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I have realised why people cheat, and why monagamy is not a good idea watch

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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    :rolleyes: Did you just learn the word, 'paradox' or something?

    There's actually no point whatsoever in me bothering with you, you don't get what I'm saying in the OP or in my previous post. I've been in this thing for several years now and have had relationships of all kinds, with many different women, and I treat them with nothing but respect. Stop acting like you know the first thing about me. In case you care, I'm talking about multiple, parallel relationships, as opposed to the crude, "love 'em and leave 'em" type of thing you seem to be suggesting. I do 'keep' my women, for as long as we enhance each other's lives....I just don't restrict myself to one at a time.

    My thinking and understanding of male/female dynamics and indeed, what 'happiness' really is, is waaaaay beyond your understanding, as you've shown through your complete lack of comprehension in anything I've talked about. Tbh mate, you sound like the majority of ppl, clueless and frustrated....you just happen to have read a few pick-up books.

    Don't bother responding to this, cos I promise you I won't read it. I wasted 5 minutes of my life typing this, and I'm not prepared to waste any more on such a simple and small-minded individual.
    You hardly respect women if you can't be faithful and just have one a time..
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    I cant get over how narrow minded some people on this site are. You dont have to agree to take on board other people opinions and discuss/explore them appropriately.

    Just because Pologomy isnt for you is doesnt make it wrong, same as being gay isnt wong just because your straight.
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    Well I think it's human nature to want to find love and security, which goes against what you're saying. Plus, if it's natural, why do we fall in love? And why do we get hurt when someone cheats on us?
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    I thought it was a brilliant story.
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    The scorpion shrugged, "I could not help myself. It is my nature."
    But if it were a part of human nature to cheat, then we'd all be doing it.
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    (Original post by blondyx)
    You hardly respect women if you can't be faithful and just have one a time..
    See what I mean? Classic 'traditional' thinking...but also wrong.

    Who says you can't respect someone you're sleeping with, but sleep with other people? I respect everyone's morals, so clearly I wouldn't go out with you, because you would find it disrespectful for me to sleep with someone else, but for a more free, open minded girl, who has a more realistic worldview, and doesn't mind not being my only partner - its not disrespectful.

    I would argue that I respect women MORE than your traditional dating guy - because it is within their nature to want variety, so in essence, they are being dishonest to themselves and their (one) partner by remaining monogamous.

    Here's one last example to show you how women, in the real world perceive me; most guys encounter what the PUA community calls, "Last minute reistance", which is bacically the things a girl will do to stop herself having sex with a guy, "I don't know you that well" etc....and techniques to get around this are taught. I never get this, and I mean never...you know what the only thing a girl usually says to me is before we sleep together? "Why me? Out of all those girls?"

    You see, I'm not a player, or a manwhore or anything like that - I just have an attractive lifestyle and personality, and its something that women want to be a part of - and I only choose women who are sexually fliberated, i.e not people like yourself.

    (Original post by 99 Red Balloons)
    Well I think it's human nature to want to find love and security, which goes against what you're saying. Plus, if it's natural, why do we fall in love? And why do we get hurt when someone cheats on us?
    Thats are intellectual mind coming into play. We fall 'in love' because, whether we realise it or not, we weren't truly happy or self-actualised in the first place....and then this wonderful other person come along and appears to do that for you. And obviously when they cheat, the reverse applies. The fact they people cheat when 'in love' really proves my point.

    Self conciousness and intellect have been around for a tiny fraction of the time that are basic biological instincts have. Thats why, in the end, they win out. I mean, I know you're only 16 so still in dreamland....but when you're 35 and the whole fairytale thing hasn't happened (it won't, trust me) you'll probably get where I'm coming from a bit more.
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    I thought it was genetic.
    There is a link between primate testes size and female fidelity.
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    See what I mean? Classic 'traditional' thinking...but also wrong.

    Who says you can't respect someone you're sleeping with, but sleep with other people? I respect everyone's morals, so clearly I wouldn't go out with you, because you would find it disrespectful for me to sleep with someone else, but for a more free, open minded girl, who has a more realistic worldview, and doesn't mind not being my only partner - its not disrespectful.

    I would argue that I respect women MORE than your traditional dating guy - because it is within their nature to want variety, so in essence, they are being dishonest to themselves and their (one) partner by remaining monogamous.

    Here's one last example to show you how women, in the real world perceive me; most guys encounter what the PUA community calls, "Last minute reistance", which is bacically the things a girl will do to stop herself having sex with a guy, "I don't know you that well" etc....and techniques to get around this are taught. I never get this, and I mean never...you know what the only thing a girl usually says to me is before we sleep together? "Why me? Out of all those girls?"

