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    It seems that i am stupid and have no self respect. An ex treated me like crap and so i decided not to talk to him anymore and sent him a long message explaining why. He didn't even reply. 2 weeks later (now) i message him a friendly message and now we are on talking terms... i was a complete idiot, now hes gonna think im totally stupid for telling him i dont want to talk to him anymore by giving valid reasons then messaging him being nice. I feel so pathetic, hes probably thinking he has all the control now and i can't be without him and got me wrapped around his finger. I talked to him for a while today about casual stuff but have realised now that i should have just left it. I feel like such an idiot.

    Not just now but in general. I do what other's want me to rather than myself, i end up doing things which make others happy and me unhappy.

    How do i get some self respect back? :-s

    ps. please keep anoymous or delete.
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    be more independent and rely less on others.
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    try and not talk to him again, otherwise you'll feel worse about yourself.
    And do more things that you want to for once.
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    Self respect? Try doing some charity work, like joining the Samaritans. The sense of good will make you feel so much better about yourself, and listening to people's problems will put your own into perspective. Good luck.
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    Ask Aretha Franklin.
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    by knowing that you don't need anybody to give you validation, that you're perfect the way you are. Meeting new people helps and getting a large circle of friends helps so that you're not reliant on one person. as for the ex situation, it doesn't help talking to them, cut contact best thing.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It seems that i am stupid and have no self respect. An ex treated me like crap and so i decided not to talk to him anymore and sent him a long message explaining why. He didn't even reply. 2 weeks later (now) i message him a friendly message and now we are on talking terms... i was a complete idiot, now hes gonna think im totally stupid for telling him i dont want to talk to him anymore by giving valid reasons then messaging him being nice. I feel so pathetic, hes probably thinking he has all the control now and i can't be without him and got me wrapped around his finger. I talked to him for a while today about casual stuff but have realised now that i should have just left it. I feel like such an idiot.

    Not just now but in general. I do what other's want me to rather than myself, i end up doing things which make others happy and me unhappy.

    How do i get some self respect back? :-s

    ps. please keep anoymous or delete.
    You sound a lot like a friend of mine.
    Anyway, I don't think it was wrong of you to break up with him if he was treating you like crap. You deserve better than that and had a right to say what you did. But why did you message him afterwards? That's what I don't understand. Try to please yourself rather than other people.
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    (Original post by Eva2)
    You sound a lot like a friend of mine.
    Anyway, I don't think it was wrong of you to break up with him if he was treating you like crap. You deserve better than that and had a right to say what you did. But why did you message him afterwards? That's what I don't understand. Try to please yourself rather than other people.
    Because i missed him i guess, i was just being pathetic. I wanted to hear from him and thought if i was friendly to him and we started to get along, then he would reply to everything i told him in that long message he didn't reply to. I felt like i was getting over him aswell.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It seems that i am stupid and have no self respect. An ex treated me like crap and so i decided not to talk to him anymore and sent him a long message explaining why. He didn't even reply. 2 weeks later (now) i message him a friendly message and now we are on talking terms... i was a complete idiot, now hes gonna think im totally stupid for telling him i dont want to talk to him anymore by giving valid reasons then messaging him being nice. I feel so pathetic, hes probably thinking he has all the control now and i can't be without him and got me wrapped around his finger. I talked to him for a while today about casual stuff but have realised now that i should have just left it. I feel like such an idiot.

    Not just now but in general. I do what other's want me to rather than myself, i end up doing things which make others happy and me unhappy.

    How do i get some self respect back? :-s

    ps. please keep anoymous or delete.
    Its like that drugs campaign 'just say no'. Do what you want and enjoy your own company. The first couple of times you'll feel guilty that you let others down, but then you won't resent others for doing things you don't want to do and feel better about doing things you want to do.

    One of the most magical nights I had was by myself, cos I did what I wanted.
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    (Original post by Xeren)
    Its like that drugs campaign 'just say no'. Do what you want and enjoy your own company. The first couple of times you'll feel guilty that you let others down, but then you won't resent others for doing things you don't want to do and feel better about doing things you want to do.

    One of the most magical nights I had was by myself, cos I did what I wanted.
    ok. what do i do about the ex?
    god knows what i was thinking. now he has the control, and i appear desperate. I didnt even get a reply to the original message i sent him. he said he was gonna reply when he had the time to word it properly but now i doubt he will bother as we somehow are on speaking terms after i told him 2 weeks before i dont want to speak to him again :-s
    Im not deliberatly trying to confuse him
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    ok. what do i do about the ex?
    god knows what i was thinking. now he has the control, and i appear desperate. I didnt even get a reply to the original message i sent him. he said he was gonna reply when he had the time to word it properly but now i doubt he will bother as we somehow are on speaking terms after i told him 2 weeks before i dont want to speak to him again :-s
    Im not deliberatly trying to confuse him
    He's your ex, so he's not your problem. Just don't speak to him. He wasn't nice to you, you're not in a relationship with him, you're not friends, you don't owe him anything. If he texts you, don't text back. If he calls, don't answer. He's a big boy, you don't need to loose sleep over whether he's confused or not.
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    You need to become more independant , and rely more on yourself than others.
 
 
 
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