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my bf prefers head to sex

well, technically he's my ex but we're trying to sort things out. Anyway, the problem is, often he prefers me going down on him to us having sex. Now i know i have excellent oral skills :wink: but i'm not crap in bed either and i'm just wondering if this is normal?

Sometimes i've even asked for sex and he just kinda pushes my head back down there, which is a lil annoying and kind of insulting! I thought men love sex more than anything?!

It kind of annoys me as well because once i've finished the job, he can't be bothered returning the favour which leaves me a tad frustrated to say the least!

Anyone's views would be much appreciated :smile:

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Reply 1
erm.....


i say strap him to the bed or get a dildo
Reply 2
grace
well, technically he's my ex but we're trying to sort things out. Anyway, the problem is, often he prefers me going down on him to us having sex. Now i know i have excellent oral skills :wink: but i'm not crap in bed either and i'm just wondering if this is normal?

Sometimes i've even asked for sex and he just kinda pushes my head back down there, which is a lil annoying and kind of insulting! I thought men love sex more than anything?!

Anyone's views would be much appreciated :smile:


head is :biggrin:!! Men (im sure) all love head too. By the way, you wanna get back with this guy if all he wants is just bj's?

It kind of annoys me as well because once i've finished the job, he can't be bothered returning the favour which leaves me a tad frustrated to say the least!


Tell him to 'finish you' off first before you give him the suck.
Reply 3
i think hes just being selfish. my boyfriend always INSISTS on giving me something in return if i was to give him a bj.

im my opinion he dosent really care about what you feel and only on his own pleasure.

dont get back with him. get a man that will treat you right in that way :redface:

edit: he sounds quite lazy too me actually. do u ever get on top (excuse my bluntness) when 'doin' it?
Reply 4
Mathemagician
head is :biggrin:!! Men (im sure) all love head too. By the way, you wanna get back with this guy if all he wants is just bj's?



Tell him to 'finish you' off first before you give him the suck.


i know men love head, i just didn't think they would prefer it over sex. Us getting back together would have more to do with the fact that we still love each other than our sexual preferences.

I've tried refusing until he gets me off first but he can be very insistant and sometimes even a bit forceful (we know what men are like when they're horny :smile: ).

I guess i just want to know if this has more to do with him liking blow jobs so much or with him not liking having sex with me?
Reply 5
My girlfriend has amazing skills when it comes to oral which mean I really really enjoy it however that doesn't mean I don't enjoy sex too :smile: And I most certainly would repay any favours the best I could :biggrin:
Some guys prefer head, some don't (including me). Tbh if he's being insistant tell him to **** off and get himself off :P. I'd be fairly sure that it's just him prefering bjs though rather than not liking having sex with you but you're the best person to answer that, not us!
I asked my boyfriend that question last night actually, which he preferred. His reply was 'do you really not know?' He preferred sex. Maybe should try asking your boyfriend to develop on the reasons for his preference?
Reply 8
Personal preferences are fair enough, but not returning the favour? Not on. Especially if he's forceful about it. If you feel like you can, talk tohim about it. Say it's worrying you.
Reply 9
dogtanian
Personal preferences are fair enough, but not returning the favour? Not on. Especially if he's forceful about it. If you feel like you can, talk tohim about it. Say it's worrying you.


yeah, i tried asking him a couple of days ago...i'd just gone down on him, was FREAKIN horny and said to him "does it ever occur to you that i might want something as well? or do you just not realise that i get horny too?" and he just said "yeah, it occurs to me sometimes."

That was that. Pffff.
Reply 10
Staying in a relationship where there isn't sexual compatability isn't good. It's usually an indicator of something else wrong IMO. I'd leave well alone and just move on. You can still love someone but not be in love. You can love someone but it might not be right for you to be bf/gf.
Reply 11
blissy
Staying in a relationship where there isn't sexual compatability isn't good. It's usually an indicator of something else wrong IMO. I'd leave well alone and just move on. You can still love someone but not be in love. You can love someone but it might not be right for you to be bf/gf.


*sigh* oh blissy. But when we do have sex it's always fantastic and really passionate and loving. It just doesn't happen as often as i'd like! Is that really a reason not to get back together?!
grace
yeah, i tried asking him a couple of days ago...i'd just gone down on him, was FREAKIN horny and said to him "does it ever occur to you that i might want something as well? or do you just not realise that i get horny too?" and he just said "yeah, it occurs to me sometimes."

That was that. Pffff.


Sorry, but he sounds like an absolute asshole.
Reply 13
grace
*sigh* oh blissy. But when we do have sex it's always fantastic and really passionate and loving. It just doesn't happen as often as i'd like! Is that really a reason not to get back together?!

Yes.

See PM :smile:
He sounds pretty selfish/lazy in my opinion. Why don't you just not give him head for a while and I'm pretty sure he'd come round to the idea of sex. And then I'd tell him he's not getting any of that until he makes up for lost time on the oral sex front and send him down south. :p:
Reply 15
I think there needs to be a blance in any sexual relationship and there doesn't seem to be one here. Even if he does just prefer head the fact he is unwilling to give you what you want imo is an indicator of not really caring about you. That may sound a little harsh but my boyfriend does things for me - 'Just because he likes to see me happy' I think that's how relationships should be. xx
Reply 16
englishstudent
He sounds pretty selfish/lazy in my opinion. Why don't you just not give him head for a while and I'm pretty sure he'd come round to the idea of sex. And then I'd tell him he's not getting any of that until he makes up for lost time on the oral sex front and send him down south. :p:


yeah i've tried that as well. He's agreed to go down on me if i let him take me from *aherm* behind. Not gonna happen. I'm keeping my brown wings, thank you very much!

To be honest i think i'm just too accomodating, i never say no and have given him head at the most inopportune moments, such as while he's driving down the M25. Maybe i just need to say no more often?!
Reply 17
Now he's bribing you???

Grrrr!!! I would be so angry at him!
Reply 18
NO NO NO NO NO!

ooo what a meany!
*would not still love someone who is so obviously selfish*
Reply 19
*nods head in agreement*