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'Real' friends at uni? watch

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    I have quite a useful acid test for this sort of situation. Imagine you're all on a night out and moving on to a different club/bar, and the group is gathered outside the place you're leaving. If it happened that you were in the loo and didn't know they were leaving, think about who, even when slightly tipsy, would pipe up and say "hang on, should we not wait for (insert your name)?"

    Those people are your friends.
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    everyone's an acquaintances to me lol, didn't even feel anything when i left school having known people for around 8 years, won't speak to them again as well either. Ah well life moves on
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    like 3 out of my 4 best friends are at uni

    (not saying i only have 4 friends...)
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    Real friends DON'T exist.
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    (Original post by abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz)
    everyone's an acquaintances to me lol, didn't even feel anything when i left school having known people for around 8 years, won't speak to them again as well either. Ah well life moves on
    That is a good attitude to have. :yes:
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    (Original post by Gordon_Brown)
    I find that it's impossible to make a real friend. They all stab me in the back :sad: even my wife votes Tory now.

    My child's first words:

    "I hate you Dad, I'm voting Tory"
    that's so wrong about his child.
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    (Original post by Psycho0101)
    Real friends DON'T exist.
    liez.
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    (Original post by Psycho0101)
    That is a good attitude to have. :yes:
    don't know if you're being sarcastic but i agree either way :p: life moves on, at the end of the day friends are temporary imo
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    (Original post by abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz)
    don't know if you're being sarcastic but i agree either way :p: life moves on, at the end of the day friends are temporary imo
    i don't think it's a good attitude. i think you should make the most of now and not think about what you're going to have in the future because you simply don't know what you're going to have.

    just give your all to life and you'll get great returns.
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    Well I live in wales and most of my friends from uni live in northern england or otherwise quite far away.

    meh I wouldn't worry too much as you can see most of us are all in the same boat....it's not a rare thing.

    Just chill, enjoy the summer and look forward to getting down to some book learning next term xx
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    (Original post by abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz)
    don't know if you're being sarcastic but i agree either way :p: life moves on, at the end of the day friends are temporary imo
    Look at my previous post on this thread. I agree with you.
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    (Original post by Totally Tom)
    i don't think it's a good attitude. i think you should make the most of now and not think about what you're going to have in the future because you simply don't know what you're going to have.

    just give your all to life and you'll get great returns.
    What do you mean by i don't know what i'm going to have?
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    (Original post by abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz)
    What do you mean by i don't know what i'm going to have?
    well, you don't know that in 10 years you're gonna have a group of close friends or w/e
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    i kinda agree the first people i hung around with never called for me and took the piss which went further than just banter.
    luckily i realised this in the first term and the guys on my corse were great lads.
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    No OP, I have the same thing. I do get along well with my friends at uni, but for the ones I hang out with regularly, I still feel like I'm not totally close to them. It's only normal given we've only been with them for maximum 8 months, though; plus the experiences tend to be quite superficial (getting drunk & having a great night aren't always the most bonding experiences ever). Hopefully that will change when they come and visit me in Brussels and we have a merry old time.

    (Original post by Freckley Tim)
    I have quite a useful acid test for this sort of situation. Imagine you're all on a night out and moving on to a different club/bar, and the group is gathered outside the place you're leaving. If it happened that you were in the loo and didn't know they were leaving, think about who, even when slightly tipsy, would pipe up and say "hang on, should we not wait for (insert your name)?"

    Those people are your friends.
    I have to say I kinda agree with this. I do have some friends who blatantly don't acknowledge and respect me as much as others (e.g. on my birthday, 3 out of my 6 good friends who joined me decided to ditch me halfway through the night for another club), and it's the little favours like that which really help.
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    (Original post by Totally Tom)
    well, you don't know that in 10 years you're gonna have a group of close friends or w/e
    wouldn't make a difference if i did :p: eventually i'd just leave/they'd just leave so it's back to square one. Prefer to keep myself to myself, life is nice and simple that way
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    (Original post by Gordon_Brown)
    What if - in all seriousness - I'm being genuine? :sad: How bad do you think my life is right now? Anyone else would consider suicide, but people talking to me on here is enough for me to keep going. I just need real human contact I'm so very lonely.
    Don't worry, Gordon. You're still doing better than the Lib Dems.
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    (Original post by Gordon_Brown)
    What if - in all seriousness - I'm being genuine? :sad: How bad do you think my life is right now? Anyone else would consider suicide, but people talking to me on here is enough for me to keep going. I just need real human contact I'm so very lonely.
















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    from seeing my own friends, they all seem to have made loads of friends at uni but they look forward to seeing their school friends so im unsure
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon/delete please.

    Just finished 1st year of uni...made lots of friends, and got close to probs about 20. I'm in 2 groups, one is housemates who I'm not that close to but I get on well with, and another group who I really enjoy hanging out with but they take lots of drugs which I don't like doing. Even so I go out with them, have funny experiences and we're all going to hang out at each others' houses next year.

    Found out through facebook that the second group have been meeting up quite a bit throughout the summer, and it's made me feel a bit ****, like I haven't really made any real friends at uni.

    Also, being back home I've started hanging out with my old school friends (we keep in touch and went on holiday together, and have been friends for years) has made me see how my friends at uni are more like acquaintances than close friends.

    Just wondering...do you think everyone's the same here? Are your school friends who you've grown up with always closer than uni friends, who you've only known for a few months? Maybe I've got the wrong mentality but it feels like everyone else has made all these strong friendships with each other and I haven't, and it's made me rather lonely...I just hope I'm not the only one.
    This kinda happened to me, but they were my high school friends, who I'm not really that close to and have very little in common with. I know they meet up and go clubbing quite regularly, which is fine cos I'm not into clubbing, but I found out a couple of weeks ago that one of the friends that I was closer to had a birthday party and didn't invite me. I got quite upset just because we've known her since we were 11 and I've always thought well of her. But when I started thinking about all the times she was rude to me and talked down me and how she was obsessed with being 'popular'. It made me realise that she was actually a really ****** friend!

    I've made 3 really good friends Uni, who I love to bits. But I'm going to do a Post Grad in Sept. I was going to move in with 2 of my Uni mates but decided to go to another city and am looking foward to being alone and meeting new people.

    Don't get so disheartened over your Uni mates. It could be that they all live closer so it was easier for them to meet up. Also It's only been a year. It takes time to for friendships to get stronger. Facebook has a way of making everything look great. Maybe this is a good thing, and it'll force you to start mixing with other people in your course. One of my biggest regrets in Uni was getting too 'comfortable' with my mates and not making more of an effort getting to know other people.
 
 
 
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