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University and being gay... or maybe bisexual Watch

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    #1

    Please keep anon or delete, thanks.

    I've been out for a few years, but now I've been having these feelings for girls lately, and I've wondered whether now I might be bisexual...

    All my friends believe I'm gay, and I haven't told any of them about my recent thoughts.

    When I go to University, I don't know what to do... I won't say anything unless asked, but in the event of being asked, what do I say? I'm gay (because that's what all my friends at home know), I'm bisexual (although no one at home knows), or I'm just unsure?

    I really hate being labelled, but I know it's going to happen. I have no problem myself with what I am, whether I like guys or girls, it's all about the person, regardless of their gender.

    Just don't know what to do... what's going to be easier? or should I just be true, regardless of what people know already?
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    Labels are for jars.... just go with the flow and be true to yourself.
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    Sexuality is a very fluid thing. Very, very few people are completely straight or gay, I think.
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    It'd be nice to be able to put everyone in boxes. I for one would love to shove someone in a box, and point at them saying they're gay whilst they're stuck in it...

    Sexuality always seems to be a sliding analogue scale. You don't have to be one thing or the other. University gives you lots of freedom to try almost anything you want. If this is really getting to you then join the LGBT - also, the Uni should have a service called Nightline which you can ring, it's confidential and non-judgemental, sort of like the Samaritans.

    People are so much more accepting at Uni, and those who aren't accepting tend to be ignored, or few people bother with them. You've got nothing to worry about. Just be yourself.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Please keep anon or delete, thanks.

    I've been out for a few years, but now I've been having these feelings for girls lately, and I've wondered whether now I might be bisexual...

    All my friends believe I'm gay, and I haven't told any of them about my recent thoughts.

    When I go to University, I don't know what to do... I won't say anything unless asked, but in the event of being asked, what do I say? I'm gay (because that's what all my friends at home know), I'm bisexual (although no one at home knows), or I'm just unsure?

    I really hate being labelled, but I know it's going to happen. I have no problem myself with what I am, whether I like guys or girls, it's all about the person, regardless of their gender.

    Just don't know what to do... what's going to be easier? or should I just be true, regardless of what people know already?
    Wow i'm in like the exact same situation as you excpet i'm female.
    Everyone thinks i'm gay including my parents and have believed so for about 3 years. My Parents think it's okay to be Gay? But that there is no in between, and that bisexuals arn't real. I'm in a long term relationship with a girl, so everyone decided i must be gay, even though i myself wasn't sure and got forced to accept the label. Now i'm freaking out because the relationship i'm in right now is great BUT i know that if it doesn't work out then in the future i could be quite happy with a guy. You got it spot on when you said it's all about the person. So hmm, not sure what to tell any new uni friends either. I suppose i'll tell new people i'm just not sure or that i'm bi, and deal with my home friends and parents later!
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    Just say you're open minded and keep them all guessing. There's no rush to put a label on yourself...it's just a pity society need labels so much. University will be a great time to discover who you are, start afresh and have some fun.
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    In my experience, the first time you get off with a guy at uni, people will believe you are gay, no matter what you say, and you chances with girls will be severely restricted. It's very annoying.
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    be straight
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    PS Helper
    I don't think that you should put a label on yourself if you're unsure about your sexuality. University is pretty liberal and most of the people you meet really won't care either way; just go there be yourself and if anybody asks just be honest with them.
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    (Original post by mitsabeeba)
    be straight
    :no:
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    Personally I think you'e better off telling them you are open minded or unsure because then you have the possibility to go both ways. If you set yourself out as gay then you may find it harder to approach females.
    Just be yourself, I don't think people at Uni often put people in boxes anyway. The first semeseter is all about having lots of fun and I don't really think you will be forced to choose a path so to speak. Just go with the flow and be how you want to be.
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    (Original post by mitsabeeba)
    be straight
    Be an atheist.
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    You don't have to label yourself, just be who you are!
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    Say "I'm generally gay, but open to most things." Except possibly if chatting up a girl.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Wow i'm in like the exact same situation as you excpet i'm female.
    Everyone thinks i'm gay including my parents and have believed so for about 3 years. My Parents think it's okay to be Gay? But that there is no in between, and that bisexuals arn't real. I'm in a long term relationship with a girl, so everyone decided i must be gay, even though i myself wasn't sure and got forced to accept the label. Now i'm freaking out because the relationship i'm in right now is great BUT i know that if it doesn't work out then in the future i could be quite happy with a guy. You got it spot on when you said it's all about the person. So hmm, not sure what to tell any new uni friends either. I suppose i'll tell new people i'm just not sure or that i'm bi, and deal with my home friends and parents later!
    I think OP is female. :confused:
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    (Original post by TylerDurden)
    I think OP is female. :confused:
    I don't think so:

    (Original post by Anonymous)

    I've been out for a few years, but now I've been having these feelings for girls lately, and I've wondered whether now I might be bisexual...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Thanks for all the replies... I like the whole "open minded" business, makes it less definite
 
 
 
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