To those who reply with help - Thank you! This took me a while to write it will also take you a while to read... I appreciate the effort you put in.
Anon or delete please!
Hello Student Room,
Today I come with a dilema, which of course i'd probably like to keep confidential as there is a chance (however slight it maybe, that she could read this - leading to eternal embarrassment)..
Now, onto the problem at hand..
We've all just finished our A-levels, and summer has began. I've been in this 'friendship group' since the start of A levels (2 years), I moved to this college from a far. Over the process of time, and metting new people, I met this girl (we shall call her, Jo).. This girl Jo, i've steady become better and better friends with her. It first started on a bus, where i'd walk her home every day from college (she lives very close), then when I began to drive, i'd give her lifts into college and back again (without asking payment etc - I don't charge fuel to friends, FYI) and we also work (in seperate departments, but we do work together)
Gradually, over time we've become closer and closer, and then she got a boyfriend (around 8 months ago) this boyfriend, was a complete cee you next tuesday, and cheated on her whilst she was on holiday. When she came back, she obviously split up with this guy.. and a few months later, she got back together... around 1 month ago, they split up again (this time she said she simply didn't like him) and now hes chasing her like a dog craving for food. She on the other hand isn't interested (as far as I can see...)
Now, the background info is over, now for the real problem. I'm not all together sure, if she likes me (properly), or is it a friendship liking? For those girls reading this - YOU PEOPLE ARE HORRIBLE, mixed messages constantly! Examples of mixed messages to follow:
- She came back from a 'girlies holiday', and when she saw me in work, her face lit up (never seen it so happy in my life) and ran and hugged me
- At work, we have a jewelry area, and she keeps saying, So.. When are you gonna buy me this?
- Texting (heres the bad stuff), when at college, I used to see her text CONSTANTLY to different people, I text her, once a day (on average) and I get a fast response - however, sometimes I intend on extending the conversation, to which she answers my question, but does not follow up with a question to me... (maybe this is me being stupid - but that seems quite bad)
- In real life, she speaks to me as much as she can (as I do to her also), when I see her, I chat... (this kind of contradicts the texting problem)
- When we go out on a night out, i'm usually the first for her to greet (and usually the only one with a hug), also last one to say good bye to (again, with a hug)
They are just some examples. Now, I don't want to look like an idiot, and say to her: "Listen, I think you're amazing and I like you, but what do you think of me in terms of a relationship?" - because that would make me look like an idiot and make things awkward if she says differently.
If i'm honest, I think i'm worried too much about the awkwardness, and the idiot I then become to my friendship group, when she turns round and says she likes me for a friend... and i'm also worried, that by saying this stuff, she will act differently now (for example, she will avoid hugging me as often - and I can't lose that close bond, I seem to have gotten with her - which nobody else seems to have got)
Should I stop being a wimp and actually do something? Or should I sit back, and hope? Any suggestions please.
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