    You see, I'm not a player, or a manwhore or anything like that - I just have an attractive lifestyle and personality, and its something that women want to be a part of - and I only choose women who are sexually fliberated, i.e not people like yourself.
    How do you fit through doors with a head that size :awesome:
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    I ALWAYS knew I was right. I seriously sometimes think of myself as a visionary or something, in terms of male/female interactions. I predict that in the future that the ridiculous and soul-destroying concept of a monogamous (spelling?) relationship will be exposed for what it is - peoples' fear of being alone and insecurity.

    All you that have cheated or been cheated on, don't feel bad or guilty. Read this story:

    One day, a scorpion set out on a journey until he reached a river.

    He couldn't see any way across.

    Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.

    "Hellooo Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"

    "Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.

    "Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"



    So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown.

    Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.

    "You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"

    The scorpion shrugged, "I could not help myself. It is my nature."
    ERM...What is the point you are trying to make...?

    Are you seriously trying to say that monogamy is NOT in our nature!?
    and can you try and spell MONAGAMY properly next time?
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    I ALWAYS knew I was right. I seriously sometimes think of myself as a visionary or something, in terms of male/female interactions. I predict that in the future that the ridiculous and soul-destroying concept of a monogamous (spelling?) relationship will be exposed for what it is - peoples' fear of being alone and insecurity.

    All you that have cheated or been cheated on, don't feel bad or guilty. Read this story:

    One day, a scorpion set out on a journey until he reached a river.

    He couldn't see any way across.

    Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.

    "Hellooo Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"

    "Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.

    "Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"



    So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown.

    Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.

    "You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"

    The scorpion shrugged, "I could not help myself. It is my nature."
    I do sort of see what you're saying OP. But I don't think that something being in your 'nature' necessarily makes it the right thing to do. You know, one could argue that it's only human nature to fight and lash out when something doesn't go your way, but if everyone did that then the world would be an even less pretty place than it already is. Sometimes, not acting on instinct is the best thing to do.
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    (Original post by Magnanimity)
    How do you fit through doors with a head that size :awesome:
    Well I'm just being honest. And believe me, I certainly wasn't this way during adolescence - I had to earn it the hard way, and I deserve the life I lead now, and women recognise that, and they don't begrudge me sleeping with others.

    I don't know what it is exactly, but I always had a certain stubbornness inside me, and I guess it translated into a refusal to settle for an 'average' or 'ordinary' sex life, and to go after the lifestyle I really wanted to lead. That led to a whole entire change of perspective, which I know is right. I can walk into a club and see which guy is going to get laid and which isn't by watching about 10 seconds of interaction, I can know in under 30 seconds roughly how many people a person has slept with after meeting them, and lots of other things like this.

    I seriously doubt there's 50 other people my age in the country who understand male/female dynamics to the same extent that I do, I have a 45 year old ex-model partner who has ****** over 100 men and travelled the world many times over, who is one of the only people I have met that is on a par with me, in terms of the understanding I have - so, although what I say is controversial and alien to you, you really should take heed - because you will see it for yourself one day.

    (Original post by _Fleur_)
    I do sort of see what you're saying OP. But I don't think that something being in your 'nature' necessarily makes it the right thing to do. You know, one could argue that it's only human nature to fight and lash out when something doesn't go your way, but if everyone did that then the world would be an even less pretty place than it already is. Sometimes, not acting on instinct is the best thing to do.
    We should always act on our instincts when it doesn't breach anyone else's human rights or harm them in any way. ('Emotional harm' i.e insecurity not withstanding)
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    See what I mean? Classic 'traditional' thinking...but also wrong.
    Who says you can't respect someone you're sleeping with, but sleep with other people? I respect everyone's morals, so clearly I wouldn't go out with you, because you would find it disrespectful for me to sleep with someone else, but for a more free, open minded girl, who has a more realistic worldview, and doesn't mind not being my only partner - its not disrespectful.

    I would argue that I respect women MORE than your traditional dating guy - because it is within their nature to want variety, so in essence, they are being dishonest to themselves and their (one) partner by remaining monogamous.

    Here's one last example to show you how women, in the real world perceive me; most guys encounter what the PUA community calls, "Last minute reistance", which is bacically the things a girl will do to stop herself having sex with a guy, "I don't know you that well" etc....and techniques to get around this are taught. I never get this, and I mean never...you know what the only thing a girl usually says to me is before we sleep together? "Why me? Out of all those girls?"

    You see, I'm not a player, or a manwhore or anything like that - I just have an attractive lifestyle and personality, and its something that women want to be a part of - and I only choose women who are sexually fliberated, i.e not people like yourself.
    whats wrong with my thinking? you can't tell me my opinion is wrong and then say you respect people's morals.

    Definiton of a player: not only using the females for sex, with having more than one partner at a time, pretending you like them.
    How can you say your not a player when you have more than one partner at a time?!

    Just because i agree with monogamy does not mean i am not open minded.
    I do have a realistic worldview point, its you who doesn't which is why so many people have argued with you everything you are saying.

