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Break up troubles

Anon as friends use.

To cut a long story short, I was seeing my girlfriend for over a year, and a couple of weeks ago, she comes out of nowhere saying that she doesn't think our relationship is going anywhere, and she needs space. So we went on a break, but we still talked and saw each other a little in the weeks we were apart.

Now when we broke up, she was saying she thought we'd be back together soon, in a couple of weeks, she just didn't want to be in a relationship at the moment (she had some things going on at home). Every time we spoke she hinted and insisted that she wanted to get back together eventually.

We saw each other a couple of days ago, and ended up kissing, with her saying that it would be much better when we're back together. A day or so later, I find out that she's been seeing her ex again. To make this worse, it was her ex who had cheated on her more than once before. :mad:

So in short, in the time we were on a break, she'd been insisting that we'd be back together, that she wanted us to be back together, then I find out she's back with her ex, and now she's telling me that our relationship wouldn't work, and she doesn't want to be with me, even after a year of being perfect together.

What I don't understand is how she could go back to someone who had cheated on her, I mean, I know I'm not the best person in the world, but I tried my hardest to be the most perfect boyfriend I could be; yet she goes back to someone who broke her heart, her trust, used her and cheated on her. :frown:

When she went out with me the last time, after we'd broken up, she'd told her ex that she was breaking up with me finally, but she ended up kissing me, and saying we'd be back together soon, and I don't know what to think now.

I mean, even now, despite being lied to and my heart shattered, I still love her more than anything, and I still want her back. :frown:

That's not all though, I'm seeing her again, and I'm not sure what to make of it, as she doesn't seem sure of what she wants anymore either - if she didn't still feel something for me, why would she want to see me again?

It's just so confusing, I love her so much, and all I want is for her to be happy, but I just can't stand to think that she is with someone who has hurt her so much before, I just know that can't be what she wants. :frown:

Sorry for the lengthy post, I just don't know what to think anymore, any advice anyone?

Thanks :smile:

Reply 1

x-Disenchanted-x

I'm so sorry to hear you've been treated that way. :frown:

But if that guy has cheated on her so many times, I'll bet he'll just use her again. They are exes for a reason and I doubt there's full trust there if she's been hurt a few times before.
I think this will wake her up and make her realise how lucky she was with you and she'll regret ever taking you for granted. I think there's a high possibility she'll come running back as soon as he does something else...people with a record like his rarely "change" as they say they do.
It's up to you how you'd react if she did come back to you...but to be honest, you sound like a lovely person and deserving of someone who will fully appreciate that rather than walk all over you. Letting go will be extremely hard, but you have to make room in your life and let go of the past to be able to welcome someone new for your future.
You are the best judge of what makes you happy, and I hope you find a way to have the happiness you deserve.
I wish you all the luck in the world. You deserve someone who'll treat you right. :smile:

Reply 2

DaneCook

Take it on the chin and move on. No point crying about it on here, if she wants you and you're prepared to take her back she'll come around. If not, move on.

Reply 3

ToeRag

Girls like a bad boy I'm afraid... if you treated her like sh1t you'd probably still be together..

Just move on and know for next time... don't be so available for her and she'll prob get back in touch anyway...

Also, tell her ex you and her kissed, may as well f uck that up for her as a passing gesture..

Reply 4

mattydedon

i hate it when people get treated like dirt on shoe soles, walked over, its even worse when the victim just takes all the gripe and doesnt decide to do something about it,

love doesnt mean the license to be given grief, i prefer practical love, the love with enough sense to see that you are treated like **** and dont deserve it, move on, live your life, and dont be a beach ball