better to tell him now rather than later when he has stronger feelings for you.

Reply 26

chic

twizzle

they're's absolutely nothing wrong with him, it's just i've known him for 2 years now and i just view him as a friend, there's just nothing there if you get me?

Tell him that. It's straightforward enough for him to get the idea but it's not mean or hurtful.

Reply 27

Troubled_Student

Just say you'd rather be friends.

Reply 28

dreadnaut

If he's such a friend are you sure he doesn't want to just catch up and chill out over a few cold ones?

I know "going for drinks" usually has more to it; but surely after 2 years he'd have made his move by now?

Id go along, if he tries anything just tell him you'd much rather have him as a friend