    You really seem very narrowminded.. just because you want variety does not mean everyone else does. Lots of people are happy with one partner and don't feel the need to shag other people at the same time. Its natural to love someone and feel jealous when they cheat on you and feel sad when you are no longer with them, you clearly just havn't had that attachment to someone so don't understand what it feels like.

    'why me? out of all the girls'.. these girls are obviously insecure and want more than what you can offer..
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    (Original post by blondyx)
    whats wrong with my thinking? you can't tell me my opinion is wrong and then say you respect people's morals.

    Definiton of a player: not only using the females for sex, with having more than one partner at a time, pretending you like them.
    How can you say your not a player when you have more than one partner at a time?!

    Just because i agree with monogamy does not mean i am not open minded.
    I do have a realistic worldview point, its you who doesn't which is why so many people have argued with you everything you are saying.

    You really seem very narrowminded.. just because you want variety does not mean everyone else does. Lots of people are happy with one partner and don't feel the need to shag other people at the same time. Its natural to love someone and feel jealous when they cheat on you and feel sad when you are no longer with them, you clearly just havn't had that attachment to someone so don't understand what it feels like.

    'why me? out of all the girls'.. these girls are obviously insecure and want more than what you can offer..
    I respect your opinions and morals, of course I do. They are foolish and wrong, but i respect your right to have them.

    And must you keep using the word, 'player'? You said yourself they pretend to like the girls they sleep with, I DO LIKE THE GIRLS I SLEEP WITH....THERE'S ACTUALLY VERY FEW WOMEN I WOULD SLEEP WITH - BELIEVE ME I ONLY SLEEP WITH THE ONES I AM REALLY INTO AND THAT ARE OK WITH ME NOT BEING MONOGAMOUS.

    OK I'm stopping now as you suggest the girls I sleep with are insecure. To sleep with someone and be genuinely OK with that person sleeping with others, you have to incredibly secure in yourself - like I said, there's really not a lot of girls I would sleep with - only a few quality ones....although I wish more would think for themselves and see what is right in front of their eyes.

    Again, the attachment you feel is just neediness/insecurity. I feel 100% fulfilled on my own. I am not attached to anyone - I just enjoy their company, and the sex.
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    I respect your opinions and morals, of course I do. They are foolish and wrong, but i respect your right to have them.

    And must you keep using the word, 'player'? You said yourself they pretend to like the girls they sleep with, I DO LIKE THE GIRLS I SLEEP WITH....THERE'S ACTUALLY VERY FEW WOMEN I WOULD SLEEP WITH - BELIEVE ME I ONLY SLEEP WITH THE ONES I AM REALLY INTO AND THAT ARE OK WITH ME NOT BEING MONOGAMOUS.

    OK I'm stopping now as you suggest the girls I sleep with are insecure. To sleep with someone and be genuinely OK with that person sleeping with others, you have to incredibly secure in yourself - like I said, there's really not a lot of girls I would sleep with - only a few quality ones....although I wish more would think for themselves and see what is right in front of their eyes.

    Again, the attachment you feel is just neediness/insecurity. I feel 100% fulfilled on my own. I am not attached to anyone - I just enjoy their company, and the sex.
    A player is someone who sleeps with multiple partners.. you are therefore a player..

    Foolish and wrong? there is nothing wrong to want to be faithful to someone.

    if you personally want to sleep with multiple women, then whatever. Your view is very different to alot of people's, so who are you to say that what everyone else thinks is wrong?
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    (Original post by Flying Cookie)
    There is a simple reason for which humans are monogamous. They are selfish and expect to be treated specially.
    But surely, there is nothing wrong with either monogamy or polygamy AS LONG AS the people involved feel good. They usually don't, but hey, there are exceptions.
    SO true actually. Never thought about it in that way.
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    Didn't read the story, but yes I am SURE you are right
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    Evolutioonary Pyshcology would support your argument, however by applying that, the same psychology says that rape is a natural thing (http://iranscope.ghandchi.com/Anthology/Women/rape.htm)

    So unless your teloing us rape is also ok your argument is a bit flawed
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    (Original post by xXMessedUpXx)
    Evolutioonary Pyshcology would support your argument, however by applying that, the same psychology says that rape is a natural thing (http://iranscope.ghandchi.com/Anthology/Women/rape.htm)

    So unless your teloing us rape is also ok your argument is a bit flawed

    Like I said - we should follow our instincts as long as it doesn't affect others' human rights. Rape is obviously wrong.
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    (Original post by Local_United_Fan)
    Like I said - we should follow our instincts as long as it doesn't affect others' human rights. Rape is obviously wrong.
    What about having the right to be in a loving, trusting monogamous relationship without being ****** over by the person who supposedly loves you?
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    interesting
 
 
 
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