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how do I stop being a ***** and a horrible person? Watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    nah, we don't live near each other and i don't know anyone named "tom". must be someone else.
    Then the advice I'm giving will be fresh for you.
    If you're in an abusive relationship it says something about you and him.
    It says about you that you'll let him abuse you. That you'll let him do what he wants. It says about him that he's okay (at least for the time when he abuses you) with abusing you.

    You need to start having a self esteem and realise, all the time, you're equal to other humans, not below them. You need to get rid of him and get involved with other activities. A running group, martial arts, a book reading group, whatever. Meet people that way. I know all this is far easier said than done but don't expect it to be easy, this will be hard, but it is doable.

    Furthermore you need to work out if you're ready for a relationship with anyone after being in an abusive relationship. If things were okay you wouldn't want to be with someone else, you wouldn't have posted your boyfriend being a **** as a reason for wanting to be with someone else. At the very least I hope this post acts as a wake up call, as a splash of cold water on your face.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I will elaborate a bit further

    My boyfriend is a **** a lot of the time. He's hit me, he shouts at me and makes me cry for little things (like spilling food and drink), but then afterwards he always say he's sorry. He's just irritable. Sounds worse than it is tbh. (See, this is the part where I justify what I'm doing!!).

    His friends are my friends. I met him through them. So if I dump him, I won't have any friends at all. His friends wouldn't forgive me. Hence being alone.

    And I really do like both of these guys at once. I've known online boy for a lot longer and really like him. I've never been so cruel to him, although sometimes I could spare him the details, so to speak.

    I know that going out with online boy is 100% unrealistic. I don't really know what to do.

    Personally, I'd prefer to be alone than with someone who made me cry.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I will elaborate a bit further

    My boyfriend is a **** a lot of the time. He's hit me, he shouts at me and makes me cry for little things (like spilling food and drink), but then afterwards he always say he's sorry. He's just irritable. Sounds worse than it is tbh. (See, this is the part where I justify what I'm doing!!).

    His friends are my friends. I met him through them. So if I dump him, I won't have any friends at all. His friends wouldn't forgive me. Hence being alone.

    And I really do like both of these guys at once. I've known online boy for a lot longer and really like him. I've never been so cruel to him, although sometimes I could spare him the details, so to speak.

    I know that going out with online boy is 100% unrealistic. I don't really know what to do.
    In that case, I'd advise you to dump your boyfriend - no-one deserves to be hit and no self respecting man would ever, ever hit their girlfriend! I'd say your indiscretion pales into insignificance compared to his faults. Even if you do lose friends, you cannot stay with a man like that without going mad.
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    (Original post by FormerlyFrisbeeFan)
    In that case, I'd advise you to dump your boyfriend - no-one deserves to be hit and no self respecting man would ever, ever hit their girlfriend! I'd say your indiscretion pales into insignificance compared to his faults. Even if you do lose friends, you cannot stay with a man like that without going mad.
    Is it not also about how much respect the op has for herself?
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    (Original post by there's too much love)
    Is it not also about how much respect the op has for herself?
    Yes of course, I'm advising her to get out of the relationship not only to avoid being hit but also to avoid the further deterioration of her self-respect (already lacking to some extent) and mental health.
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    uh just block internet freak and stick with the real-life one.
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    Don't even bother trying. It's incurable.
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    (Original post by mitsabeeba)
    uh just block internet freak and stick with the real-life one.
    uh read the other post the op made.
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    You didn't really do much....is that you think that you were trying to make the other guy feel bad because you know he likes you? Don't beat yourself up about it, everyone does stupid things every once in a while. If everyone got a penny for every stupid thing they did then everyone would be soooo poor seeing as how all the pennies would have been distributed thrice over. And we'd probably run out of pennies, thus incurring hyperinflation....you get my point though that we all make mistakes.
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    (Original post by there's too much love)
    uh read the other post the op made.
    all info should be in the first original post.
    i have no time to scroll through the whole thread just to find out other info. i dont care that much.
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    (Original post by mitsabeeba)
    all info should be in the first original post.
    i have no time to scroll through the whole thread just to find out other info. i dont care that much.

    firstly: if you have time to post you have time to read, there's less than a page.
    Secondly: you could easily press control f and search for what the op says.
    Thirdly: if you don't care that much why do you even bother posting and giving advice?

    Now if the thread was say, 10 pages long, I could kind of understand that, I tend to not post in those threads because everything will have probably been said already. But I can see how everyone posting when they don't care that much can be oh so useful.
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    (Original post by there's too much love)
    firstly: if you have time to post you have time to read, there's less than a page.
    Secondly: you could easily press control f and search for what the op says.
    Thirdly: if you don't care that much why do you even bother posting and giving advice?

    Now if the thread was say, 10 pages long, I could kind of understand that, I tend to not post in those threads because everything will have probably been said already. But I can see how everyone posting when they don't care that much can be oh so useful.
    ok calm down.
 
 
 
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