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My friend is so negative and MOODY. Watch

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    Anon because my friend is on here. She has always been negative and miserable and pessimistic. Nothing bad has happened to her, she has had a great lifestyle, her parents have showered her with love and affection and money, yet all she does is complain, and quite frankly its ******* me off. She zaps the life out of me and makes me feel drained. Natrually I'm a very upbeat and happy person but recently I'm finding myself being influenced by her. Has anyone else been through this?
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    Maybe there's an underlying problem there. Some people can be really depressed on the inside even though on the surface it appears they have everything. Why don't you just talk to her and asks if there's anything wrong?
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    How do you know that nothing bad has happened to her? Maybe she has some personal issues to deal with.
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    Maybe she does have some personal issues. But being negative 24/7 is not going to help surely? I just want to see her be a little more open minded and positive about things from time to time.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Maybe she does have some personal issues. But being negative 24/7 is not going to help surely? I just want to see her be a little more open minded and positive about things from time to time.

    I can't help but be negative and pessimistic and my friends are constantly telling me not to be. I once tried to give it up for Lent and lasted a day. It's not easy to act happy if you are not.
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    (Original post by fallen angel9)
    I can't help but be negative and pessimistic and my friends are constantly telling me not to be. I once tried to give it up for Lent and lasted a day. It's not easy to act happy if you are not.
    Aww

    Are there underlying issues or are you naturally pessimistic? I find being happy and positive once in a while helps no end, I just wish my friend (and other negative people) could realise how much of a difference it makes.
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    Ask her what's wrong. As in really wrong. Surely if she's so miserable, then something must be seriously bugging her. If she doesn't want to tell you, then tell her you can't sympathize.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon because my friend is on here. She has always been negative and miserable and pessimistic. Nothing bad has happened to her, she has had a great lifestyle, her parents have showered her with love and affection and money, yet all she does is complain, and quite frankly its ******* me off. She zaps the life out of me and makes me feel drained. Natrually I'm a very upbeat and happy person but recently I'm finding myself being influenced by her. Has anyone else been through this?
    The person youre talking about sounds a lot like me lol. I suggest you just let her be. You might think she's had the "perfect life" but it might not be true. Unless you put yourself in her shoes you won't be able to understand her.
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    yeah been through it, its a bit of a shame. if you ease things off with her and stuff then she'll either miss your company and lessen her moaning or move on, if she moves in you know shes not a real friend.
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    (Original post by Eva2)
    The person youre talking about sounds a lot like me lol. I suggest you just let her be. You might think she's had the "perfect life" but it might not be true. Unless you put yourself in her shoes you won't be able to understand her.
    :ditto:
    Exactly what I was thinking! :yes:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Maybe she does have some personal issues. But being negative 24/7 is not going to help surely? I just want to see her be a little more open minded and positive about things from time to time.

    Have you asked if there's anything wrong, and whats making her feel like this? She will probably open up to you and tell you the problems if there are some, and if not then talk to her about all the good things in her life and let her know what she has going for her in her life and try and tell her how to get some perspective and help her through feeling bad. That's what friends are for, good and bad
    Hope it sorts out for you, op!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Aww

    Are there underlying issues or are you naturally pessimistic? I find being happy and positive once in a while helps no end, I just wish my friend (and other negative people) could realise how much of a difference it makes.
    Thank you for your concern! It's both really.
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    (Original post by Choccielatte)
    :ditto:
    Exactly what I was thinking! :yes:
    at last! someone that actually agrees with my opinion! lol.
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    I have a similar friend, although she is going through tough times she doesnt look at anything positive and just complains about reasons why she can't fix things when she easily could.
    • #2
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    Anon as I could actually be the person you're talking about from what you wrote :p:
    But seriously, if she's being pessimistic a lot of the time, there's a reason for it. My parents outwardly shower me with 'affection' but in reality it's nothing but cold money. They fight the whole time, I can't talk to them, there's constant conflict at home, my grandfather is ill, I had a lot of problems at school before I left and felt thoroughly miserable for a good long time, yet because outwardly I didn't have any obvious problems (live in a nice area, big house, had everything materially that I wanted etc etc) everyone assumed that I was just being ridiculous. Give your friend some support!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon as I could actually be the person you're talking about from what you wrote :p:
    But seriously, if she's being pessimistic a lot of the time, there's a reason for it. My parents outwardly shower me with 'affection' but in reality it's nothing but cold money. They fight the whole time, I can't talk to them, there's constant conflict at home, my grandfather is ill, I had a lot of problems at school before I left and felt thoroughly miserable for a good long time, yet because outwardly I didn't have any obvious problems (live in a nice area, big house, had everything materially that I wanted etc etc) everyone assumed that I was just being ridiculous. Give your friend some support!
    You could genuinely be me! And I could equally be the person you are talking about OP. There could be stuff going on for her that she isn't telling you or even admitting to herself! I know it can be annoying and frustrating but let her tell you in her own time.
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    yes you make think oh she's moaning and unhappy all the time, why when she's got nothing to be unhappy about, but maybe she has depression? you know like someone else said it's hard to act happy when your not, it ends up just being awkward and fake when you do that. People aren't unhappy because they choose to be. But rather they can't help it. You may think if she does X,Y or Z all her problems will be solved, but rarely when you're unhappy can you think logically, you focus on the bad parts of your life and how nothing works out, leading to more unhappy thoughts. Please try to be a good friend and find out WHY she is feeling this way rather than being so harsh.
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    I am pretty much the friend you just described. If she's anything like me: something is more wrong than you realise, and the appearance of her "great" life means absolutely nothing. Talk to her about it. Don't just write it off as her being "moody."
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    one more anon claiming to be that person and I'm going to run into a concrete wall headfirst.
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    I used to be like her; I think it was mainly my parents' divorce, and my shyness, that really screwed me up for a while. But eventually I got over it, and now I try my hardest to be happy and optimistic.

    I have a friend who is incredibly negative and judgemental about others, and it's so annoying. She won't welcome any new friends into our circle, criticises others' relationships (despite hers not being perfect; but if anyone points this out she'll jump down their throat) and never compliments anyone on anything. She used to be so fun, too!

    Don't abandon her, but try not to get sucked in
 
 
 
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